


everything up til yesterday was a prologue

by soozu



Category: Lego Ninjago
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Angst with a Happy Ending, Characters and Tags will be updated by chapter, Cole is a Ghost, Everybody loves Cole, Fluff and Angst, Ghost!Cole AU, Hurt/Comfort, Lloyd Nya and Pixal will be more background characters, M/M, Multi, Mutual Pining, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, The Gang's in college, op is detail-oriented and wanna teach life skills too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-28
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-05-29 17:46:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 46,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15078371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soozu/pseuds/soozu
Summary: Cole has been stuck as a ghost for as long as he can remember. However, when people start moving in to the house where he lives, he begins to feel hope that someone will eventually find him and rescue him from his fate.Likewise, Jay doesn't expect to see a transparent young man standing in his bedroom at night. Neither do Kai and Zane, and he figures that they all should stop screaming and throwing his stuff at the ghost at one point.





	1. at last, hello, you've opened your eyes

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic in a very long time. Please give me your opinions and criticism when necessary!  
> Title is from RADWIMPS - Sparkle (English version)

Cole wakes up to emptiness. It seems that he has fallen into another trance yet again, sitting next to a window in one of the rooms of this house he’s bound to. The sun is starting to set and when he moves, the dust particles glimmering in the soft light don’t swirl into the air. Maybe once upon a time when he was full of life, he has passed this window and caught them spiraling in motion, casting odd shadows against the wooden floor. He misses that memory.

The house has been empty for a while. He doesn’t quite remember how long it has been that way, but it is long enough that the passage of time becomes incomprehensible. His memories have faded to a stream of murky thoughts. The dust that gathered around corners seem to blur into his mind and he sits there, patiently waiting by the single large window of this empty room on this empty floor.

He wishes he can smell the dust. He wishes that he can remember what he’s waiting for.

That thought vanishes however, when he hears multiple vehicles coming in to the little driveway of his house. He stands to look outside, pushing his forehead against the window, barely flinching when the protective barrier around the house stings him. Suddenly there’s something exciting, something new.

He watches as a black minivan pulls into the driveway, while a dark red car and a U-Haul parks out front by the curb. Out of the minivan come two men and a woman, one taller in stature with a shock of white hair, probably dyed, and the driver, who a head shorter with reddish brown hair. The woman has dark grey hair and she seems to be struggling with a heavy box. The other vehicles’ doors also open. The dark red car is driven solo by a young woman with black hair that’s kept in a high ponytail, while the U-Haul has two men: a spunky looking brunette in red and a smaller blonde in green. They’re all talking and unloading boxes and containers and the little brunette, not in red, but blue is walking up to the entrance of his house, key in hand.

Cole pulls back with a jolt. The energy around the house sizzles when the front door is open and he can see new air currents taking over the stagnance of this old house.

People are moving in.

For the first time in over a year, he feels hope in his heart.

 

* * *

 

They move in when the sun is setting. The evening breeze is a breath of fresh air after the sweltering afternoon that Jay and his friends spent hawling their stuffs onto their cars. He takes a deep breath, almost exaggerated, and feels the air circulate within his lungs. It’s nice here, much more peaceful than the little trailer he used to live in with his parents. Now that he’s close to graduating college, he decided to leave to find a place of his own. His friends followed suit. They came across this old house a while back and decided to get it on a whim. That should’ve been an impossible feat especially for a couple of college kids, but Zane got it for cheap. Something about a friend of a friend of his dad. Jay looks over at the white haired man who’s helping his friend move some boxes out and decides he should open the door soon.

His house, well, he guess _their_ house now, his and Kai’s and Zane’s (he’s still trying to get used to it) sits a little further away from the general suburban area, near the base of a large hill. Albeit small, the backyard is pleasantly spacious, even with unkempt plants growing up to the steps of the back porch. Where he stands on the front porch, he can see the rickety old planks that are slowly peeling off the floor. There are cobwebs in the corner, the dust settles thick on the window sills and the mailbox by the door squeaks noisily when he opens it. The sun is setting down and from where he stands he can see the way the light hits the trees of the nearby forest, casting everything in a warm glow.

He can make a home out of this place, he reckons.

His friends chattering in the background break his train of thought. He turns around as Kai calls out, arms straining with two boxes full of clothes.

“Jay, just open the door already! It’s gonna get dark soon!” Kai pants, impatiently bouncing on his heels by the steps towards the porch. Nya, his sister, is helping Lloyd carry along a huge container full of clothes; apparently they’re already forming a line behind him with Zane and Pixal chatting quietly behind them with boxes of their own.

“Yeah, sure, hold on,” Jay replies before pushing the door completely. The air in the house when he walks in is musty, but not overwhelming. The house itself has been kept mostly clean for easy move in, but the barren state makes him wonder if the previous owners, or even those that built the house, had even lived in it themselves. He steps further inside and presses the door close to the wall for his friends’ easy access. “I’m gonna go and unlock all the rooms, okay?”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” Kai answers distractedly, too busy with dumping his boxes down right by the door. Nya walks backwards in right after as she helps Lloyd carry a container into the house. When they settle down, dust swirls up in the air and she coughs, fanning her face.

“Hey, Jay? Can you go and air out the place while you’re at it?” She asks him, wiping sweat from her brow. Lloyd nods along before sneezing loudly besides her, jostling a small “Oh, my.” from Pixal as she walks pass.

Jay looks at her and looks back outside where Kai has gone out to get more stuff. “Are you sure? We should move everything in before night falls. I heard it’s gonna rain later, too.”

“I agree. We should get everything in first,” Zane butts in, patting his dusty hands on his jeans to no avail, “I checked the weather update an hour ago. There’s a 60% chance it will rain, and I wouldn’t want to get my electronics wet.”

“Okay, Zane’s right,” Jay agrees immediately, “I have all my plane models and computers that I need to get in. Lloyd, wanna come with me?”

“Anything to get me away from carrying you guys’ laundry,” The blonde replies, making a face at the clear container that he and Nya carried in a couple minutes back. Jay gasps dramatically and falls on his knees to pet the container.

“How _dare_ you. I have a great sense of fashion,” He pokes at Lloyd’s knee until the younger man moves away from his reach. Disappointed, he stands up to leave, dodging Kai coming in with two lamps in each hand. “Okay let’s get our butts moving.”

 

* * *

 

By the time they are done with dragging everything inside, the sky has already darken with clouds for the upcoming rainfall. Jay huffs, checking the watch on his wrist and grimacing at the dust and sweat clinging to him. It turns out they’ve spent an hour moving in, and another two trying to allocate all their items and furniture to their designated area. During the process, he has already gone upstairs to open the bedroom and bathroom doors and opened the windows to clear out the lingering mustiness.

Jay looks at Kai - who’s the definition of burnt out - dangling upside down from the couch they’ve placed in the common area. Zane seems to be fine, if anything quieter than usual from his perch on one of the unpacked boxes. Nya, Pixal, and Lloyd have already left half an hour ago. They still had classes to attend; he didn’t want them to stay when they had barely any food to eat and the showers haven’t been cleaned. He sits down next to Kai on the couch and absentmindedly plucks at his friend’s leg hair, making the other man yelp and kick him in return.

“I’m so tired. So hungry,” Kai groans, his face red from sitting upside down.

“We don’t have any food right now,” Jay complains as he tugs on Kai’s sock. He left his fidget cube back in one of the bags in the kitchen area and right now Kai’s stinky sock will do just fine as a temporary replacement. “Unless you want to eat instant noodles, again. I’m sick of that to be honest. Finally we can have a place for ourselves and we still haven’t gotten groceries.”

“No worries, I’m looking up restaurants nearby,” Zane speaks up from his corner where he’s been playing on his phone, “We can order a pizza or something. Where did we put our coffee table again?”

Kai reaches an unsteady arm out and gestures vaguely towards the kitchen. “It’s still in one of the boxes. Haven’t built it yet,” He mumbles, not particularly caring whether or not he will lose his sock to Jay’s roaming fingers. Jay pinches his skin when he fully removes the sock and Kai kicks him again.

“I thought you’re supposed to build it while we’re cleaning out the living room. I guess we’re just gonna have floor pizza, huh?” Jay scoffs, pinching Kai’s foot again before standing up from the couch. Kai makes a huffy noise and kicks Jay at the back of his legs.

“What kind of pizza do you want?” Zane asks them both, walking over to show the menu and options. “I’d like something with vegetables.”

“I want none with left beef,” Jay grins as Kai and Zane groans at his reference, “Come on! It’s a classic!”

“Can we get just one with a shit load of meat and veggies?” Kai rolls his legs down from the couch, effectively laying flat on the dirty wooden floor, “I’m _starving_. Listen to my belly. It sounds like a friggin’ dragon!”

“I’ll order two pizzas then, since I don’t want that much meat on mine,” Zane offers and Jay makes to wipe a nonexistent tear from his eye. Bless Zane’s heart, always the caretaker. “But since I’m doing that, someone should go and check the bathrooms and sinks. We should clean ourselves up. Kai, Jay?”

“I’ll do the laundry,” Jay pipes up, waving Kai’s sock in the air, “I’ve been sweating it up all day, and I would love to get out of these clothes right now. Kai should clean the bathrooms.”

“Why do I have to clean the bathrooms?” Kai protests, but then he takes a whiff of his armpit and blanches. “Okay, yeah, I’m gonna change, too. Here, take this. Also I left our dirty laundry basket up in your bedroom.” With that he proceeds to take off his sweaty shirt and throws it at Jay, who catches it with annoyance.

“You’re a nasty, nasty man, Kai Smith,” Jay says. Kai on the other hand has the audacity to laugh, even if his tan skin is more dirtied with him rolling on the floor all sweaty and sticky. Jay turns to Zane, ignoring Kai who’s becoming more gross by the second. “What about you, dude? Aren’t cha gonna throw your clothes like me like I’m the second coming of Cinderella?”

“It’s okay, I’ll do my own laundry,” Zane replies lightly. Bless his soul. “You should go check the upstairs’ bedroom, though. Kai really did leave our leftover laundry in your room.”

“Fine. I won't separate Kai's blacks from his colors then,” Jay sniffs and walks upstairs, ignoring his friend calling after him indignantly.

The atmosphere upstairs is a little colder, a little thicker with something he can’t quite place. When he went upstairs a little while back to open the doors and windows, the air was so musty that it was hard for him to breathe. He surveys the floor from where he stands. There’s a little balcony section that allows him to view the common area downstairs, and the old wood of the balcony gives him the impression it will break under too much pressure.

Behind the balcony is the hallway that branches off into two directions. Two bedrooms on one side to the right, and another bedroom with a bathroom to the left. Kai immediately claimed the one closest to the bathroom when he went upstairs for the first time, given the excuse that he tends to spend more time in the bathroom to do his hair. Zane prefers to live in a quieter place, far from noises of the shower or traffic, so he chose the one in the middle, sandwiched between Kai and the last room. That leaves the far left bedroom for Jay, one with windows facing the front yard, which honestly, he didn't mind.

He opens the door (plain white with a few knicks; he will repaint it later) and surveys his room. The boxes that cluttered the wooden floor made the room feel cramped. There's a medium sized closet, wire shelving taking up half the space inside and was opposite of the bed that was still bare of pillows and sheets. His eyes wander towards the window, where just under the sill sat the load of dirty laundry.

Jay sighs and goes to pick up the bag, nose wrinkling at the smell. It really was a bad idea to leave their laundry all piled up before they moved in, now that he thinks about it. As he walks about his room, something in the side of his peripheral catches his eye. Following it, he turns to see something bundled up and black in the corner of the room. Curious, he picks it up and unfurls it. It’s a plain black hoodie and besides the general dirtiness, it feels soft to the touch. He rubs his fingers on the fabric as he tries to think if any of them has a hoodie like this. Maybe Kai, but this hoodie is a couple sizes too big, and it looks like someone has left it here to gather dust for a while now. Regardless, it still looks new enough. He dumps the hoodie in with the rest of the laundry and continues to exit back down stairs where the washer and dryer would be.

By the time he’s arrived back in the living room, the rain has started to go down hard, blinding the view of the neighborhood from their windows (their windows, their door, their house, and Jay gets a little bit emotional). Zane has taken upon himself to bring out the coffee table and is looking through the instruction manual. Kai on the other hand can be heard blasting music while he’s scrubbing the toilet in the second bathroom by their kitchen.

The kitchen, despite it looking like any normal kitchen, happens to open towards the living room. Or at least to Jay, he assumes most kitchens look this way; the kitchen he grew up with inside his childhood trailer didn't qualify as one to him now. They don’t really have an area for a dining table, but they do have a nice island that can definitely work as one. The counter is covered with boxes and wrappers, and the cabinets haven’t been stocked yet. There’s a door to the right of the counter that leads towards a back room where the washer and dryer are. Further than that is another door that leads to the backyard, but Jay is content to stay inside for the night where it’s warm and bright.

When the laundry is loaded into the washer and Jay has gotten himself changed into a soft blue shirt and comfy pajama pants, Kai is also done with cleaning through the first bathroom. He walks out, smelling incredibly like bleach, and declares the room fit to use. Then he hobbles upstairs for the second one, leaving a chemtrail in his wake. Zane is still in the living room, surrounded by table parts, and looking incredibly focused for someone who’s holding two table legs like two drumsticks. Jay has an absent thought to remind Zane to change out of his dirty clothes, but he figures it’s better to have him finish building the table so he can carry all the fine sawdust with him to laundry afterwards.

“You need any help?” Jay asks quietly, not daring to break Zane’s concentration with loud noises. His friend only hums quietly in reply and starts screwing in some parts, his eyes still glued to the manual. He looks tired, actually, but he’s never been one to vocalize his feelings. It’s a bad habit that they’re trying to correct, so Jay leaves for the kitchen and comes back right after with a cup of water in hand. He nudges Zane’s shoulder and Zane finally looks up, blue eyes half lidded with fatigue.

“You should drink water,” Jay grins, “Stay hydrate and all that.”

“Ah, thank you, Jay,” Zane accepts the cup easily and goes to take steady sips. Jay settles down next to him and goes to read through the instruction manual instead, deft hands already picking through the mess of parts.

They both take turns putting things together and reading aloud the manual. Usually Jay would love to fill the air with aimless chatter, but after running his body ragged, he just wants to stick with some small talk, warm food, and a good shower afterwards.

The pizza comes when the coffee table is mostly assembled and Jay tips the delivery man nicely since the poor guy has probably been running around in the rain. Kai stumbles down just a bit after that, his shirt and pants soaked through after cleaning out the showers by himself. Jay feels a little bad since Kai’s been nothing but enthusiastic with moving and hauling heavy boxes. When they pass the pizza around, Jay lets Kai eat first. All three of them settle on the floor around their coffee table with no plates and a cup of water each. Even when Jay and Zane droops lightly over their respective meal, Kai still maintains a cheerful disposition. He lifts up his cup in the air and cheers through a mouthful of food.

“To our place!” He smiles wide and Jay feels fondness in his heart. He looks at Zane who also lifts up his cup to humor Kai. He looks at both of them and realizes he will have all the time in the world to get to know his best friends in this unfamiliar house they will soon call home.

Jay lifts up his cup as well, “To our place.”

 

* * *

 

Jay is the last to go and take a shower for the night. That’s rather fair, considering he was the one who did the least amount of physical work. On his way back to his room, he can hear Kai’s voice talking to Nya through the wall, boasting his independence from his family. Zane’s room on the other hand is silent, his friend having gone to bed early due to exhaustion. He sighs, feeling a bone deep tiredness stretching from his toes up to his neck. His shoulders and arms ache, and he can already hear his now prepared bed beckoning to him from behind his own door.

He opens his door and surveys the room once again. While Kai and Zane were taking their respective showers, Jay has busied himself with unpacking boxes and cleaning up parts of his room. His bed, now covered with nice fluffy blue sheets and three super soft pillows for extra comfort. The laundry has also been taken out and folded accordingly. He leaves the foreign black hoodie on a chair in the corner, right next to his new work desk, which in turn is right next to his bed. Jay flops onto his bed, groaning as his back pops. He can fall asleep right there, he thinks, blinking blearily at the window across from his bed. The sky is now clear from rain and the moon peaks gently from behind the cloud, casting his room in a soft blue tint.

Something moves in the corner of his eyes.

Jay sits up on his elbows, looking around wildly. It’s too early for this house to be haunted, he decides, feeling dread creep up his neck. Something moves again and he jumps, holding back a shriek. Right there from the perch of his chair, the black hoodie is moving and unfurling, as if there’s a mass that’s taking shape from inside. Jay shakes from where he’s sitting, watching with wide eyes as a person manifests from the hoodie, transparent green and backlit by moon light. He is big, bigger than Jay and Kai. His hair is shaggy and almost black in color. Jay looks down and he can’t see his feet.

“I can explain,” The ghost says.

Jay screams.


	2. caught in a never ending game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they stopped screaming after a bit, no worries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to update weekly, but next week I'll be entering a new job, so things might slow down. I'll try to keep it up, though!

“AAAAAAAOOOOH MY GOD HOLY SHIT!” Jay screams, scooting as far back from his bed as possible until his back hits the wall.

“No! No! Ssssh! I can explain!” The ghost raises his voice back, hands up in the air in a placating matter, but it’s all a trick, Jay thinks, a trick to get close to him so he can eat his soul! He floats slowly up to Jay and Jay screams even louder.

From outside of the hallway, he can hear doors slamming open and footsteps hurrying towards his direction. The ghost steps - no, floats - back, eyes darting around and mouth agape, trying to form words. Whatever he tries to say gets cut off when both Kai and Zane burst open the door of his room, both looking distinctively frazzled. The moment their eyes caught onto the ghostly frame of the man standing by his bed, they both let out similar screams for themselves.

Zane cuts his own scream short to take a big gulp of air, his protective instinct taking over when he reaches quickly towards Jay, snagging onto the sleeve of his shirt as if he’s doing his best to hold on for the both of them. Kai on the other hand keeps screaming as he bends down to pick up the nearest things to chuck at the ghost. Jay watches as a pair of socks, his book on Mechanical Engineering, a Rubik's cube, and an old pair of shorts are thrown one by one through the ghost, who shivers and hunches a little bit more each time the items ripple his form. One thing he notices is when the rubix cube lands against his hoodie, it bounces off like there’s a solid mass behind it.

“Guys, guys,” Zane tries to speak over Kai’s bellows of “BEGONE GHOST!”. He looks down at Jay, who has gone quieter and catches sight of his pale face and wide eyes. Zane turns back to Kai and tugs on his arm, forcing it down to the side. “Kai! Please stop! That’s enough.”

Kai drops the box of dice in his hand and swivels around, expression furious, “But the ghost! It can hurt us!”

“Look carefully, Kai,” Zane reminds him, and from where he sits, Jay is nodding along, too. The ghost is not doing anything to harm them (yet). He’s hunched over, arms up in protective positions over his face and ribs. He’s trying to make himself look even smaller and non-threatening, Jay realizes, and from Kai’s softening expression and Zane’s bright eyed recognition, it seems the others have noticed as well.

The ghost slowly straightens up, arms still raise to show that he doesn’t want to do no harm. “I just wanted to talk,” he says. His voice is husky, but there seems to be an unnatural undertone, as if he’s speaking through a layer of static, “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen people.”

“G-Ghosts aren’t real,” Jay mutters under his breath. Despite his fear, he slowly leans forward to take a closer look at the transparent man in front of him. “You can’t be real. Is this some sort of prank? Are there any 3D projectors hidden in this house?”

“I made sure there aren’t any,” Zane comments off to the side. He seems calm, but he’s clutching onto both Kai and Jay like they’re his lifeline.

“Guys, this is really freaky,” Kai whispers, though quite loudly, to both of his friends. He barely winces when Zane applies more pressure onto his arm as a warning. Instead he turns to the ghost, eyes narrowed in suspicion, “If you’re thinking of pulling any bullshit, I’ll personally step up to whoop your ass, is that clear?”

“As clear as I can be,” The ghost shrugs. Jay snorts involuntarily and the ghost grins, teeth flashing in the moonlight.

The room descends into awkward silence after that. Jay, Kai, and Zane exchange inquisitive glances at each other and at the ghost, who seems a little speechless as well. Frustrated with feeling out of place, and the dark is only making him more uncomfortable, Jay reaches over and turns on the light switch. Light floods the room and he flinches, blinking away the spots in his vision as his eyes adjust to the sudden brightness.

There the ghost still stands, dressed in his black hoodie. The light shines through him and yet it grounds him in this reality. Jay can see his features clearly now, from the thick, dark eyebrows he has to his downturned eyes, their dark colors muddied by the green ghostly effect. The ghost has a curved nose, almost Roman-esque, and his lips are pulled into a small frown. Even when he stands tall, almost as tall as Zane, and he really is rather big muscle-wise, the way he drops his head makes him look vulnerable, even a little shy, a little sad.

Jay absentmindedly thinks that he’s pretty cute, but quickly pushes that thought away. When he sneaks a glance at Kai and Zane, they both seem to be taking the ghost in as well. Zane’s eyebrows are raised high and Kai has a stubborn set to his jaw, though his cheeks are tinted pink.

“You really are a ghost,” Zane speaks up, leaving Kai’s side to do a full lap around the ghost who looks visibly uncomfortable, “How are you wearing this hoodie? And where does it come from anyway?”

“You guys know when Kai wanted me to do laundry and stuff?” Jay asks, fiddling with his blanket, “Well, I kinda picked up this hoodie that was gathering dust in my room and put it in the washer, too. Along with our clothes.”

“Oh, great, you saw a strange piece of clothing and decided to wash it along with my laundry?” Kai grouches, flailing his arms in the air, “Now we have ghost cooties on our clothes! Thanks, Jay!”

“Well I didn’t know it would be a ghost thing!” Jay snaps back.

“I don’t have ghost cooties,” The ghost speaks up, cutting the argument short, “And this hoodie is the only remaining link I have to the world of the living. I need it to manifest a visible body.”

“What do you mean the hoodie being the only link you have to this world?” Zane asks, tugging on the ghost’s sleeve. The ghost quickly snatches it away, cradling the hoodie like it’s something precious.

“I’ll tell you, but...,” The ghost sighs, looking around. He lingers his eyes by the window almost longingly, before turning back to Jay and his friends, “Sit down. It’s a long story, and I can’t remember most of it.”

“But first, I’ll introduce myself,” the ghost’s lips quirk up into a little smile, “My name’s Cole, and I’ve been ‘dead’ for over a year.”

 

* * *

 

“I was a living and breathing person, just like you guys, before this happened,” Cole starts when they all settle down in Jay’s bedroom. Kai and Jay are now sharing his bed, with Kai hugging Jay’s pillow sleepily while Jay lays on his stomach, facing Cole. Zane takes up Jay’s bean bag in the corner, his hands folded together as he concentrates on Cole. Cole, surprisingly enough, can sit, and he’s currently taking up space on Jay’s chair.

“Isn’t it obvious to have a body before you’re a ghost though?” Kai asks, voice muffled by the pillow.

“Well, I didn’t technically die. I was tricked,” Cole replies, lowering his head. He fidgets on the sleeve of his hoodie, and from Jay’s angle he can see Cole’s jaw clenching up as though he’s steeling himself for the rest of the story.

“I remember moving to this place over a year ago. I don’t remember why I did, but I thought maybe I was looking for a house I could call home. I didn’t know it was already haunted,” Cole says, clenching his fists unconsciously.

“Wait, there’s another ghost in here?” Zane asks, expression worried. Cole shakes his head.

“Not anymore, he was the one who tricked me into taking his place. There was a scroll or something that I found in the house, and at first I didn’t think much of it, but then this old man appeared to me one night. He said his name was Yang, that he was trapped and said the scroll was his only physical link to the world,” Cole’s voice starts to crack with anger, “He told me he just wanted to see his family again. He said he was cursed, and only I could help him by giving him the touch of a living person. I was fooled.”

“What happened?” Jay’s voice is barely above a whisper.

Cole shakes his head and wipes his eyes, but when he pulls away there aren’t any tears.

“Everything becomes murky afterwards. I remember a summoning circle? The instructions were verbally given. I remember him telling me to give him something of mine, hence this,” He gestures over his hoodie, “I was a substitute to his curse. Instead of just freeing him, he took away my life. I remember waking up and he was alive and I was not. He told me he was the one who cursed himself and to break free from it he used me as a replacement. So now I’m here. I’ve been here and I can’t remember who I was before all of this.”

“What do you mean?” Kai asks, leaning forward with interest.

“The curse was suppose to give him immortality, he said he wanted to be remembered forever. He fucked up and-“ Cole chokes on a sob, but his eyes remain dry. “The curse backfired. It erases a person from life entirely. Their life, their memories, and the memories of them. He erased me from the world so thoroughly that if there were people who knew me, there aren’t any now. I can barely remember myself. I just know that my name is Cole, I’ve been here for over a year, and maybe at one point I was someone’s son or somebody else’s friend. That’s my story.”

Cole concludes, smiling at them humorlessly. His face is now carefully blank, but his jaw is clenching and unclenching as he puts in effort to not show his emotions. He’s also clutching onto the hoodie like it’s his lifeline. They all now understand that it literally is.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you,” Jay says after a moment of silence. His throat feels heavy with unspoken feelings. Next to him, Kai shifts closer and leans a leg against his own, the warm weight providing him small comfort.

“It’s fine, you didn’t do anything. It was my fault that I walked right into his trap,” Cole replies. He slouches further into the chair, his eyes gazing at distant memories. “I had enough time to think about it. From how to break the curse to just trying to cope with being like _this_ , I’m just tired of trying to find a way out. At least now you guys are here, I’m glad to have company.”

Just from those words, Kai is already up on his hands and knees, ready to say otherwise. However, Zane beats him to it, standing up from his seat on the bean bag.

“No! You mustn’t give up! There has to be another way!” He says. His eyes are bright with unshed tears and the way his eyebrows furrowed together just hardens his face even further. “I’m sorry you’ve been through this terrible isolation for so long, but it doesn’t have to be that way forever. Trust me,” his voice softens at the end, “I understand.”

“Zane’s right,” Kai says, voice firm. All heads swivel to his direction. “We can do something about this. We can look for this Yang guy and drag him back here, and then we’re gonna kick his ass. You don’t deserve this sort of fate. It wasn’t your choice to be this way.”

“But how are we going to do that?” Jay asks, turning towards Kai, “Cole, I’m really sorry this happened to you, but we’re just college students dealing with some supernatural voodoo shit! I don’t even know if it- if it has corruptive powers!”

“What do you mean, corruptive powers?” Cole asks, glaring at Jay in a way that makes him sweat nervously.

“Well, it’s evil magic, right? I just- I don’t know if you’re telling the truth. Because like you said, he tricked you using your sympathy! I don’t want to be turned into a ghost. I don’t want Kai or Zane to die either!” Jay replies, fingers clenching around his blanket.

“I didn’t ask for your help, did I?” Cole snaps back.

“Well, you didn’t-“

“Then it shouldn’t be a problem!” Cole’s voice raises as he stands up at the same time, “The world’s already forgotten about me! I can’t even remember my last name! I’d rather take that than put anyone else through the same experience that I had! At one point, maybe I might even consider it, but I’m done with this. Maybe wishing for a chance to be back will never work and I’ve accepted this fate. I will not be like Yang!”

“We don’t want you to be,” Zane says, laying a hand on Cole’s arm. Jay blinks, just now recognizing that Zane has been making a steady walk towards an enraged Cole, and now he stands close enough to touch him. Cole himself is also shocked to silence, his eyes zeroed in on where Zane’s hand makes contact with his hoodie.

“Despite Jay’s doubts, and to be honest, I’m still trying not think that this is only a weird dream, I- _we_ ,” he gestures at Kai’s direction, “We want to help. I don’t know you yet, and you don’t know us, but maybe us meeting here is a chance for you to search for the life you’ve left behind.”

“I can probably look you up on Facebook,” Kai grins. Jay glances up at him, feeling betrayed by his best friend. Kai rolls his eyes back at him, “Oh come on, this is some exciting stuff. I’m sorry I threw Jay’s stuff at you, but you seem to be a pretty cool guy. Even if you’re a secret douchebag, I don’t think anybody should be subjected to this weird death limbo. Besides, I know a person who knows a person who knows the occult. Maybe they can help?”

“You mean, _him_?” Jay asks, making a face.

“Would you rather him than actually trying to look for a voodoo madman with enough power to curse a person into forgotten ghostly life?” Kai shoots back, frowning hard at Jay, who finally gives into his defeat.

“Fine. I’ll do it. I’ll join in on the help,” Jay says, looking back at Cole, “But as soon as things get dangerous, I’m outtie.”

“You-“ Cole swivels his head around, looking at Zane, Kai, and Jay. He swallows and clenches his fists, but he looks less agitated than before, “You guys shouldn’t do this. Not for a stranger like me.”

“Well, we have time to get to know you,” Kai grins at him.

“And we would love to get to know you better,” Zane says, gently letting go of Cole’s sleeve and stepping back to give him more space. Cole seems to move with him for a moment, as if he’s missing the contact. Jay watches as he stands up straighter, and for the first time in this eventful and eventually emotionally draining night, he really sees Cole smile.

“Thank you guys,” Cole says, eyes twinkling with mirth and hope. When he smiles wide, his face softens up completely and Jay notices that he has very faint dimples on his cheeks.

Something about the sight makes his heart hurts.

That night, all of them go to bed with heavy hearts. Jay hesitates on asking for Cole to leave his room, but when he does Cole simply acknowledges that and floats out of the door. Kai and Zane linger back by his bed before leaving just to check on each other’s emotional comfort level. Jay is an anxious mess; his mind won’t stop thinking of worst case scenarios after Zane and Kai have offered to help the stranger in their home. Kai is more accepting of the situation, and Jay can’t help but feel jealous of his open-minded way of thinking. Zane is more careful, but he seems to want to help as well. Jay can’t deny either of them. If they think that this is something of importance, he trusts them.

 

* * *

 

Morning comes quietly to their household. Gentle streams of light peek through the blinds Jay has neglected to close the night before, shining rays of warmth over the room and stretching out to reach where he lays tangled in his bed. He yawns and rolls over to the side, one arm stretching out to reach for his phone, which has been placed on his bedside table the night before. He grasps blindly for it for a moment before out of frustration sitting up on his elbows to get a better vantage point. The movement shakes away the last few dregs of sleep and he blinks away the blur in his eyes to focus on the screen.

7 AM.

He flops back onto bed with a sigh, draping an arm over his eyes to cover them from the sunlight. He wishes he had slept better, considering last night. Last night. Last-

Jay jolts back up and rolls out of bed, dragging his cover with him. He stumbles a little in the process as he gets tangled up in the fabric, but he recovers quickly enough. From where he kneels on the floor, surrounded by cover and pillows and socks and Rubik's cube, he can see the empty space on the chair by his table. The black hoodie from yesterday has disappeared. It was not a dream. Everything that happened last night was not a dream and he met an actual _ghost_ and he talked to him and his name was Cole and _there’s a ghost in his house_.

With that revelation, Jay immediately stands up and runs out of his bedroom. He runs past Kai’s room and opens the door of the bathroom, but there’s no ghost there. Shrugging it off, he makes his way downstairs, socks slipping slightly when he accidentally speed up halfway down. Once he finally enters the common area, there’s nobody there either. Kai and Zane still have not woken up so besides his sharp breathing, the entire house is silent.

He slows down by the couch in the living room and gathers up the discarded pizza boxes, making a note to stock up on groceries. He checks around the coffee table, thinking that maybe Cole is just playing around and trying to hide from them as a prank. Even though the ghost was very nice to all of them, he still doesn’t know if he should fully trust him yet.

The kitchen area is not the same as yesterday. There are still unpacked boxes full of kitchenware and dry food. The fridge has been left untouched from yesterday since none of them has had the time to do a deep clean for any spaces in the kitchen. However the counter is cleared from miscellaneous scraps and trash from when they moved in, and it seems someone has taken out an old rag to do a full wipe down for the counter and kitchen island. The surface shines under the sunlight and as he makes his way around the kitchen island, he notices a single stool out of place. On the seat is the black hoodie, and right on top is a note, hastily scrawled on with a sharpie. The handwriting is shaky, as if the person has not written in a long time. He scans it over, comforted that he can still read the words.

_I hope you guys don’t mind me cleaning up this place for you. I will reappear by sunset. I don’t have energy to fully form myself when the sun rises. Don’t worry about me. Have fun unpacking._

__\- Cole_ _

Jay leaves the note on the kitchen island and gingerly picks up the hoodie. It’s cool to the touch and the fabric is still soft like yesterday. He wonders if Cole could feel it when he manifested in it, or if he was just like air filling up the space he was given, a being without form or mass, and if the sense of touch has eluded him ever since he turned into a ghost. Jay shakes his head. He doesn’t want to deal with philosophical questions so early in the morning. Instead, he folds the hoodie carefully and sets it on the couch in the living room. Somehow he thinks it’s better for Cole to come back in a better seating situation. Small comforts, he supposes.

By the time Kai has woken up and dragged his ass downstairs, Jay has already taken it upon himself to clean out the cabinets in the kitchen. Kai literally catches him kneeling on the counter as he tries to dust off the top of the cabinets.

“Don’t even think about it,” Jay snaps at him from his perch on the counter when Kai opens his mouth.

“Local gremlin climbs counter to find lost height,” Kai replies, voice wobbly with unheard laughter. Jay throws the feather duster at him and he catches it mid air. Curse Kai and his stupidly amazing hand-eye coordination. He’s not allowed to be this reflexive when he just woke up like half an hour ago.

“Just shut up and help me with this,” Jay sniffs, sliding down from the counter, “We still need to clean out the fridge. I’m gonna start unpacking our bowls and stuff.”

“Where’s Cole?” Kai asks, taking a stool to stand on top of it as he gladly take over Jay’s dusting job.

Jay shrugs, passing along Cole’s note to Kai who reaches down to accept it. Kai murmurs the note under his breath as he reads, and once he’s done he returns it to Jay with raised eyebrows.

“He disappears by sunrise? Isn’t that kind of a vampire thing to only operate at night?” He asks, turning back to focus on cleaning.

“I dunno. He said in the note that he doesn’t have enough energy to manifest a visible form? Is it part of the curse?” Jay replies. The lid of the cardboard box is stubborn under his blunt fingernails and he cusses softly when the corner of the box scratches against his skin. “Do you have your Swiss Army knife on you?”

“What do you think?” Kai turns fully back to Jay, “I’m in my pajamas.”

Indeed he is. Jay looks over his red t-shirt and flame patterned boxer shorts and shrugs, “I guess I’ll use my keys.”

By the time Jay and Kai have cleared out the cabinets and started on organizing their kitchenware, Zane finally arrives downstairs. Despite his rumpled appearance in plaid pajama pants and a faded white t-shirt, he’s bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as he talks rapidly over the phone with Pixal.

“Morning Zane,” Jay and Kai chorus from their respective positions in the kitchen. Jay is surrounded by bowls and plates while Kai is carrying a box full of utensils.

“Good morning, Jay, Kai,” Zane smiles at them before turning back to his conversation with Pixal. “Yes, yes, Pixal says good morning to you guys, too. Oh, when? This afternoon?” He frowns a little, “Well, we did ask you guys to come, and I don’t want to rearrange our time slots again. I know you’ve been busy but- I see. I’ll tell the others to prepare then. Thanks, Pixal. See you soon.”

“What’s up, dude?” Kai asks when Zane enters the kitchen area, still holding onto his phone and typing some things out.

“Pixal wants us to confirm when we want her to bring Lloyd and Nya over to help us clean the house and finish unpacking. Since today’s Saturday, it’s easier for them to schedule out a time. I should’ve made note of it because I totally forgot they’re coming over,” Zane answers, looking up from his phone. He looks around then, and blinks at his friends, “Where’s Cole?”

“Apparently ghosts can’t appear visibly when the sun’s up,” Jay casually answers, passing the note to Zane, who reads it readily.

“I see. How disappointing, I wish we could’ve talked to him more,” Zane frowns at the note before setting it aside, “How are we going to explain to the others about this?”

“About Cole?” Kai asks.

“Oh yeah,” Jay sucks in a breath through his teeth, “The others are coming over, aren’t they? Should we tell them about it today?”

Zane stares blankly at him, before shrugging, “Perhaps it would be a better idea to wait for Cole to appear again. We should have his consent after all.”

Just by that line, a gust of wind blows through the kitchen, gently ruffling up their hair. Zane can feel a presence by his side and right away a sense of doubt mixed with hope blooms in his chest involuntarily. He gasps and turns around, but nobody’s there.

“Did you feel that?” He looks back at his friends, both of whom nod vigorously. Kai runs a hand through his hair to keep it from his face. Jay looks shocked, his grip on a bundle of spoon slacking slightly.

“The window isn’t open,” Jay manages out, “That was spooky as hell.”

“I think we have our answer,” Kai grins, looking around the kitchen, “Cole, wherever you are, we’re gonna help you, dude.”

Another gentle breeze ruffles Kai’s hair and he laughs out loud, startled, “That’s definitely a yes.”


	3. and all the courage I had let start to mildew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kai wonders a lot about the decision he's made now that he's faced with reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a beta reader @Tododorky on AO3. You should definitely check them out! They have a lot of amazing fics, and I especially love their Miritama content for BNHA.  
> I'm sorry that this chapter has taken too long to write. I'm still trying to get use to my job and the amount of hours I work per week is staggering. I'll still keep this up, though!

When the rest of their group, consisting of Nya, Lloyd, and Pixal arrived, it was already 9:45 in the morning. Kai had changed out of his sleepwear into his usual red hoodie with jeans. He makes sure to shave too, because Nya’s teased him too many times over his patchy beard. His sister comes barreling into the house first, not hesitating for a moment to ring the doorbell or even knock, and he greets her with a big hug in return.

“It’s been 25 years since I last saw you guys.” He grins at Nya and goes to hug Lloyd as well. Pixal as always politely decline his embrace, so he gives her a firm handshake instead.

“More like since yesterday.” Nya laughs as she bends over to untie her boots. “How’re you guys handling the new place? I see you’ve already set up some stuffs.”

“Eh, we managed.” He shrugs. From behind the kitchen Jay pops up and goes to greet everyone. Zane emerges from the upper level and joins in as well. Both of them are also wearing new clothes; Jay in a comfy blue plaid button up and cargo shorts, and Zane in a simple white tee and jeans. 

“Don’t listen to what he says.” Jay says conspiringly to Lloyd. “He forgot to build our coffee table so we had to eat on the floor.” 

“Whaaat? Kai, that’s gross!” Lloyd laughs. “But I guess it’s better than eating cup noodles on the floor. Now that’s something I’d like to experience again just for the heck of it.”

“I believe we have agreed that instant noodle is extremely unhealthy and lacks any nutritional value for our diet.” Zane replies on the side. “Hi guys! Hi, Pixal!” With that he pulls her into a hug. She only accepts those from Zane, and no matter how much Kai tries she doesn’t take hugs from anybody else except Zane and sometimes Nya. 

“Jay’s exaggerating. Zane built the coffee table so we did have a surface to eat on. Also  _ I _ was the one who had to clean both bathrooms.” Kai fake pouts, but he drops it right after. “Come in, guys, let’s get busy with - well - everything. We spent the entire morning cleaning out the cabinets and…” He trails off, eyebrows furrowing. As much as he boasts about getting things done for Cole, he doesn’t know how to break the news to his sister and his friends. Nya is fearless, but he’s seen Lloyd cry on a Halloween carnival ride before. Pixal is a mystery, but she seems unphased by most things.

“And what?” Lloyd asks, gazing at him with his innocent green eyes. Kai hesitates and turns back to Jay and Zane, both of whom send him questioning glances.

“Aaand we forgot to stock our fridge!” Kai exclaims, separating himself from the group and snatching onto Jay and Zane’s sleeves to pull them to the direction of the kitchen. Nya and Lloyd’s surprised exclamations are disregarded, but Kai quickly deflects them with an excuse. “It’s some embarrassing guy stuff. We just want to make sure what we need so we can buy it all later. You don’t want to shop for men’s undies, now, do you, sis?”

“Okay, ew.” Nya deadpans. Kai ushers Jay and Zane to a huddle by the fridge.

“What’s up?” Zane asks once they’re out of hearing range. Jay, on the other hand, looks a little miffed. A chatterbox like him wouldn’t appreciate being taken out of the conversation, but Kai had more important things to worry about. 

“Lloyd doesn’t like ghosts.” Kai replies, dead serious. Jay snorts.

“Tch, yeah, who doesn’t?” He mutters under his breath. Kai shoots him a dirty look and he shrugs.

“Is this something of extreme concern? Perhaps we can talk it through with him.” Zane tilts his head inquisitively. Usually it would make Kai smile, but he doesn’t feel like it right now.

“No, I mean he’s  _ really _ afraid of ghosts. Remember back when he had a nervous breakdown when we were watching The Ring?” Kai peeks a look at the person in question. Lloyd is just chatting with the girls, unknowing of what’s to come. “Listen, I’ve come up with a plan. I’ll take Lloyd and Nya out for groceries, you guys hang back and just unpack stuff. Don’t say anything about Cole yet, I’ll try and break the news for Lloyd first.”

Jay and Zane both frown at this. When Lloyd was introduced to them a long time ago as an apprentice in their dojo, they didn’t think much of him except the fact that he was their instructor’s nephew. After a while, they all quickly warmed up to him as the baby of the group. Much to Kai’s begrudging acknowledgement, the group tends to be a tad over protective of Lloyd. But that’s a story of the past. Jay and Zane know how much Kai cares about Lloyd and his emotional wellbeing. After some consideration, Zane finally gives Kai his approval.

“Well, you  _ do _ know him best.” Zane amends. He’s calmed Lloyd through a panic attack before, so he knows how devastating they can be. “We’ll handle things back here. I’ll come up with a list of things we need to get, too.”

“And I’ll keep everybody distracted.” Jay smiles, wagging his brows. “If there’s anyone who Lloyd loves the most, it’s you, dude. It’s kind of unfair how he clearly favors you over any of us, but I get it.”

“Thanks guys, you’re the best!” Kai wipes away his fake tears before pulling them into a tight hug. Jay makes a choking noise, but he always exaggerates, so Kai keeps both him and a compliant Zane up in the air with his hold. After a couple seconds, he releases them and pats both of their shoulders. “Well, text me the list before we get to the store. Eyo sis! Let’s go shopping!”

“Cool, I’m not buying underwear for you old men!” Nya shouts back as she stands up from the couch, where she’s been sitting while Kai did his group huddle.

“Lloyd, you’re coming with! We need a fellow packing mule!” Kai orders as he shoves his necessary items into his pocket. Key, phone, wallet, all present and accounted for.

“Aww, do I  _ have _ to? I already helped you carry stuff yesterday!” Lloyd groans, his shoulders sloping down with faked tiredness.

“Yeah, and I carried my things and _unpacked_ them.” Kai comes by and ruffles his hair. It’s a habit that has developed since they were kids and it’s one that sticks with them throughout all these years. Lloyd sighs, but smiles at the gesture. Kai smiles back. “Come on little bro, come on sis. Let’s head out.”

“Alright.” Lloyd moves to follow along. Nya’s already putting her shoes back on by the door, the car key jingling by her belt loop.

“You guys are so slow.” She comments as they make their way out. Kai stops by the door and turns back to look at the house members.

“Any requests for groceries?” He asks. Pixal immediately perks up. She’s been typing furiously on her phone for a while now, and when she turns the screen around, he can see from their distance what looks to be a list.

“I’ve been writing a list this entire time. I checked the house yesterday already, and it seems you guys are low on toilet paper on other hygienic items. I’ll send it to you once the list is done.” She smiles amiably.

“We can always count on you, huh, Pix?” Kai laughs and does a finger salute.

“Who else will keep you boys in check?” Pixal shoots back. Behind her, Zane slowly raises up his arm. “Zane, you tried to plant  _ weed  _ in your dorm once. It was not even the good kush.” Zane lowers his arm.

“Bye guys! Get bacon!” Jay yells from the kitchen. “Oh, and engine oil!”

“We’re not getting engine oil from a grocery store!” Nya shouts back and quickly pushes Kai and Lloyd out the door. “Damn, you guys just had to keep talking. And here I thought Misako was the housewife.”

“She wasn’t.” Lloyd deadpans as they make their way to Nya’s sleek red sports car. 

“Shit you’re right.” Nya replies, opening the car door and strapping in on her driver’s seat. Kai follows suit, calling shotgun while Lloyd doesn’t bother arguing over it and goes straight to backseat. He props his legs up on the seat next to him, but one glare from Nya through her rearview mirror has him obediently putting his legs down.

Kai watches him wordlessly and wonders what he’s getting into.

 

* * *

 

The grocery store is just an ordinary chain store, where the parking lot is almost full of family vehicles and it takes forever to find a good spot. It’s only five minutes from the suburban area where Kai lives, and a little further for Nya, Lloyd, and Pixal. Nya parks the car with smooth expertise, a testament to her skill with vehicles since she was a young teen. Kai hops out and stretches his limbs languidly, while Lloyd heads immediately to the nearest abandoned shopping cart. They fall into a small group with Lloyd being the cart pusher. The noise of the wheels is a little grating, but it barely bothers Kai anymore.

By the time they arrived at the store, Pixal had sent Kai a comprehensive list of goods they wanted to get and a couple messages about Jay almost getting electrocuted while plugging in the fridge. Kai tells Nya and Lloyd about it, and after all three of them stop laughing at Jay’s predicament, Kai makes a note on getting a first aid kit and a fire extinguisher. 

“So what do you guys need first?” Nya asks while they’re still loitering near the flower shop by the entrance. Kai checks through his phone again and scratches his head at the long list. It’s going to make a dent in his bank account, but he hasn’t been working his butt off for nothing.

“Well, there are veggies, which are definitely the more expensive items on the list. I’ll send you the document just in case. We can split up to make things easier.” He says, immediately forwarding the text to Nya. “Lloyd and I can handle the frozen and meat section. Can you pick up the veggies? And then…” He looks around the store to find a sign that’s going to be their marker. “We can meet up by the hygienic products once we’re done.”

“Sure, that sounds like a good idea.” Nya answers easily. Lloyd has already preoccupied himself with looking at fruits, but at the mention of his name he perks up and moves over to where Kai’s standing.

“We’re just splitting up to cover more grounds.” Kai explains to Lloyd.

“Oh, okay.” Lloyd shrugs. “Do you need a basket, Nya?”

“I can handle it.” She smiles, lifting up an arm and flexing. A nearby young lady ogles at her, but quickly turns away when Nya starts heading to the vegetable aisle. Both Lloyd and Kai snickers quietly at that.

“So, what did you want to talk to me about?” Lloyd asks once they embark on their own journey to the frozen food section. Kai jolts at the question, not expecting for him to catch on so quickly.

“What do you mean?” He laughs nervously and takes out the grocery list on his phone, hoping that not making eye contact with Lloyd will keep him from being suspicious.

“You’re being suspicious, Kai.” Lloyd swipes the phone from his hand and turns fully to face Kai. “Usually you would beg for Nya to come with you, or  _ any _ of the guys, actually. You’re the type to keep everyone in the group just so it makes shopping more fun, but today you split up the group. What’s up?”

“You are one smart kid.” Kai grins, surrendering under Lloyd’s acidic stare. He quickly slings his arm around Lloyd’s shoulders and pull him into a noogie. “You got me, Lloyd. I’m just gonna miss you so much now that we’re living further away from you and the dojo. I’m so far away we can’t hang out as much anymore, and you’re a grown man, too.” He ruffles Lloyd’s hair. “I keep remembering how much of a squirt you used to be. Now you’re taller than Jay.” 

Kai mentally high-fives himself at the good save. His voice barely wavers, and it seems he has tricked Lloyd into thinking he’s in his protective big bro mode right now. Lloyd dislodges himself from Kai’s arms and pulls away, face burning at the public display of noogies. 

“Everybody’s taller than Jay.” He replies, opening a nearby fridge to check on frozen waffles. Kai watches Lloyd’s shoulders as they slowly relax, and when he turns around with a couple boxes in tow, he seems calmer, though his cheeks are still pink. “And thanks, I guess. I’m gonna miss you guys, too. It’s gonna be less chaotic without you guys coming over everyday just to play around. We used to go on all sorts of adventures, so I guess that sort of thing is behind us now.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Kai shrugs off the lingering feeling of melancholy and takes over pushing the cart. “The dojo was like a second home for us for a very long time, but now we’re almost out of college, so we just gotta start making room for others, ya know?”

“I understand.” Lloyd sighs noisily through his nose and returns Kai’s phone. Kai accepts it readily, and both of them fall into companionable silence as they slowly check off their grocery list. Unbeknownst to Lloyd however, Kai is still nervous about breaking the ghost news. By the time they’re done with the deli area, Kai pulls the cart over in a secluded corner and takes a deep breathe. Lloyd bumps into him and quickly steps back, but his apology dies on his tongue when Kai turns around to face him, expression serious.

“How’s Morro?” Kai asks and just like that Lloyd’s expression falls.

“Getting better. We started talking more after Uncle Wu finally handed over the dojo to me.” Lloyd raises his eyebrow. “Why are you asking?”

“Are you still deadly afraid of ghosts?” Kai pushes, but immediately feels bad when Lloyd flinches.

“No. Yeah. Maybe, why?” Lloyd narrows his eyes. “Why ask about Morro and ghosts? You know what he did to me back when I was just a teen.”

“He locked you in a haunted house to hang out with his gang instead of taking care of you.” Kai remembers it clearly. Lloyd was traumatized, and even after that Morro used that knowledge to blackmail and bully him to do awful things. Kai gets angry every time he remembers it, how he and his friends stepped in a little too late. It was only thanks to Nya who really stepped up that Lloyd was finally out of their control. “He hurt you deeply. And I know that having him as a family member is hard and you are the bravest kid to finally stand up to him and Wu.”

“Yeah.” Lloyd snorts, but he doesn’t seem humored. “My family is all sorts of messed up.”

“And the reason I ask about him is-” Kai takes a deep breath and watches as Lloyd perks up to listen. “I- we - me and the guys, need his help with something.”

“You need Morro to help you? For what?” Lloyd’s hand is subconsciously tightening its hold on the cart’s handle.

“There’s - there’s a g-”

“I can’t believe you had me running around in the store like that! You didn’t see my texts, and now you’re just standing in the corner gossiping like a couple of old ladies!” Nya bursts in, carrying a basket of fresh fruits and veggies with her. Her other hand clutches her phone and the look on her face can send men hurling into storms. “Honestly, Kai, Lloyd, are you even done with your shopping?”

“Sorry, Nya!” Lloyd turns back to Kai and smiles apologetically. “We can talk later about this, yeah?”

“Uhm, sure.” Kai stutters out and moves along as Nya grabs him by the arm and drags him to one of the cashier booths. He can’t help but feel disappointment weighing in his guts. At the same time, there’s an uncertainty as well. Maybe he can keep this away from Lloyd for a while, but at the same time he doesn’t want to lie to his friends at all. Morro is such a sensitive topic to their group, and Cole seems to be doing fine. It was Kai who insisted to help after all, but now he starts to second guess himself on his abilities to do the right thing. Jumping into the world of the supernatural seems cool at first, but at what cost? He looks at Nya and Lloyd who are quietly making fun of the gossip magazines by the register and hopes that they can accept the brash decision he will make.

 

* * *

 

The car ride home is filled with the usual banter between Nya and Lloyd. At one point, he wants to speak up and explain to them what has been weighing in his mind, but he can’t seem to force the topic into any of the conversations they’re having. It seems that Nya has noticed his awkwardness, too, but she might have gotten the wrong idea and instead just keeps talking to cover his silence. While she’s distracted with driving, however, Kai has already sent a couple texts to Jay and Zane, alerting them that he has not managed to talk to Lloyd about the ghost.

At the end, they all agree that maybe it’s better to keep it from him for a while just so that they can take their time to settle into the new place. Of course, Nya and Pixal should be informed as soon as possible to soften the blow when time comes.

By the time their car pulls up to the driveway, it’s already an hour past noon. On their way back they have stopped by at a fast food drive through to let lunch for the entire group and Kai can smell the delicious fried chicken bucket from the front of the car. However, he doesn’t feel so much appetized as he feels a wriggling nervousness in his stomach. The feeling perpetuates even when he helps Nya and Lloyd haul in their groceries through the front door. It settles heavily still when Zane, Jay, and Pixal greet them with a nicely cleaned kitchen and the whole group chatters among each other about cleaning and eating.

When Zane and Jay give him worrying glances, the feeling sinks straight through his gut.

“You okay, dude?” Jay asks, leaning on the counter where Kai’s unpacking their lunches. Kai glances around and barely misses Lloyd’s eyes on him.

“Yeah, no. Maybe.” Kai sighs. “I feel weird. Usually I’m all for adventures and shit, and having a supernatural entity in our house is cool and I really wanna help, but this time I feel like second guessing myself.”

“What do you mean?” Jay frowns, his hand wandering to grab some stray fries. “You were super gung ho about it last night, and even this morning you were excited, too.”

“It’s just...” Kai tears through a paper bag rather noisily. “We’re grown ups, Jay. I just realize that today when I was talking to Lloyd. We’re not gonna be around to protect him, and Jay,” Kai laughs, “Lloyd’s a grown up, too. I don’t know if we should get ourselves into another adventure again. Don’t you think we’ve had enough?”

His question met complete silence. He looks up to find Jay staring at him with wide eyes, his mouth opening and closing like a fish. If Kai is better at reading emotions on others’ faces, he would guess that Jay looks like Kai has trashed his Lego Star Wars set. Jay looks pissed.

Kai finds out that he is pissed, because as soon as Jay gets his bearing, he punches Kai right in the shoulder.

“Ow, what the fuck, man?” Kai yelps, because even if Jay is smaller than anybody in their group, he was still one of the best students in their dojo and has a surprisingly mean right hook.

“Who are you and what have you done with Kai?” Jay grinds back, not bothering to hide his volume from the curious ears of their friends. “The Kai I know never gives up. He would not back down from a challenge and he will always be there to lend a hand to someone in need. I agreed to this because I know that having you on the team will push us to success, even if this whole thing is bullshit.”

“But this is something we’ve never encountered before.” Kai protests, and from the corner of his eyes he can see Nya and the others looking at him concernedly.

“So was that time we had to deal with Morro! Or the twins!” Jay snaps. “Every time there will be things we have never done or seen, so is this any different?”

“What are you guys talking about?” Pixal asks, crossing her arms. Besides her Zane looks decidedly nervous.

“You’ve been acting weird all day, Kai.” Lloyd makes his way closer to where Kai and Jay are standing, and besides him, Nya nods along.

“Yeah, bro-bro. What’s wrong? You need any help?” Nya asks and the look on her face makes Kai want to look away.

“Yeah, but not from us.” Lloyd grumbles. “At the supermarket, he asked me about Morro. He wants Morro to help him with something.”

At that, both Nya and Pixal gasp. While Pixal is surprised, Nya is outraged because she was the one who had to deal with Morro and his gang the most.

“ _ WHAT _ ? Kai! Jay!” Nya shouts, stomping her way over to both guys, who flinch under her anger. “ _ What _ is the meaning of this? What’s so important that you’re soughting after Morro instead of us? Don’t you trust us? Is it because now you’re officially away from us you think you’re gonna let us go just like that?”

“Come on, sis.” Kai protests weakly. “It’s not what you think!”

“Then you better explain it right now!” His sister shouts back, crossing her arm and staring down at her brother and her best friend.

“I, we, uh…” Kai answers, hands tightening around a poor paper bag that he picked up earlier on. By his side, Jay is stunned silent, though Kai can see him visibly sweating under the warm light of their kitchen.

“We have a case of a haunted house.” Zane speaks up from where he’s standing, and all eyes are on him. “Our house, to be exact. There’s a ghost living here. His name is Cole, and he needs our help.”


	4. how I hated lifeless world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> communication, communication, communication

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm moving onto a bigger client-based project in the company I'm working for. Unfortunately it took out a lot of my energy, so I'm immensely proud that I was able to finish this chapter. This is a longer chapter than usual, too! Please enjoy it ^_^

The moment Zane declares that their house is haunted, Kai swears he can hear his stomach drop with the silence that follows. And then chaos ensues. Kai launches himself over the kitchen island and barely catches his balance tugging on Zane’s shirt collar. Despite the confused and worried exclamations from his friend, he still hauls himself up, the force of it pulling Zane’s down to his eye level. Pixal makes an offended noise next to him and goes to push Kai away from her best friend.

“Kai, what are you doing?” Pixal says, hands tight around the fabric of his shirt. Zane is not dissuaded, staring back at Kai with icy blue eyes.

“Zane, what the hell!?” Kai snaps at his friend. “I thought we agreed on not telling everybody until I can break the news with Lloyd!”

Before he can do anything else, Kai can feel himself being bodily pulled back by Pixal, his shirt stretching around his body until he almost can’t breathe. As his grip on Zane wavers, Jay sneaks up from behind him and hooks his arms around his body. No matter how much he struggles and swears, Jay’s grappling technique still outmatches him and he finds himself on the floor glaring up at Jay’s freckles and Zane’s disappointed frown.

He subconsciously winces when Lloyd enters his field of vision.

“Is that why you were trying to talk to me back at the store?” Lloyd asks, but his tone is unreadable. He doesn’t look too happy, but at least he is not panicking, yet.

“Kai, that was uncalled for.” Zane’s icy tone feels like a bucket of cold water has dumped itself onto the flaming hot anger Kai felt earlier on. He looks away from Zane’s gaze, unable to bear the sudden wave of humiliation coursing through him. “Back there, you looked like you were about to say something terrible. At that point I could only tell nothing but the truth. You know you would, too.” Zane crosses his arms pointedly, and Kai can only nod his defeat. “But yes, there’s a ghost in this house and we made a promise to help him with something that’s rather personal to him.”

Pixal whips her head around and stares incredulously at Zane as if he has just declared that aliens are indeed real and one of the people in the room is a lizard person.

“What? What do you mean?” She turns to look at both Jay and Kai. Jay has long taken to a seating position on the floor, right on top of Kai’s struggling body. Nya makes her way around the island to kneel down next to Kai, her expression furious.

“Tell us the truth, bro bro.” Nya says, pulling out her phone. “Or this picture of you on the floor will be sent to everyone we know.”

“Jay, you explain.” Kai elbows Jay, who yelps at the force of the blow.

“Ow! Dude!” Jay grumbles, rubbing his arm where it hurts. Kai finds some enjoyment out of his friend’s pain, just because that guy grappled him really hard and now his body aches. Jay  grumbles when Kai starts snickering, but both of them turn quiet under Lloyd’s piercing glare. With a shaky breath, Jay begins telling his friends about what has transpired the night before.

He tells them the general idea of the story. He tells them about meeting Cole at night, and how the black hoodie they can see on the couch belongs to a dead person. He gives them a brief description of what Cole looks like and what was he was like as a person and watches as Nya and Pixal become more intrigued, while Lloyd seems to grow more tense.

“He was really nice.” Jay says, wringing his hands together. “He actually didn’t want us to bother to figure out how to help him, but Kai insisted.”

“Because I think it was the right thing to do, given his situation.” Kai butts in. He’s still lying on the floor and has seem to given up on trying to get up from under Jay’s weight. “You guys wouldn’t believe it, but trust me when I first heard about it I thought he was making it up.”

“So what happened?” Nya ventures. She has long taken a more comfortable seat on the kitchen island, and Pixal sits near her on a stool. “You’re talking as if he was alive pretty recently? Are we supposed to bring him to the next life, or?”

“No, no, nothing like that.” Kai shakes his head.

“We kinda… sorta… uh, promised to bring him back to life?” Jay grins sheepishly, and just like that Lloyd stands up from where he’s been slouching against the counter and stomps out of the kitchen. Everybody immediately spring into action, some voicing their concerns and some running after the blonde who’s making his way to the front door.

“Hey, Lloyd, what gives man?” Jay is the first to reach him by way of tugging onto the sleeve of his hoodie. Lloyd quickly snatches his arm away from Jay’s grasp, but the violent intent behind that action and the hurt look on Jay’s face makes him pause. Emboldened, Jay faces him on. “Dude, we did promise to look for a way, but it’s not like we’re raising the dead.”

“You are, though!” Lloyd snaps back. “You want to bring a friggin’ dead guy back to life! You know how that would pan out for us? What if bringing him back will force one of us to be in his place, huh? Did you ever think about that? Playing with the supernatural has consequences!”

“Lloyd, that’s enough. I know you’re upset, but we need to hear more from them.” Pixal steps in, her hands raised in a placating matter. Following her steps are Zane and Kai, both sporting guilty looks on their faces. Nya shoulders past them and walks up to Jay’s side.

“Okay, boys, that’s enough. Jay, this is a ridiculous story and I can’t believe you roped us all in another sort of trouble. I thought we’re already done with this bullshit.” Jay makes a protesting noise at that, but Nya cuts him off. “We’ll talk more about this later.” She turns back to Lloyd, who looks ready to bolt. “Lloyd, stay. We can talk this through. Maybe this isn’t as bad as you think, from what they’ve told us.”

“Isn’t as bad? Isn’t  _ as bad?! _ ” Lloyd’s voice goes up a couple octaves at that and both Nya and Jay cringe under his volume. “I can’t-- I can’t believe-- You know what Morro did. You know the reason why I’m terrified of the supernatural. Ghosts can’t be trusted! They used to be humans until the afterlife twists them and bends them out of shape, and the only reason they have to linger- the reason why they can’t move on- is because they are stuck with guilt, or they’re cursed, or they’ve forgotten themselves and all they can do is  _ hurt!” _ His voice cracks at that, and the loud sniffle that follows alert them of Lloyd’s emotional state. “I don’t want to be hurt again. I don’t want to deal with Morro when it comes down to this. And I don’t want to see you guys get hurt either.”

“Lloyd, I’m so sorry.” Jay’s voice is heavy with guilt, but when he advances closer, Lloyd shakes his head.

“I- I need to breathe. I gotta go.” He gulps quietly on the afternoon air as he opens the front door. Jay and Nya immediately move to stop him.

“Lloyd, wait!”

“We can talk about this-”

“Let him go.”

All heads swivel back to Kai, who’s standing tall next to Pixal and Zane. The grimness on his face softens when he makes eye contact with Lloyd. “I’m sorry it happened this way. Take your time.”

He watches as Lloyd’s tense shoulders relax for a moment, and he nods at Lloyd when the younger man leaves the house, shutting the door close with an audible click. 

“You’re just gonna let him go like that?” Jay grouches as he watches Lloyd paces back and forth in front of his lawn. “Look at him. He’s clearly upset.”

“I know he’s upset.” Kai sighs, walking up to stand next to Jay. “But he needs time to think. Trust me, you’d want to be alone to blow off some steam, too.”

“Kai’s right.” Nya speaks up from next to Jay. “I hate to admit it, but out of everyone here, you know Lloyd the best. But that doesn’t mean that you can make decisions for him, you know. Tell him the truth next time.”

“I  _ did _ try to tell him the truth!” Kai snaps back. “It was hard breaking the news to him because I knew he would react exactly like this. You guys forced us into admitting this before we even had the chance to plan things out!”

“You were acting really suspicious, Kai. You know by now that any of us would recognize each other hiding secrets.” Pixal cuts in, both in conversation and physically. She raises both arms to separate Nya from him as if she expects them to start fighting hand to hand on the spot. “All of us have been in tight spots before. I see this as another challenge you have to face in a new environment.”

“What do you mean, ‘you’? Aren’t we doing this together like how we did all the time?” Jay quirks an eyebrow at her. Pixal shakes her head and smiles a little remorsefully at Zane.

“I didn’t particularly consent to this. I merely thought that Nya, Lloyd, and I are just going to help you move in. I didn’t expect to be asked to sign up for ghost hunting.” She replies, looking away from Zane who now sports an expression that’s akin to a kicked puppy.

“I apologize. It was a surprise for us too, to have a ghost be here in our home.” Zane fiddles with the hem of his sweater. “We were hoping you would understand, since we were going to tell you the entire story anyway. We want you to meet him, too.”

Nya’s anger dissipates under Zane’s soft, regretful tone. Kai feels his annoyance slipping away, too, instead it is replaced by a churning feeling in his guts. He looks back out the window and catches Lloyd slipping into a foreign car with the sticker for Uber at the front. He figures at that point that Lloyd must’ve been unnerved enough to want to go back home. Nya catches the expression on his face, because of course she does, and rests a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Come on, let’s go eat. We have a lot to talk about.” She says, pulling both him and Jay towards the direction of the kitchen. Zane doesn’t look any happier but he still exchanges nods with Pixal and follow along the group. Jay walks with them, but he seems distracted as he keeps glancing off to the side. Kai opens his mouth to question him, but Jay cuts him off by breaking out of Nya’s hold and walking up towards the couch.

“The hoodie.” Kai finds himself saying out loud.

“Yeah.” Jay says, voice low. He picks it up gingerly and joins Kai and the others in the kitchen, where their food laid forgotten on the counter. Wordlessly, he plops the hoodie on top of the kitchen island. Nobody comments on that, but they all watch him as he situates himself on a stool and stays right next to the bundle of black cloth.

Kai doesn’t really feel like talking after all the drama either, so he keeps himself busy with bringing out the food. Zane joins in to help, tearing apart a packet of paper plates and passing them around for everyone. They still haven’t washed their utensils, and the disposable ones are somewhere in the sea of unpacked boxes in the common area, so they all use their hands in place of forks and knives. The mash potato takes a while longer to be distributed, but Nya manages to find a single pair of fork and spoon at the bottom of one of the plastic bags. When everyone settle down around the kitchen island, each with a plate of greasy chicken and some other side dish in their hands, Kai allows himself to speak up first.

“I volunteered to help Cole, because he looked sad.” He says, picking at the fried chicken skin. “I knew that sometimes people acted sad to trick others, but I believed he was telling the truth. Being a ghost in any shape or form must be a bummer, and we’re the first people he’s interacted with in like, over a year. So I thought…” He stops picking at his chicken and stares down at his plate, not wanting to look up to meet anyone’s eyes. “I thought that I could help. I mean, we’ve been through so much shit together, so what’s another one on the side? Like a house warming adventure.”

“That’s really sweet of you, Kai.” Pixal says while she’s picking up fries. “But things like this need time to process. Jumping into the fray worked when we were younger, but now as adults with legal boundaries, we simply cannot push and see what gives anymore. We have to talk things out.”

“I understand, and I’m sorry.” Zane speaks up from where he’s sitting and when Kai looks up, he catches his friend’s hand tightening just a bit around his paper plate before letting go. “We were hasty on our part, and I have to admit I was not following the more logical solutions to this problem. We should’ve taken some time to think about this before offering ourselves to help.”

Nya shoves a mouthful of coleslaw in her mouth as she nods along to Zane’s words. “I’m usually down for whatever you guys are up to, but this is definitely new. Honestly, I was kinda mad that you didn’t tell us right away, but I guess it’s because it’s more voodoo than physical fighting. I’m not so sure with working with Morro, though. Mind explaining that bit?”

Kai winces at that and goes to scratches the back of his head before he realizes that both of his hands are greasy with chicken and fries. He takes his hand away from his hair and shoves a couple more fries in his mouth instead. “Well, it’s voodoo and the supernatural. The last time we encountered something like this was when Morro tried to summon ghosts with his cult and left Lloyd stranded in an abandoned and definitely haunted house. Even if I can’t forgive him for what he does, I still need him to help us on this. I for one can’t even play with a deck of tarot cards.” He picks up his chicken and starts taking large bites, ignoring Jay’s disgusted look. “And besides, Morro’s getting better. Even Lloyd confirmed it.”

“Will he talk to us though? The last time he saw me I decked him in the face and hosed down his boss.” Nya mumbles around her mouthful. Jay snorts and chokes on his fries at that until Pixal reaches over to pat him on his back.

“Well, Morro and her had it coming. Just by forcing people into joining their necromancy cult is bad enough, but to physically harm people to gain followers?” Zane shakes his head. “You did the right thing, Nya, even if it was a little excessive. I’m sure that Morro is truly better off without his boss’s control. Last time I heard, he’s returned to Lloyd’s dojo as a student.”

Kai raises an eyebrow at that. “How did you get that information?”

“Oh, Pixal and I did a little digging. Social media does wonders for this.” Zane grins. His mood has lifted over the course of their meal and he now sits with his back straight and shoulder squared like how he usually would. Kai smiles back at him before turning to his sister.

“We can try and ask for some information. To be honest, I don’t think I can lie my way out of this. You guys have seen how bad of a liar I am.” He pops a finger in his mouth to suck off the salty grease. “But I think the only one who can talk to Morro without him throwing a fit is Wu, but I don’t want the old man to know about this. Maybe we can still convince Lloyd to help us.”

“Oh, yeah, Lloyd.” Jay frowns. “I still feel bad that we made him leave, though.”

“He left on his own. He needed to cool down.” Kai argues back. “He’ll come back, trust me.”

“What makes you so sure that he’ll come back?” Jay asks, wiping his hand with a napkin. “He was super upset. I haven’t seen him break down like this since forever.”

“I agree with Jay. Lloyd is going through a tough time. Even if he doesn’t show it, he misses you guys dearly, and the stress of balancing both college and his job as a sensei-in-training is weighing him down.” Pixal calmly explains, her voice a soothing balm over the tensing atmosphere. “Kai, you said it the best. Things are changing, and it might be time to step out of the game and let it rest for a while.”

“I know what I said.” Kai replies miserably. “But I’m still so conflicted. I still want to help, but part of me feels reluctant to do so.”

“You’re not the only one in this, you know.” Jay cuts through. His eyes are bright underneath his furrowed eyebrows. “I was reluctant, too, but to be honest, now I feel like I’m obligated to try and get it done anyway. Look at us, we’re in our early twenties. This is our time to get things going and to explore the boundaries that we are given. We’re at the cusp of adulthood but we can still have fun like kids! If this is the last time I’m going on an adventure, so be it! You offered help and Cole took it. Now it’s up to us to figure things out. It’s not like an intangible ghost who’s stuck in this house can solve his own murder mystery.”

“It’s not a murder mystery, but I do agree.” Zane nods along. “I wanted to do something worthwhile as well. You don’t have to feel bad about it, Kai. Even if it’s left unfinished, I’d still count is as an experience we never thought we’d have.”

“Aw, guys.” Kai lifts his head up to look at his best friends. “Yeah, I’ll keep that in mind. What about you girls? Are you okay with this?”

Nya straightens up from her slouch. She’s been listening in and stuffing fried chicken into her mouth, so all she can do for a whole minute is to finish chewing and swallow her food. Usually Kai would tease her about it, but he doesn’t feel like doing that at the moment.

Nya clears her throat once she has finished her bite. “Well, I can see that you guys are passionate about this, like how you do in every other situation we land ourselves in. I still think this is sketchy, though. I dunno if I’m up for it this time. Also, we only have just one week until the new semester starts for all of us.”

“I don’t think I will join, either.” Pixal says while she pushes her finished plate to one side. “It might be fun, but this is a responsibility you guys have taken upon yourselves.”

“We know.” All three of the guys sigh in unison. The conversation tapers off at that and the group falls into silence, all of them either finishing off their meal or moving to throw away the trash. While Kai and Jay are still eating, Pixal moves to wipe off crumbs and grease on the kitchen island. However, there is a bundle of black cloth on the surface that’s stopping her from cleaning properly.

“Jay, you forgot the ghost hoodie on the counter.” She says, picking it up from its place. The fabric is soft to the touch much to her surprise. She has expected it to be gross, maybe oozing with ectoplasm. Jay perks up at the mention of his name and hurriedly but gingerly take the hoodie from her hand and place it on his lap, careful so as not to get grease all over it.

“Sorry about that. I was going to talk about it, but I must’ve forgot.” He says sheepishly.

“Oh yeah, you guys did mention that the hoodie is like a link to the real world, right?” Nya comments while she ties up a plastic bag full of empty cartons and discarded paper plates. “Is it like, a summoning device or something?”

“Nah, it’s more like he manifests a form within the hoodie. Kinda like a balloon being inflated.” Jay comes over to Nya’s side to hand her his plate and napkins. “It’s kinda weird, but pretty cool at the same time. The guys didn’t get to see it when it happened, though.”

“Oh yeah, we came in when he was already wearing the hoodie.” Kai comments off to the side. “Man, I wish I was there to see it happen though. Sounds pretty darn cool to me.” At that, he pauses, dropping his plate on the kitchen counter. An idea immediately lights up in his mind. “Oh my god.”

“Hm? Something wrong, Kai?” Jay replies, not bothering to look up from stuffing his trash into the plastic bag Nya’s holding.

“Jay, you’re a genius!” Kai grins, coming over to swing an arm over his friend’s shoulder while ignoring Jay’s quizzical expression. “Thanks to you, I’ve got an idea I’d like to try.”

“What is it, Kai?” Nya asks, putting her hands on her hips. Zane, on the other hand, seems to have read his mind because he immediately brightens up from where he’s standing.

“I feel like I know what you’re thinking.” Zane says with an easy smile on his face. Kai grins back and turns to both Nya and Pixal.

“What do you think of sticking around ‘til sunset? I want you guys to meet Cole.”

 

* * *

 

Despite Nya and Pixal’s initial reluctance, their curiosity was won over and they agreed to stick around until Cole manifested. During that time, everybody concentrated on unpacking and cleaning up the house. There’s a doorway behind the kitchen that leads to the laundry area, and from there there’s another door that opens up to the backyard outside. When they moved in the day before, Jay had been the one to open the door to check out the yard, but they didn’t have enough time to really clean up anything out there. Zane said the overgrown wild plants were part of the charm, but Jay disagreed.

Kai stands by the door leading out to the backyard with a couple bottles of water stuck under his arms. To pass the time, the guys have volunteered to help with weeding while the girls stock up the fridge and clean out any old stains from the common area’s furniture. Kai watches as Zane smears his forehead with mud when he goes to wipe off sweat with warm fondness. Jay had unearthed a couple of old baseball caps from one of his boxes and passed them onto Kai and Zane. All three of them are now drenched in sweat from labor under the post noon sun while wearing really lousily colored caps, but Kai doesn’t mind. He walks down the stairs of the back porch to join his friends on the grass and passes along the chilled water bottles. For a moment, he feels like he can forget his current situation and just enjoy a day of good natured hard labor.

By the time they’re done with yard work, it is closing in on sunset. The sky has darkened ever so slightly and in the distance, Kai can see the very first hints of pink peeking through the clouds. The girls have finished their work indoors a couple hours back and are now lounging outside with Kai, Jay, and Zane on the steps of the porch. Zane is the one to leave first, commenting that he wants to look at least presentable when they meet Cole again. Jay and Kai quickly follow him back into the house to change out of their sweaty clothes as well. When Kai’s washing off the dirt on his face and arms using the kitchen sink, Nya slips in next to him, an impish grin on her face.

“He must be pretty cute for you to care about looking nice for him.” She comments, slinging an arm over his sweaty shoulders. He immediately ducks under her arm and glares, unable to contain the spread of warmth up his cheeks. She latches onto that like a leech, her brown eyes bright with mirth. “Aw, look at you! You do have a crush, huh? You’re blushing so hard right now!”

“Shut up, Nya.” He scoffs, wiping at his face to calm down. “It’s nothing like that. I just don’t want to look like a sloppy asshole, that’s all.”

“You don’t care at all whenever Pixal or I visit. You didn’t even bat a lash when Misako accidentally walked in on you in your sweaty gym pants after training.” Nya says, digging a finger into his side. “The last time I’ve seen you like this was when you were still dating Skylor.”

“Well,  _ maybe _ I want to make a good impression.” He shoots back. “I’ve known you guys and Misako for a long time. This is only my second time meeting Cole and maybe I wanna look nice for once.”

“But you didn’t deny that he’s cute.” Nya’s still grinning at him. He feels speechless at the accusation, but he can’t seem to bring himself to refute it. Instead, he takes off his sweaty shirt on the spot and throws it at her face, taking great satisfaction in hearing her shriek in disgust. While she’s distracted, he makes a mad dash upstairs to his bedroom where he can change out of his clothes in peace.

He doesn’t allow himself to wallow in his own thoughts as he changes. The sun is starting to set, and any minute now Cole will manifest without him being there to see it. Fueled by his own curiosity, Kai quickly puts on a light T-shirt and a pair of sweatpants before descending back downstairs and to the living room, where he meets up with the rest of the group. Both Jay and Zane have redressed into cleaner outfits too, with Jay wearing a faded shirt and cargo shorts, while Zane is in a comfy sweater and sweatpants. Nya and Pixal have also cleaned up, but since they didn’t sweat much to begin with, they didn’t feel the need to change out of their outfits. The only exception is that Nya has shed off her letterman jacket and draped it over the couch.

“The hoodie’s on the couch.” Jay says by way of greeting. “It’s almost time.”

Kai looks around the house. The curtains are open and the orange sky outside casts a warm light over the interior of their home. Ever so slowly, the patch of light expands and moves, slowly crawling over the back of the couch to head towards Cole’s hoodie, which is sitting innocently on one of the cushions. The entire room watches in silence, but Kai can feel a kind of nervous energy that goes along with it. The minute seems to stretch for forever until the very first bit of sunset slips onto the dark fabric of the hoodie and in the moment Kai instinctively holds his breath.

The hoodie moves.

Someone gasps out loud, but he can’t tell if it’s Pixal or Nya or himself. They all watch in wonder as the fabric tugs and stretches as if to accommodate a growing mass from within. The air around it seems to snap and fizzle ever so softly as if the molecules themselves are made of pop rocks. Jay lets out a breathless laugh, and just like that, Cole shapes into vision in front of all of them, all soft edges and big body and tired, sad eyes. He doesn’t seem to notice the extra company but instead focuses on stretching out his limbs like there are kinks in his intangible back. The warm orange light shines through his semi-translucent body and it just makes him less real than he already is.

“Oh my god,” Nya says, and the ethereal atmosphere shatters under the volume of her voice. Cole jolts from his position and finally opens his eyes to really look around the house. When he registers that there are people besides Kai, Jay, and Zane, he smiles, clearly embarrassed. Kai finds it very endearing.

“Hi there.” Cole says, wiggling his finger at Nya and Pixal who both are clearly in shock. “I’m Cole. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Oh, wow!” Nya steps up and leans in close to Cole, eyes squinting in disbelief. She looks him up and down until he visibly looks uncomfortable before she deems it okay to pull back and stick out her hand. “I thought I was going through some kind of group hallucination, but damn, you  _ are _ real! I’m Nya, Kai’s sister, Silver hair over there is Pixal, and all of us are kinda a group together. It’s nice to finally meet you, Cole.”

“Yeah.” Cole reaches out to shake her hand, but his hand slips right through her palm. He looks rather startled at that. “Ah, sorry. I’m just a little overwhelmed right now. Hold on.” Cole’s thick brows furrow together in deep concentration and his hand’s color starts to shift into a more opaque green. He takes her hand again, and this time it does hold on firmly. He shakes it once, twice, before releasing her hand. “There we go.” He says, though his voice seems to crack at the end with untold emotions.

“How did you do that?” Nya asks, staring at her hand in wonder. Cole shrinks back a bit.

“I didn’t see that when we first met.” Jay pipes in and Kai finds himself nodding along. Cole opens his mouth, but he is cut off when Zane steps in.

“That  _ is _ a surprise, definitely.” Zane says out loud, putting a hand on his chin inquisitively. Cole shrugs, helpless.

“You’re a  _ ghost! _ ” Pixal eeks out, staring at Cole with wide eyes. At that point, Cole’s shoulders are climbing up near his ears, and he looks ready to disappear to wherever he came from.

“Woah, woah, guys. Let the poor guy breathe for a second.” Kai steps up, gently shooing his friends away from Cole. “Hey, sorry that we didn’t warn you about this. I just want you to meet my sister and my friend. Another one should’ve been here, but he’s… not a big fan of ghosts, you see.”

Cole nods as he slowly unwinds. “Okay, I understand. Sorry, it’s just a lot to process right now.” He grins at the group, though his eyes seem a little teary. “To be honest, I really thought yesterday was just a dream, but you guys really kept your promise. I haven’t been around people in so long. And Nya...” He sniffles a little and quickly brings up his arm to wipe at his eyes. “Hold on, I’m just-- sorry.”

“Are you okay? Did I hurt you?” Nya asks, looking like she wants to fuss over him but not knowing how. Her arms move as if to hug him, but she keeps retracting as if her touch would burn him. Cole shakes his head and looks up. There aren’t any tears in his eyes, but Kai can see a visible patch of dark green flushing up his face. 

“It’s just, your hand is so warm. I’ve forgotten how that felt.” Cole says, and Kai can feel his heart break for him. Jay makes a soft pained noise by his side, and when he looks over, Pixal has her hand over her chest and is looking at Cole with eyes full of sympathy.

“Oh.” Nya replies softly. Then she smiles at Cole. “Well, better get used to that. We’re all kinda touchy feely around here. You can say we’re a rowdy bunch.”

“I can see that.” Cole laughs. “Your brother threw stuff at me when we first met. I was super shocked.”

“No kidding.” Nya raises an eyebrow and glares at Kai. Kai shrugs in return.

“Well, I only reacted because I thought you were a bad ghost who was there to haunt my friend.” He smiles, glad that Cole is feeling a little better. “We managed to talk things out anyway.”

“Yeah, we did.” Cole replies. “Though I believe that you guys are all here to talk some more, right?”

“You’re correct.” Zane speaks up. “We want to show you our mutual friends, and also tell you about a plan we’re thinking of that might be able to get some clues on Yang. From there, hopefully we can restore you back to your life.”

“He said ‘we’, but to be honest, the girls are still on the fence about the situation.” Jay butts in, ignoring the looks Pixal and Nya send him. “And that’s why we thought it would be best for them to get to know you personally. So Pixal, Nya, meet Cole. Cole, meet Pixal and Nya.”

“We’ve already been introduced.” Pixal says dryly, but she does come up to shake Cole’s hand. “Nice to meet you, Cole. The boys really want to help you, but I hope this will not hurt them in the process.”

“Now that I can’t be sure of.” Cole shakes her hand with the same concentration technique he used before. “I can answer some questions if you have any, though.”

“Great, because we have plenty to ask.” Pixal pipes up with a shy smile on her face. “If you don’t mind, I would like to sit down for a bit. All of us have been working hard cleaning up the house, you see."

“Oh yeah, sure!” Cole hovers off from the couch and gestures towards the cushions. “You guys can sit down. As a ghost, I don’t feel exhausted standing up.” He looks down at where his legs should be, but instead they’re just wisps of green. “Well, I guess I don’t have legs to feel tired with, either. This counts as double benefit on all theme park lines and rides.”

Kai can’t help it. Just the simple comment from Cole has made all of his previous worries dissipate into the air, and he laughs out loud. Everyone else seems to agree, too, and they all share a couple chuckles while Cole grins brightly back at them. It’s only when there’s a knock on the door that everyone falls quiet. They all look towards the door and Kai hopes that whoever’s behind it is someone he knows and has been waiting for.

He hopes that Lloyd has come back.

The person knocks on the door once again, and almost everyone jumps from the anticipation. Zane heads towards the door first and looks through the peephole. After a moment of silence, he turns around and mouths, “It’s Lloyd.” Kai pumps his fist and lets out a small cheer.

“Open the door for him, then.” Jay says before turning back to Cole. “This is the person we were waiting for. He’s not good with ghosts and… well, let’s just say he didn’t take it well when we were discussing about our involvement with you. Please don’t take anything he says to heart if he does say anything brash.” 

“I won’t.” Cole smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “I don’t think I’d be bothered, actually. I’ve had a lot to say about myself for a long time, too.”

The sound of the door opening pulls them back towards the commotion. Zane holds the door open while Lloyd stands by the doorway, casting shadow of his own into the house. He looks calmer now, the tenseness from earlier is softened by the backlight of the setting sun. Kai watches as Lloyd exchanges greetings with Zane, Pixal, and Nya before his eye settles on Cole. There, he blinks and Kai can see him shrinking back into his shell almost in slow motion. Cole on the other hand steps up from where he was with Jay and moves closer in. There’s a soft smile on his face, but his eyes are sad.

“Hello.” Cole says. He doesn’t offer his hand for Lloyd to shake. “We’ve been waiting for you. My name is Cole, and you must be Lloyd.”

“Lloyd  _ Garmadon _ .” Lloyd replies stiffly, his hands tightening around the strap of his satchel. “You’re the ghost.”

“Well, I sure am not a hologram.” Cole steps back. “Please come in. We’ve got a lot to talk about.”

Lloyd steps inside the house slowly, and when he makes eye contact with Kai, Kai makes sure to send him a nod and a thumbs up in return. Lloyd nods back and takes a deep breath. He walks up to Cole until they’re face to face and sticks out his hand. At Cole’s inquisitive look, he pulls it back, embarrassed. “Sorry, I forgot that ghosts are intangible.” When he goes to retreat, Cole quickly grabs onto his hand.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Cole soothes. “I can touch and hold things if I concentrate hard enough.”

“Oh, wow.” Lloyd stares down where their hands are connected and laughs a little breathlessly. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

“Shaking hands with a ghost?” Cole raises an eyebrow.

“Well, that, and just being here in general.” Lloyd looks around at all of his friends. Kai can’t seem to contain his own smile at the sight, and when their eyes lock Lloyd quickly turns away, cheeks flushing.

“But I guess…” Lloyd mumbles, barely loud enough to be heard. “It’s nice to meet you, too.”

Cole’s smile is blinding.


	5. i wonder if we can push our way through

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zane catches feelings, maybe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been gone for a month, whoops. It's just that I'm now a senior in college, so I have a lot on my plate. However, that doesn't mean this fic is abandoned. I'm too in love with it to do so.
> 
> Please! Be patient with me!

Zane is very sure that he’s not supposed to like Cole this much since he’s only known him for less than two days. The way that everyone flocks around the dark-haired ghost, however, says otherwise. Cole, right from the get-go, has shown himself to be a quietly charming person. The way he talks and holds himself is a little similar to Kai in how he would show off his bravado unconsciously. At the same time, he is shy and skittish with his emotions sometimes getting the better of him, evidently when he cried when he shook Nya’s hand. He’s also surprisingly funny, Zane finds, when he cracks little side jokes whenever the conversation goes too dark.

Zane thinks Cole is very, very nice, as far as being a ghost and possibly evil go.

But Zane has never been the most confrontational of the group. Usually that would go to the Smiths siblings who have been with each other through thick and thin. Zane has his own fair share of misadventures too, but he also prefers to relax by a fishing pond and just meditate. Meeting Cole and having to confront again the supernatural aspect of the world has shaken him, but he’s willing to try again for his friends.

Speaking of them, though, he checks his phone. The time is currently a little past seven and everyone is either gathered around Jay’s laptop or hanging by the kitchen to help cook dinner. Zane belongs to the latter group simply because he’s one of the only ones who knows how to cook a proper meal. Cole and Lloyd, surprisingly, are with him. When he asked them why the sudden interest, Cole had replied with a heartbreaking confession that he missed seeing actual food. Lloyd, on the other hand had a pinched expression. 

“I want…” He began, taking in a deep breath. “I want to get to know Cole better. Maybe hanging out with him will help me with this fear.”

Zane had pulled Lloyd into a hug afterwards while Cole grinned, looking extremely pleased. Now they’re standing together, talking gently about some subjects that Zane is too zoned out to fully understand. He focuses instead towards the pot of tomato sauce for his pasta dish. Tonight is the real housewarming night, and thus he is intent on making the best spaghetti and meatballs that anyone has ever tasted.

“-sorry that you had to go through all of that.” Zane catches Cole saying to Lloyd. “Nobody should experience the pain of being forced into doing something you don’t want to do. Especially when your life and emotional wellbeing is on the line.”

“Thank you.” Lloyd says as he cradles the mug of tea Zane made for him earlier. “I guess in this case, we’re all the same.”

“Yeah?” Cole’s tone is questioning.

“Mhm. All of us are so close because we’ve all been through a lot of bad things together.” Lloyd’s voice lowers, but Zane can still hear it clearly. “I’m glad they’re my friends. I don’t think I’ll be here right now without them.”

“That’s good to hear.” Cole replies, equally soft. “I’m very thankful to have met you guys, too. I thought I was going to be alone forever.”

Both of them fall quiet for a moment. Zane takes that time to check on the sauce and the meatballs. They’re almost done, but he takes a handful of basil and stir them in for taste. It’s a little fancier than the usual dish; he doesn’t mind showing off once in a while.

“Same here.” Lloyd says, and Zane can’t help but pause his cooking. “But they saved me. They gave me a chance to be better and to find friends and a home. I think you deserve to have that chance, too.”

Silence, only punctuated by Cole’s quiet intake of breath. Zane turns off the stove and goes to grab dinner plates from one of the overhead cupboards. He can’t help but keep listening.

“Thank you.” Cole’s voice comes out like a half-sob. “Thank you so much.”

The stack of plates in Zane’s hand land a little too loudly for his taste. The clattering of dishware strikes like a knife through the quietness of Lloyd and Cole’s conversation, and Zane can feel his face heating up in embarrassment. Outwardly, he just makes an apologetic noise and goes to find their eating utensils. He can hear Lloyd clears his throat while Cole stays quiet, but when he turns around with forks and spoons in hand, both of them are smiling. He can feel his heart reach out for them, but at it is, he sticks to his usual routine.

“Guys, dinner’s ready.” Zane announces, tone light. A chorus of whoops and cheers greet him like usual as the rest of the group scramble out from where they’re gathering to crowd around the kitchen island. Kai sidles up next to him and offers to help him pass around the pasta plates. Like a routine, Zane passes along the hot plates to Kai, who doesn’t flinch when his bare hands get in contact with the heat. It’s familiar enough that he doesn’t put much thought into it until he realizes that he’s made an extra plate for Cole, who’s a  _ ghost _ .

Cole on the other hand has a wide-eyed expression on his face. His eyes are bright and his brows are high and he keeps hovering between the pot of leftover sauce and the nicely presented food on the kitchen island. Zane watches as he takes in a deep breath and droops immediately afterwards.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t really think about your situation.” Zane comes up to Cole, the concern weighing heavily in his gut. “Are you okay?”

Cole shakes his head, looking like a kicked puppy.

“I can’t smell anything.” He explains, and Zane can feel his heart pummels down to his feet. Lloyd breathes a soft “Oh” on the side, and suddenly all eyes are on Cole, who return the stares with a slight smile and shrug.

“That’s just sad, dude.” Jay comments off-handedly. Cole laughs a little at that, waving his hand in a placating matter.

“It’s alright. At least I still have other working senses.” He points to his eyes. “At least I can enjoy the view.”

“It’s like they always say,” Nya pipes up to the side. “You feast with your eyes first.”

“You’re absolutely right.” Cole replies.

The conversation veers off into a lighter topic afterwards. While everyone sits around the island, Cole hovers nearby. Sometimes he joins into the conversation, but most of the time he stays quiet, watching them with a sort of longing look that Zane can’t bear to comment on. Instead, he focuses his gaze back to watch everyone else. Kai is slurping his spaghetti quite loudly and Jay has sauce on the corner of his mouth that makes Zane itch to wipe it off. Lloyd is laughing at something Kai said while spooning in more sauce over his pasta and Nya’s right behind him in line, waiting for her second helping. Zane turns to Pixal and catches her typing furiously on her phone, her brows furrowed in concentration.

“Pixal? What’s up?” Zane asks her quietly, not wanting to draw any attention from the noisier members of their group.

“I’m searching for Cole online.” She replies, and he can feel his eyebrows climbing up his forehead at her revelation. “Jay took his laptop out for that, too, but we didn’t find any information at first. There are too many people with Cole as a name, and without a last name, it will be hard to narrow it down.”

“But?” Zane draws his gaze up to Cole, who’s chatting away with an enthused Nya.

“But it’s strange.” Pixal says. “Everytime I feel like I’m getting close to a result, the answer just disappears. It’s like there’s something blocking access to his information. It’s not the internet’s fault, but whenever I have something ready to type, I just can’t seem to word it. It all becomes vague in my head. I wonder if others have experienced that, too.”

“Cole did say that the curse basically erased his existence in this world.” Zane murmurs, putting a hand on his chin. “I didn’t know that it could even create mental blocks like this.”

“In any case, I think the best way we could do this is research and look for the existence of the human Cole.” Pixal replies, tilting her head towards the man in question. “The supernatural tends not to disrupt technology like the internet. If we can get past the psychological influences the curse has, we should be able to find him.”

“Did you tell the others about this?” Zane asks as he pulls his attention back to the plate of cooling spaghetti in front of him. Pixal follows suit, just to act more natural..

“I did. Did you think we were just playing around while you cook?” She says before taking a dainty bite of her food. “Cole has been stuck like this for a year. Even if we take our time with this, I think it’s best to finish this quickly. School is starting again soon.”

Zane sighs at that. “You’re right, Pixal. I still have to worry about my senior thesis coming up.”

“Did somebody fucking mention ‘senior thesis’ in my household!?” Jay pipes up from the other side of the island, punctuating his sentence by slamming his fists dramatically on the table surface. “How  _ dare  _ you! I don’t want this kind of anxiety in my life!”

“Yeah, man.” Kai folds his arms. “No school talk during food time. We had a deal.”

The table roars up with life at the sudden topic of college and school life. Most of the group complain about the busy life they’re going to experience once the school year starts. When Jay dramatically flops on top of the counter and subsequently planting his fist in his own food plate, Zane catches Cole covering his mouth to hide a smile. He doesn’t do it well and instead lets out a soft giggle-snort noise that has Zane’s stomach fluttering with warmth.

When Zane looks back at Pixal, she’s already smiling knowingly at him.

 

* * *

 

Their friends leave later into the night. Before Lloyd joins Nya and Pixal to go back to the dojo, he lingers by the doorway to talk to Cole. Whatever they’re talking about is interrupted by Kai forcing Lloyd into an overly affectionate hug-noogie combo, much to the surprise and enjoyment of Cole. Kai also blubbers for five minutes straight of how proud he is of Lloyd giving Cole a chance and how excited he is to have his lil bro on board. By the time Lloyd leaves, the poor kid’s hair is a mess and his hoodie is askew. Zane closes the door for him, but not without giving him an affectionate pat on the shoulder as well.

“Thank you for coming back.” He says when Lloyd is making his way to Nya’s car. The younger man turns around and shrugs as if he’s still shy about it.

“It’s nothing, really.” Lloyd says, scuffing the tip of his shoe against the concrete pavement. “I did it for myself, too. I wanted to finally get over it.”

“We’re proud of you, you know.” Zane replies and watches as Lloyd’s face turns a peach pink. Lloyd’s lips wobbles a little, but he quickly scrubs his eyes with the heel of his palm and plasters on a toothy grin.

“Thanks, Zane.” He turns to walk away. “I’ll see you guys later?”

“Definitely.” Zane smiles back. He doesn’t close the door until Lloyd enters Nya’s car, and he still doesn’t close it until their car drives away into the horizon.

When Zane comes back inside to clean up, Jay has already pulled Cole and Kai aside to discuss about their plans. Upon seeing Zane entering, Jay perks up and waves him over, patting the seat next to him on the couch.

“Pixal told me she told you what I told her about thinking of doing.” Jay says by way of explanation while Zane sits down next to him. “ I think it’s best to settle this with Cole first.”

“Settle what?” Cole asks, hovering by the arm of the couch as if he’s perching on it. Kai’s draped over the back of the couch, arms cushioning his face as he blinks up at Cole.

“While you were talking to Lloyd and stuff- which by the way, thank you for that - we talked about ways to help you trigger your memory first. That way, we can find you online.” He says, running a hand through his messy hair. “Either that, or we find you online and maybe start looking for connections. The memories of you are erased, but your online presence shouldn’t be.”

“Pixal told me about it during dinner.” Zane confesses. “But she also said that something was blocking her  _ mentally _ whenever she felt her search was coming close. Do you know if there’s any more influence this ‘Yang’ person has over memories, Cole?”

“Oh yeah, that happened to me too.” Jay nods. “It’s really weird. I should be able to look you up online, considering that you’ve only been gone for a year, but there’s something holding me back from finding information.”

“I see.” Cole goes quiet for a moment, his brows furrowed in concentration. He fiddles with the hem of his hoodie, gaze downcast. After a moment, he looks up at them. “Yang told me he was stuck in the house for years. I don’t know if he was even tech savvy. When he cursed me…” He sighs, rubbing his eyes. “When he cursed me, he told me that any memories of me will be erased. But since I have trouble even recalling myself, I think it does have something to do with creating a mental block. I’ve never considered it though, until today.”

“That makes sense.” Zane nods. “You were alone for a while. You didn’t get to see how much influence Yang had over the people you knew.”

“I say we find him and kick his ass.” Kai grins. His arm has wandered from its folded position and now he has his fingers playing with the fluffy strands of Jay’s hair. Already used to it, Jay reaches around to smack his hand away, but it doesn’t deter him.

“Well, we need to give Cole a footing first. Did Lloyd say anything about Morro in the end?” Jay asks, grabbing onto Kai’s fingers and twisting them at a painful angle. Kai yanks his hand away with a hiss. Cole shrugs at Jay’s question.

“He mentioned him, but I didn’t pry.” Cole says. “Lloyd told me he would figure something out. But from what I’ve heard from you guys, Morro used to practice voodoo?”

“Necromancy.” Zane corrects him. “He used to be another dojo student, but he betrayed our sensei and joined a cult. He’s back now, and it seems he’s trying to atone for his past mistakes.”

“Well, at least you guys have some supernatural experiences beforehand.” Cole replies, picking at his hoodie. He seems to do that a lot whenever he’s contemplating or nervous.

“Now that you mentioned it,” Jay says as he turns to Cole, phone in hand with a note app on the ready. “This morning you left us a note. First of all, we now know that you can at least turn one part of your body solid, but do you have any other ghostly abilities? Second of all, you said you disappear by sunrise and reappear by sunset. What happens during that time when you disappear? How does it work? Do you watch us when we sleep?” At that, Jay presses a dramatic hand to his chest and widen his eyes as if he’s a scandalized maiden.

Cole seems to be less amused and more flustered at Jay’s acts. Instead, he vigorously shakes his head at the notion of even watching any of them during their sleep. Still, something in Zane’s chest loosens at his admission, and Kai lets out a quiet “phew” as well.

“I would never do that to you guys!” Cole sounds scandalized by the idea. “That’s an invasion of privacy! I-it’s just not the right thing to do!”

“Chill dude, I’m just joking.” Jay waves his hand flippantly. Cole sighs, clearly not used to Jay’s sense of humor.

“Back to the topic at hand.” He says, and Zane feels himself go silent even if he hasn’t been talking. There’s a tone to Cole’s voice that makes him feel a little nostalgic, but also alert. It’s like the voice of one who’s used to be in command, but Cole seems to be unaware of it. “Besides solidifying, I can permeate through walls, but my hoodie can’t. I don’t really know how it works with me being able to wear it, but I think it’s more like a manifested object.”

“Can I wear it?” Kai asks, grinning at Cole.

“I guess? If I’m not wearing it, it should be a normal hoodie.” Cole shrugs. “And the disappearing thing is not voluntarily. It seems that during the day my spiritual energy is at its lowest point, so I can’t maintain this form. When it’s night time, if the hoodie is within this house, I should be able to create a visible and more tangible form.”

“I’ve never thought that’s how ghosts do it.” Jay admits. “I’ve always thought it’s more like a vampire thing, where they’re afraid of the sun.”

“I can assure you I like the sun plenty.” Cole says. Zane nods along, and by his side, Kai adjusts his body on the back of the couch so he’s laying on his back instead, balancing precariously on the edge.

“That explains how you can still sort of interact with us.” Kai says. “Like the windy thing? Are those what you call ‘cold spots’ for ghosts?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never thought of it that way before.” Cole shrugs again. “Being a ghost feels like time is an illusion. After a while the only thing that keeps me going is meditating and counting days.”

“Can you go outside?” Zane asks, and his pity only grows when Cole shakes his head.

“There’s a barrier around this house and stops me from leaving. It was the same thing that Yang had trouble with.” Cole says it like a sigh. “I’ve tried to leave before, trust me, but I can’t go anywhere further than the front door.”

“Dang.” Jay murmurs. Zane and Kai both nod, sharing his sentiment. Cole doesn’t look any less uncomfortable from where he’s hovering. The more he talks about his condition, the quieter his voice becomes. Right now, he’s drooping visibly, and Zane doesn’t know how to react or comment on it.

As long as Zane can remember, his empathy towards others has been low. It is not as if he’s lacking in sympathy, or he’s not interested in helping others when they’re hurting, but it’s just a thing that he has. His childhood was mostly of him growing up in the walls of his father’s scientific lab in the snowy northern parts of the country. That kind of isolation suited his father’s lifestyle, but it had a more negative impact on him. When they finally moved back to the city, he couldn’t understand and play with his peers. 

Even now, years after meeting Jay, Kai, and the others, he still struggles with understanding other people’s pain. However, that doesn’t mean he can’t read the atmosphere of the room and from where he is right now, he knows that everybody needs a break from emotion and information.

“Let’s take a break for tonight.” Zane says, standing up from his seat. He acknowledges his friends and Cole looking up at him in surprise but  he doesn’t comment on it. Instead, he rolls his shoulders and gives them an amiable smile. “I know that there’s so much more that we can talk about, but let’s take it slow. Also since I cooked, you guys should do the dishes.”

He laughs behind his hand when Jay whines and Kai rolls off his perch and onto the floor with a dull  _ thud _ . Cole immediately jumps from his “seat” and hovers over Kai worriedly.

“Are you okay?” Cole asks, reaching out a hand to help Kai up. Zane catches Kai staring at Cole with wide eyes and notes that down internally. It’ll be an interesting development for sure. Kai has always been the type to catch feelings quickly. Most notably of course was when he first met Skylor. Zane wasn’t there to see it happen the first time, but he remembers that someone somewhere has told him about it. Maybe it was Jay.

At any rate, Zane thinks that Kai is very close to being smitten by this charming ghost.

Jay comes over and kicks at Kai until he rolls over and gets up. Cole watches that happen with an amused smile on his face. When Jay sees it, he looks rather flustered as well. However, instead of interacting more with Cole, he turns to Zane and announces loudly that whoever does the dishes last will have to take care of laundry.

“I already did it for all of you yesterday.” Jay huffs, rolling up his sleeves. “Kai, I’d like some help. Where do you keep your sponge and dish soap, Zane?”

Now distracted with more house chores, the group helped with gathering up the dishes and cleaning the tables. Cole follows Zane around, his hands carefully lifting up plates and bowls to stack them into a neat pile. Zane offers to help, but he shakes his head.

“I’d like to do this.” Cole says to him while he’s scraping leftovers into the trash bin. “I want to remember these feelings. It feels good to do things like this instead of sitting around all day.”

“I understand what you mean.” Zane replies.

“You do?” Cole looks up, surprised. Zane inclines his head to stare at his own hands.

“Maybe not as a ghost. That I don’t think that I’ll ever truly grasp your feelings and perspective on the matter.” He says, clenching and unclenching his hands. “But for a long time, I was alone. I had my father with me, but besides him, I hardly ever gotten any contact from other people, so I busied myself with work. It’s a good way to distract myself from boredom, and now I can cook very well.”

“Zane’s food  _ is _ delicious.” Kai says from where Jay and him are set up in front of the sink. “I think I can get fat on just eating his food all the time.”

“Dude, that’s just wrong.” Jay scoffs, elbows deep in soapy dish water. “Zane cooks the healthiest stuff. That’s why I can maintain this beautiful body of mine.”

“You look like a twink.” Kai hip checks Jay, who squawks dramatically.

“ _ Excuse me? _ ” Jay shrieks. “I am a  _ twunk _ ! It’s a combination of twink and hunk!  _ Hunk! _ ”

“Hey, stop splashing water everywhere! You’re getting grease on my shirt!” Kai snaps back.

“Both of you, please-” Zane speaks up, but he’s cut off by a weird sound coming from his side. It’s raspy and awkward, but he recognizes it as laughter. The kitchen falls silent as Zane, Kai, and Jay watch Cole laugh, mesmerized. It’s weird, because Cole has laughed before, but most of the time they were quiet and breathy chuckles that came and went quickly. This time, Cole’s voice rings clear. It’s loud and there’s a bit of breathlessness that comes with it, indicating how long he’s gone without having a good guffaw. Cole seems to immensely enjoy Kai and Jay’s banter, because he’s doubling over while clutching his belly. Zane feels his chest go all gooey and subconsciously presses his hand over the spot.

When Cole’s laughter putters out, it’s also when he realizes that everyone is staring at him. His face flushes a darker shade of green and he shrinks back, clearly embarrassed.

“Ah, sorry-” Cole starts, but Jay’s already waving him off, literally sending water and sud everywhere with his frantic hands.

“No, no, it’s fine!” He says, bringing his wrist up to scrub at his pinking cheeks. “We were all just surprised.”

“I don’t want you to think I was laughing at you.” Cole replies, wringing his hands nervously. Jay shakes his head, unsatisfied.

“It’s completely fine. We talk to each other like this all the time.” Jay grins and Kai nods along. “I mean, I wouldn’t mind if you laughed at me. At least there’s someone in this household who thinks I’m funny.” At that, he glares at Kai, who can’t help but bark out a laugh.

“You think you’re so funny, but lemme tell ya, I still remember when you signed up for audition back in school. You thought you were gonna score my sister with your comedy routine.” Kai starts, and Jay yelps, swinging his wet hand at him. Kai easily dodges that, but both of them soon dissolve into more bantering. Sometimes one of them would try and dunk another into the water-filled sink, but from where Zane’s standing, it is normal for him to see them act like this.

They used to do this, too, when Lloyd first came in. They were awkward about it, but the joking around helped Lloyd feel like he was part of the group, and it also didn’t force him to talk all the time. It was a conscious effort on their part, and later on they used it with Pixal when she finally joined the group. Now it’s completely natural for them to do it, and judging from Cole’s amused expression, it’s working out just fine.

“Don’t feel bad when you laugh at Jay and Kai.” Zane turns to Cole, keeping his voice low. “It makes them happy when people think they’re funny. They’re our group’s social powerhouses after all.”

“I think I can see that.” Cole nods, his gaze wandering to the pair by the sink. “I’ve only known them for two nights, but they’re just…” He gestures with his hands, trying to articulate his thought. “They’re really bright. I can see why people can listen to them, even when they’re just joking around.”

“If you tell them that, they will not shut up about it for a week. Sometimes I think they’re like puppies; they’re always begging for attention.” Zane replies, and Cole laughs out loud again. He quickly quiets down when Jay and Kai glances over, but the smile doesn’t leave his face. Zane feels the same gooey feeling in his chest again and without thinking properly, he blurts out.

“You shouldn’t stop yourself from laughing.”

“Huh?” Cole turns to him.

“Your laugh.” Zane clears his throat. His cheeks feel a little warm. “It’s nice. Don’t hold it back.”

“Ah, thank you.” Cole grins widely, showing off the dimples on his cheeks. “You know, I just got this weird feeling. I felt like maybe I’ve been told that comment before, or maybe I was the one who said it.”

“What comment?” Zane asks, a little distracted over how hard his heart is pounding just over a simple smile.

“You said I shouldn’t hold back my laugh.” Cole says. “I feel like that’s something I’ve experienced before.”

“Like the feeling of deja-vu?” Jay butts in, putting his wet hands over Zane’s shoulders. Zane suppresses a shudder and sends Jay a dirty look, but it doesn’t deter his friend at all. “Maybe being around people can actually trigger your memory! If that actually works, of course.”

“I don’t think a human brain can switch on and off on command, dude.” Kai pipes up, wiping his hands carefully with a kitchen towel. “You should know better, but then again you’re such a huge engineering nerd, I’d say you’re part way machine already.”

“Shut up, Kai.” Jay grumbles, pressing head against Zane’s cheek. It’s an easy gesture that Zane never really minds. Jay continues on, kicking Kai’s shin in jest. “At least I’m not a musclehead like you.”

As the two of them fall into another round of bickering again, Zane feels Cole’s hand tugging on his sleeve. He looks back at the ghost, but Cole isn’t looking at him. Instead, he’s staring at Jay and Kai, his eyes misting over with an emotion that Zane can’t quite grasp. 

“Cole?” He calls out quietly, and the ghost blinks, the haze fading from his eyes.

“Zane.” Cole breathes out. “I feel like I’m getting the sense of deja-vu again. There’s something really familiar, but I just can’t remember what.”

Zane stares at him, trying to figure out what Cole is thinking. However at this moment he can’t seem to comprehend the emotions that Cole, a ghost, is going through. Instead, he presses his fingers against the dark fabric of his hoodie, gently surprised at the solidness underneath. 

“It’s okay, Cole. We’ll figure something out.” He says, but the way Cole seems to linger at the simple sight of his friends goofing around makes something in his chest clenches.


	6. skimming through the days of old

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> who doesn't love a midnight talk?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! Well I'm glad school is over for now. This chapter was actually too long, and halfway through I decided to break it into two parts. Part two is in the works right now, so please look forward to it!
> 
> Hopefully I can still update even after break. I'm so grateful for your understanding, and I promise that I won't be dropping this fic anytime soon. Even if takes a while, please wait for me!

Zane opens his eyes to the ceiling of his bedroom. The window next to his bed casts a cold white light into his room, highlighting the knick-knacks and furniture with a tinted blue glow. He vaguely recognizes that it’s snowing outside. Suddenly the window is gone and he watches as snow quickly gets blown in and piled up on the old wooden floor. He walks on top of it, unbothered by the biting cold.

The door leading out of his bedroom seems to get bigger the closer he gets, and by the time he reaches the old metal doorknob, he feels twice as small as he was before. When he opens the door, the howling wind whips around him and lead twirling snowflakes down to an old and dark hallway. It’s strange, he thinks to himself. At this time, his home should be bright and warm, with his father waiting for him with a hot bowl of oatmeal in the little kitchenette they shared. Zane wants to find him. He  _ has _ to find him. 

The feeling tugs and pulls at his chest. By instinct, Zane continues to stumble along the hallway, noting that the temperature is dropping as little fragments of ice start spreading along the old walls of the cabin. His father’s bedroom door is towards the end of the hall. The snow grows more denser as he moves on. Zane shivers again as he wraps his arms around his torso to keep warm. His pajamas are soaked through with the snow, but he feels nothing but dread as he comes up to his father’s door. He knocks once and then twice, but nobody answers. 

“Father?” He calls out, his voice sounding high and tinny in his own ears. “Father, please open the door.”

He receives only silence in return, save for the audible groan in response to the house succumbing under the weight of frost and snow. Zane can see his own fingertips turning blue as he pushes the door open with all his might. Instead of seeing his father asleep in bed, one of the walls of his bedroom has fallen open and the snow is already knee-high. He frantically looks around and finds his father half-buried in the snow next to his bed.

Zane doesn’t remember screaming for his father, but he feels like he did. He sees himself struggling to pull his father’s heavy body out from underneath the snow as the wind howls and whips around him. Though he feels numb from head to toe, he keeps holding onto his father’s arm in a desperate attempt to get him out of the room.

“Help!” He sobs, his legs feeling like jello under the strain of pulling his father towards their exit. “Please help! Somebody! My father needs help!”

But the only answer he receives is the wind. 

“It’s so cold!” Zane cries, and he doesn’t remember passing through the threshold of the bedroom door into the snowing walkway outside his house. “I need help! Somebody, please!”

“Zane?” A voice asks. He barely hears it through the snow storm.

“Help me! My father is dying!” He screams back, his snot and tears matting and freezing up on his face. “It’s so cold! I don’t want my father to die!”

“Zane!” The voice replies, but he drowns it out as he screams and sobs into the wind. He doesn’t want to look back. He doesn’t want to see what his father looks like, cold and numb and caked with ice. The voice says his name again and again, before he feels a hand on his shoulder, shaking him out of his panic.

“Zane, wake up!”

He immediately springs awake, his entire body shaking off the sudden shock of getting up so quickly from the initial stasis position. He groans and feels the dry burn lining down his throat as if he’s been screaming in his sleep. He coughs once, twice, before his vision adjusts enough to see his bedroom. This is definitely not the same one from his dream, because the furniture and arrangements are different. He realizes, once his breathing has calmed down, that it all was just a dream.

He has not seen his childhood home in almost a decade, after all.

A cup of water thrusts itself into his field of vision, and he jolts a bit at that. Once his eyes are fully adjusted, he can see Cole, transparent and back-lit by the moonlight filtering through his thin curtains. The ghost looks rather worried, even borderline scared. Not trusting his vocal cords to work properly, Zane shakily takes the cup from Cole’s hand to bring it up to his lips. He doesn’t even realize how thirsty he is until he downs the entire cup in a couple big gulps. When he wipes his hand over his mouth, he can feel wet patches on his cheeks.

“You were crying and screaming in your sleep.” Cole says, his voice low in an effort to not break the silence of the night. “I didn’t know what I was thinking, but I thought it was better to wake you up. I’m sorry about this.” He looks away and moves to the door. “This is probably creeping you out. I’ll leave immediately.”

“No, wait.” Zane speaks up, voice cracking. He reaches out a hand to grab onto Cole’s sleeve. “Don’t go.” When Cole turns around, gaze inquisitive, Zane quickly releases his grip, his mind fumbling for an excuse. “It’s cold.”

There’s something about his expression that Cole must’ve seen, because the ghost immediately floats out of the door and out of sight. The cold and empty hole in Zane’s chest expands and drops, and Zane tries to fight a full body shiver at Cole’s heartless act. He buries his face in his hands and lets out a wordless sob before flopping back onto bed. He doesn’t know how long he laid there, crying quietly into his hand, but the memory of the dream keeps him in-between wakefulness and sleep.

And then he smells tea; chamomile to be exact. He sits up to turn on the lamp on his night stand right as Cole emerges, carefully carrying a hot mug with a solidified hand. He must look like a dumbfounded wreck, because Cole’s face softens at the sight of him. He carefully floats towards Zane, offering the mug and Zane can smell the aroma and warmth of the tea by proximity.

“Careful, it’s hot.” Cole says. “I don’t exactly know the temperature. When I make my hand solid, I can feel it, but it’s more muted than the usual human’s touch.”

“Thank you.” Zane replies, carefully taking the mug from him. The tea bag is still steeping in the hot water, and just by holding the mug he can already feel his clammy hands warming up. In the corner of his eyes, he can see Cole floating back towards the door. He sits up straighter and places the mug on his night stand. “Wait, Cole!” The ghost pauses. “I meant what I said. Please stay.”

Cole hovers, looking quite unsure of himself, before relenting. 

“Alright.” He floats back to Zane’s bedside and only sits down at the foot of Zane’s bed after the other man gestures it to him.

Both of them sit together in silence until Zane deems his tea at the right temperature to drink. He takes a careful sip and feels the heat spread all over his body down to his toes. With a satisfied sigh, he puts the cup down, cradling it in his hands to keep his belly warm. “You didn’t have to do this, you know.” He says, looking at the ghost on his bed.

“I understand, but I didn’t want to hear you in pain.” Cole twirls his thumbs, not quite looking at Zane in his eyes. “Even though I promised I wouldn’t bother you guys at night, I could hear you crying. I did the best thing I could think of.”

Zane stares at Cole, his brain wracking for any words to say to him. Outwardly, he just stares down at the mug in his hands, watching the steam rise. Cole doesn’t seem to want to say anything, either. Zane takes the teabag out of the mug and sets it aside on his nightstand, too tired to throw it away properly. Then he takes a proper sip, savoring the drink and feeling it warm him up all over again.

“This is… really good.” He murmurs, surprised at the sweet and distinctive flavor of honey that sweetens his drink. Usually he would have his tea without adding anything. He knows both Kai and Jay also drink tea, but Jay tends to dump a couple spoonfuls of sugar in his. Kai likes his tea with milk, but nowadays he’s started to favor coffee. Zane wonders if Cole knows what he’s doing choosing honey and chamomile over everything else.

“Is it?” Cole asks, his lips turning up to form a small smile. “I was just following instinct. Somehow I feel like tea and honey would be best for this situation. I’m glad you like it.”

“I do. Thank you, Cole.” Zane smiles back and slumps against his headboard. The hard surface is cold and uncomfortable, so he sets his tea to the side to prop himself up with some pillows. Once he’s done, he goes to take another sip of his tea. “You know, this tastes rather familiar. I feel like I’ve had something like this before.”

“Oh, really?” Cole hums, staring into space with furrowed brows. “I feel like I’m a tea person. Chamomile and honey are a common combination. Maybe that’s why I made it. I think most people would.”

“Maybe I’ve made it before. You might be right.” Zane nods. “But the tea is sweet and I can’t remember the last time I’ve tried this. Maybe my father made it for me before.” At that, he pauses. The memory of his dream comes rushing back to him, and even when the edges of those images are blurred, he can still remember the freezing grip it had around his heart. There must be something on his face, because Cole suddenly scoots closer to him, the glow of the lamp casting soft orange shades on his otherwise murky form.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Cole asks him, concern edging into his tone. Zane blinks up at him, pondering the question. He automatically takes a larger gulp of tea, feeling the soothing warmth edges towards almost burning hot. Cole watches him carefully, though his expression doesn’t change. 

Zane thinks about it carefully. His friends always have concern over him and his history living in the freezing tundras with his father. They know bits and pieces of one of the most traumatic moments of his life, it being when he woke up one morning to find his father unconscious in his bedroom. Of course, he had managed to call an ambulance and his father recovered overtime, but the resounding trauma it gave Zane was by no means forgettable. However, Cole is a third party that Zane suddenly acquires in his life. He doesn’t know if it is alright to tell him something so personal so quickly.

But there’s something about Cole that makes Zane wants to trust him.

“It was a nightmare.” Zane begins, holding his eye contact with Cole. Cole nods slowly, signaling him to continue. “I woke up in my childhood bedroom. It was very cold inside, for some reason. I don’t remember why, but there was this insistent thought that I had. ‘Gotta find my father.’ That was it.” Zane takes a deep breath to soothe away the shakiness of his voice. “My childhood home was a cabin in the middle of an evergreen forest. We lived up north before moving here, my father and I. It always snowed most of the year, so we took great care of heat insulation. My father would usually wake up before me to work the fireplace, so when I got up it was always toasty and warm.”

“It sounds like it was a cozy place to live.” Cole comments.

“It was.” Zane agrees. “So it was really strange for me to feel cold when I walked into the hallway in my dream. There was snow everywhere, as if somebody tore down our walls in the middle of a snowstorm. I came up to my father’s door and called out for him, but he never replied.” He takes another sip of his drink at that and is surprised by how much his hands are shaking. He quickly puts his mug on his nightstand and clasps his hands together in an attempt to will away his nerves. “When I opened the door, my father’s bedroom was snowed in. There was a wall missing, and his body was half buried in the snow. I remember sobbing over him and calling out to anyone for help. It was very cold.”

“You were almost screaming.” Cole says. “I came in and you were writhing about on your bed. I had to shake you to wake you up.”

“I do remember hearing you call my name.” Zane bows his head to avert his eyes from Cole’s. “I didn’t realize that was happening, but I’m glad you woke me up. I wouldn’t want Jay and Kai to hear me.”

“Why? Aren’t they your friends?” Cole asks, leaning in close. “Surely they’re better friends to confide in than me. You’ve only known me for a couple days.”

“I don’t know,” Zane shakes his head. “Maybe I didn’t want them to know that I’m still having nightmares. Kai and Jay can be extremely supportive, but sometimes they can get overbearing. I’ve always been the cool-headed one. I don’t think I’ll know what to do if they found out about this.” As he talks, he slowly curls in on himself until he’s resting his chin on his knees, his arms wounding around them tightly.

Cole notices it immediately, but he doesn’t offer any immediate action. Instead, he nods slowly as if he’s deep in thought. Then he sighs and leans back on his arms, his gaze redirecting up to the ceiling.

“I feel like you’re trying to hide your insecurities from your friends and family.” Cole says, his voice gentle. “But you’re also bearing this burden inside of you. You’ve carried this with you ever since you were a child, and you’ve known these guys for, what, how many years now?” He turns to face Zane. “I understand that sometimes it’s good to be the pillar of the team, but once in a while, you should let others take care of you, too.”

“But don’t you think this is ridiculous?” Zane asks, clenching the fabric of his sleeves around his fingers. “I am twenty-two now, and I still can’t get over this memory of us in that cabin in the snow. It’s  _ illogical _ . I’m a grown man, and my father is doing fine. I’m surrounded by my friends, and now I own a house.” He looks up at Cole. “Why is it that I’m still hung over this? What if my friends find out about this and look down at me for it? Kai’s always so strong, and Jay’s always so cheerful no matter what happened to them. The same goes for Nya and Lloyd. Both of them have been through so much, too. And here I am, still having nightmares about when I was twelve.”

“Oh, Zane…” Cole murmurs, scooting closer to him. In the light, Zane can see Cole’s concerned frown as he speaks. “From what I’ve heard from you and your friends, you’ve all been through so much. I wouldn’t say that Kai or Jay is cheerful or strong because they’ve overcome their own things, and neither will that apply to you. When I first met you, you were the only one to ask Kai and Jay to calm down and assess the situation. When I was getting to know you, you were considerate and a great listener. You might not be a happy-go-lucky person, but you seem to always do your best to take care of others, and I think your friends also want to do the same for you.”

“Really?” Zane asks, feeling as though a knot is blooming in his throat.

“Really.” Cole says. “And with all these nightmares you have to face, this is you handling your own pain.” At that, he straightens up and looks Zane directly in the eyes, face serious. “Grief takes many shapes and forms. Some face them with brazen cheer, and some hold them close. It’s up to you to choose how to deal with this.”

Zane goes quiet under Cole’s words. He turns them over in his head, trying to make sense of it all. Somehow they remind him of his old martial arts master and his weekly philosophical quotes, and it makes him want to smile no matter how tight his throat feels. “How did you come up with such wise words, Cole?”

The ghost shrugs at him. “I feel like I’ve experienced loss before, too. Maybe even before I was a ghost. One year of isolation might’ve given me some pointers in the process, but don’t quote me on that.”

“You might’ve been a psychology major before, then.” Zane says. “You seem to be around our age.”

“I might have,” Cole nods along. “But I can’t remember much of anything.”

“Anything?” Zane asks.

“Well…” Cole scratches his head. “I tend to gravitate towards things I think I liked in the past. If my memories of those things are strong enough, I can remember an imprint of it. For example, I know that I enjoy food.”

“You seemed to really like the dinner we had tonight.” Zane checks the clock on his nightstand. “Technically last night. It’s already 4:47 AM.”

“Oh, well, I should let you sleep.” Cole moves to stand up. “We can talk more later? Of course, if you’re still interested.”

As Cole gets up, Zane quickly follows suit, startling the ghost. Zane kicks off his blanket and shivers a bit when his toes hit the cold air, but he turns to pick up his mug and takes a sip anyway. “I don’t think I want to sleep anymore.” He explains when Cole shoots him a flabbergasted look. “I’ll join you if you don’t mind.”

“Sure, I guess.” Cole mumbles, clearly not knowing how to react. “Let me just warn you, I don’t do much usually.”

“It’s because you haven’t had proper stimuli for over a year, correct?” Zane asks and smiles when Cole nods. “Well, I’d like to hang out. Let’s do that.” With that, he opens the door and walks out into the dark hallway with only his phone as a guiding light. Cole follows him quietly, only pausing to hide a laugh when both of them pass Jay’s door and hear his loud snores.

“When we used to live in the dojo dorms, it took me and Kai so long to get used to Jay’s snores.” Zane whispers as they make their way down the creaky staircase. “It’s funny how now we can’t really sleep without it.”

“I remember hearing that when I passed his door on the first night.” Cole replies, his ghostly form allowing him to traverse across the wooden floor terrain of their house. Zane tries his best, but he feels like every step he takes lands him on another squeaky floor board. He gets bolder as they move further away from the bedrooms upstairs. The noises he makes doesn’t sound too loud anymore when he has Cole to talk to.

“So what do you usually do at night?” Zane asks after turning on one of the corner lights of the kitchen. It’s just a little thing underneath the cupboards that illuminate the counter area. The soothing warm color isn’t too harsh on his eyes, either.

“Oh, you know.” Cole shrugs, leaning against the counter. “I just float around and try to keep myself occupied. Most of the time I meditate to pass the day away.” He sighs at that. “After a while all the days blend together and I just kind of existed. There wasn’t much to do, after all.”

“Wasn’t there anything exciting at all?” Zane sips on his cooling mug of tea. “That sounds terrible. I can’t imagine being forced to live in these walls without anything to do for such a long time.”

“Well...” Cole hums. “When the renovators came to spruce up this place for the next sale, it was a little interesting. But they never stayed long enough to see me. I actually hid from them because I didn’t want them to remove my hoodie from the vicinity. Though I did try to communicate with a random worker at one point, but I think he was secretly doing acid because he was convinced I was just a hallucination.”

“That actually sounded pretty exciting.” Zane grins at Cole, who smiles back.

“Frankly, you guys are the most exciting thing I’ve seen my entire time here.” Cole scratches behind his ear. “I’m really glad you weren’t tripping balls or hallucinating. At least being in an occupied house allows me to interact with different objects.”

“Like cleaning our counters?” Zane tilts his head to look at the shining surface. “I never got to thank you for that.”

“It’s no big deal.” Cole shrugs. “Most exciting thing I’ve done in a while. I almost forgot I could hold things after not using my hands properly for so long.”

“I see.” Zane hums, gazing out the kitchen window. “So you didn’t get to go outside either, correct?”

“Yeah.” Cole follows Zane’s gaze to look out their window. The kitchen light casts a square of light onto the steps leading up to the little porch behind the house. “I’m stuck inside all the time. I miss the outdoors.”

Zane stays quiet for a minute or so with a contemplative look on his face. Then, he drains the rest of his tea and places the mug in the sink. “Wait here.” He says to Cole before making his way back up his room. He crosses the lonely common room to head up stairs, carefully taking each steps to avoid noise. Once he arrives in his bedroom, he quickly picks up his jacket. The quiet urgency he starts to develop carries him quickly through the motion, and within a couple minutes he is already back in the kitchen with his jacket draped around his shoulders.

He opens a nearby drawer at Cole’s questioning look and grabs their key to the backyard. There’s a little key chain tied to it with a frankly ridiculous dragon emoji, courtesy of Jay, but he barely lingers on it as he shuffles through the doorway at the back of their kitchen. It’s directly across from the back door and he goes up to it without hesitation.

“Come on.” He turns his head just to motion Cole to follow him. “Let’s go outside.”

“But I can’t, remember?” Cole takes slow steps after him. His eyebrows droop with melancholy. “There’s a barrier that stops me from leaving the house.”

“That won’t stop you, I’m sure.” Zane replies. “The backyard door has been locked for a while, yes? Without the key to open it, you can’t even see the outside anyway.” He says as he slips his key into the lock.

“You’re right, but…” Cole trails off as Zane twists the handle and the door opens to the backyard. The cold air of the night whips past both of them and Zane takes a deep breath. This air is different than that of his dream. It’s real and not as fresh as mountain air, but it carries with it the smell of evergreen trees, dead leaves, and wet grass. It’s grounding.

Next to Zane, Cole is quiet. Zane watches as his eyes light up with longing and awe. He doesn’t exactly breathe in the air, but his entire body seems to shiver with excitement. Zane feels his own cheeks heating up at the sight, but that’s probably because of the chill in the air. He steps past the threshold and onto the old wood porch before turning back to Cole. “You should try it.” He says, reaching his hand past the door towards Cole as an offer.

Cole’s still staring at the sight in front of him until Zane starts waving his hand in front of his face. When he finally snaps back to reality, he looks a little flustered and that also does a lot of things to Zane’s chest. Cole takes a deep breath, the action more of a habit than needed, before solidifying his hand to grab onto Zane’s. Zane doesn’t comment on how weird the ghost’s hand feels in his, how both weightless yet solid it is as he slowly guides Cole towards the doorway.

And then Cole hits the invisible barrier right at the frame. It’s like watching a person walk into a glass door. The barrier fizzle and snaps like pop rocks, sparking light green lights as it pushes back against Cole. The ghost hisses under his breath and lets go of Zane’s hand. Zane sucks in a breath as Cole steps back with his arms circling around his own frame protectively.

“Well that didn’t work.” Zane comments. Cole snorts, shaking his head.

“I told you so.” He says, but his moment of turmoil dissipates almost completely when he looks back up to see the outside. “But at least it was worth the try. And this. I missed this, too.” At that, he gestures out to the backyard. Zane turns to see where his hand is pointing, and suddenly he understands.

Their backyard is only lit by whatever light that’s filtering through their kitchen out the doorway. There, he can see glints of dew on the grass. The surrounding houses are dark, their occupants asleep at this point. There are very few street lights in the surrounding neighborhood, but the light doesn’t quite reach where Zane and Cole are standing. Trees, too, help shroud them from the artificial bright white of the street lights, and when Zane looks up in the sky, he can still see stars. There aren’t as many stars in the sky as when he was back in the mountains, but he’s sure that the lower amount of light pollution allows them to flourish more here.

“It’s very pretty.” Zane says, his voice quieting to preserve the moment.

“It is.” Cole agrees.

They both stand there and watch the sky in companionable silence. Zane has always been one to enjoy nature for what it is, unbothered by technology or distractions. It seems tonight, he’s found another friend who feels the same way. He wants to tell Cole that, but something about the peace of the night makes him hesitate. However he doesn’t need to, because Cole is the first to break the silence.

“I know this is weird, but…” Cole trails off, his gaze wandering up to the sky. “Will you stay with me ‘til I’m gone?”

And right there, Zane is struck with the realization that Cole is always lonely. It’s not so much as realization, however, but a sudden and deep surge of empathy for the ghost next to him. He remembers his dream and feels cold dread and loneliness crawling up his spine. He understands completely now. He can see himself in Cole, however small that impression is. He can see a little kid who was filled with grief and pain when his father didn’t respond. He remembers the days after his father was hospitalized when he had nowhere to go. The patient room where he was assigned to stay during his father’s treatment was cold and empty. All he could do was count the days until his father could leave the hospital and bring back warmth to their home.

So he leans back against the wall, right next to the doorway where Cole is standing. He looks up at the sky and watches as the stars blink in and out of his vision. Then, he looks back at Cole, who’s not quite looking at him, who’s probably nervous for his answer.

“Of course I’ll stay, Cole.” Zane says, watching Cole’s tense shoulders relax as he speaks. “We’re friends now, aren’t we?”

“We are?” Cole asks, swiveling his head to stare at him bewilderingly. 

“Yes, we are.” Zane smiles and when Cole grins back, he feels his face warming up again.

The night is still cold, but he feels like he doesn’t mind it as much anymore. Both of them stay there in mutual silence, only punctuated sometimes with small talk to kill the time. Before they know it, the sky slowly turns from the deep night blue to a lighter shade. As time goes on, Cole’s shape starts to become fuzzy around the edges. Zane watches in fascination as the ghost yawns and droops as if he’s physically tired. Their current conversation about plants slowly tapers off, and when the sky turns rosy pink, Cole fades away from the bottom up. The last thing Zane sees as his eyes start to droop with exhaustion is Cole’s satisfied smile.


	7. in the place rainbow born and dies (part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zane is sleepy, Jay is clumsy, and Kai is sweating it out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me another month just to get chapter 7 out, and I swear I have a good reason for it. It's mostly because I wanted to take a break from writing to do a one-shot, but there's also other things like college and job-hunting. My beta reader recently went on break, too, so I currently have no beta-reader to help me edit my work, but hopefully this chapter will still be good enough. Thank you always for being patient with me.

Kai finds Zane slumped against the back porch wall in the morning and almost drops his cup of orange juice out of surprise. The other man is sleeping with his neck bent over in a painful-looking angle, but he seems to be at peace. Next to him is something Kai recognizes immediately as Cole’s hoodie. He figures maybe they had a chat at one point in the early morning before Cole departed. Zane has always have the habit of waking up at odd hours to do random things, so he’s used to it by now.

But sleeping outside like this with barely any covers, especially when the weather’s turning cold…

Kai shakes his head and goes to wake Zane up. He kneels down next to his friend and nudges him gently on the shoulder. When Zane’s head lolls to the side and rests on top of his hand, he resists the urge to keep it there and nudges him a little harder. Zane wakes up immediately, blinking at him in a daze before his mouth opens to a wide yawn that has Kai yawing in return.

“Mornin’, sleepyhead.” Kai grins when Zane yawns again. While the other man stretches his limbs and grumble, Kai goes back to finish his daily dose of vitamin C.

“What time is it?” Zane asks, his words slurring as he heaves himself up from his uncomfortable position. Kai doesn’t comment when Zane also picks up Cole’s hoodie and tucks it under his arm.

“Seven something.” Kai answers, taking his phone out of his pocket to check the screen. “I’m gonna head out for a jog. Care to join?”

“I’m good, thanks.” Zane mumbles as he plops himself on the couch. The moment his butt hits the soft cushions he droops again, squishing his face against a pillow.

“Rough night?” Kai jokes as he passes by Zane to get to the front door. He pats his pants pockets to check for his keys, wallet, phone, and earbuds and is satisfied that all those items are there. 

“Mmm…” Zane hums into the pillow, his voice slightly muffled. Kai just laughs lightly at that as he opens the front door.

“I’ll see you in a bit?” He asks while slipping on his jogging shoes. Zane just lifts up an arm to wave at him, but that’s still a definite answer in his book. Satisfied and not at all bothered by Zane’s weird sleeping habits, he closes the door and heads off, taking in a deep breath of fresh morning air.

“Time to get used to the neighborhood.” He mutters under his breath and slips on his earbuds. The first track of his playlist blares out a steady drum beat and he sets off down the sidewalk of the cul-de-sac.

 

* * *

 

When Zane wakes up again, it’s to the smell of slightly burnt toast and eggs. There’s also the sound of Jay singing along to some pop song on his speakers, but Zane has always been one to notice culinary disasters quicker. He props himself up on his elbows and finds himself tangled with Cole’s hoodie and one of Jay’s many nerd blankets. This one’s definitely from Star Wars, he thinks to himself as he gazes upon RD-D2 wearing a christmas hat. 

“Then you’re left in the dust,” Jay murmurs to the song, wiggling his hips as he spreads peanut butter on a slice of toast, “Unless I stuck by ya. You’re a sunflower; I think your love would be too much…” He trails off, taking a huge crunching bite of his breakfast before turning around just to see Zane climbing off the couch. “Oh, Zane! Good morning! I made us breakfast!” He speaks through his mouthful.

“I know.” Zane walks up to the counter to check out Jay’s breakfast spread. “I smelled it.” The toasts aren’t burn that bad. It’s just a couple of them that goes too brown on the surface. The eggs on the other hand look pretty good. Jay clearly knows how Zane likes his eggs scrambled with salt and pepper on the side. “Looks great, Jay! Good job!”

“You know I can cook at least a little, right?” Jay takes another bite of his toast and pushes the peanut butter jar over to Zane before taking a seat next to the counter. Zane gracefully denies the peanut butter. Instead he scoops some of the scrambled egg onto a slice of toast.

“I know you can, Jay.” Zane smiles, rubbing at the corner of his eyes. “Thanks for the blanket and the food, by the way.”

“Naw, it’s no biggie.” Jay shrugs. “You needed the sleep anyway. Don’t make me remind you that you’ve been the one to coordinate most of our moving process.”

“I still could’ve done more.” Zane takes a bite of his toast and hums.The soft eggy taste overpowers not only the burnt smell but also the bad morning breath that’s developing in his mouth. Jay’s really been practicing, he notes. Even when they were still living in the dorms, the brunette has always been one to take on massive projects just for the heck of it.

“How’s the egg?” Jay asks, feigning disinterest by casually sipping his coffee, though Zane knows better than that.

“It’s delicious. Thank you, Jay.” Zane gives him his best smile and watches as his friend puffs out his chest with pride.

“Well, eat up, then!” Jay says, putting his coffee back on the counter. “We still have a lot of things to do today.”

 

* * *

 

Jay may have said that, but to be honest it’s mostly just more unpacking for both him and Zane. He takes a survey around his room and groans at the sight of boxes underneath his desk. This house may be theirs right now, but it’s still for rent, even if their parents, especially Zane’s have promised to cover their first couple months. Dr. Julien’s friend who owns the place even allows them to repaint the walls and move around the furniture, so there’s that. Despite the impermanence of their stay, Jay still wants to make a home out of this place. 

The first couple nights here he has already unpacked most of his clothes. Since the weather is getting colder, he has no need to touch any of his summer outfits, but he’d rather get them all lined up in his closet than leave them out. He sighs and goes to work, haphazardly throwing his underwear and socks on top of his unmade bed. The box of summer clothes is full of shirts and pants he’s shoved in during the move. All of them are wrinkled and tangled among each other, so when he pulls one shirt out at least a couple follows. He can already hear the nagging voice of his sensei, telling him to have discipline even in the way he organizes his things. 

“Shut up, Master Wu.” He grumbles under his breath as he yanks a blue tank top out of the box, the force of it sending him stumbling back a bit. “You’re not even a dojo master anymore. And I’m living my life just fine.”

Even when he complains, there’s still a twinge of nostalgia when he pulls out his old martial arts uniform. All of his friends have graduated already, but Nya and Lloyd still want to stay as instructors at their master’s old dojo. Lloyd’s definitely going to take over as soon as his father retires. He frowns at that, rubbing at the texture of his uniform. Just thinking about them makes him miss them dearly. He misses the dorms they used to share. He misses the communal kitchen and the training grounds. He even misses tea time with his sensei where the entire team would just hang around, drinking tea and sharing stories.

Driven by nostalgia, he brings his uniform up and takes a deep breath, inhaling the scent of musk and dust and lingering detergent. But the sudden overwhelming scent of mildew throws him off balance right away. He blanches, making a face at the stink of his cloth. He proceeds to sniff the rest of the clothes in the box, each item reeking of mildew to the point that he feels a little lightheaded. There has to be a source, he concludes, plunging his arms deep into the giant bundle of fabric. When he manages to pull out a couple beach towels that still feel damp in his hands, he decides that he regrets his awful lack-of-discipline in packing clothes.

“Time to do more laundry.” Jay brings the towels to his nose and almost hurls. “And throw these away.”

Five minutes later, Jay finds himself back in the tiny laundry room again, dumping the entire content of his box into the washing machine. Zane hovers by the entryway, looking rather exasperated.

“I told you many times before that you shouldn’t pack damp clothes with other clothes. They will not absorb and dry overnight, especially with airtight containments.” Zane says, and Jay can feel his own eyes rolling hard at his friend’s criticism.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Jay stuffs more of his clothes into the washer, but they end up spilling out onto the floor tiles. “I made mistakes; I learned.”

“I hope you do.” Zane comes over and starts picking up the clothes on the floor. Peering inside the washer, he frowns and starts dragging more clothes out, much to Jay’s indignation. 

“Hey, what gives?” Jay complains as Zane shoves his dirty clothes back into his open arms.

“You’re stuffing the washing machine too full.” Zane says, dutifully pouring the laundry detergent into the correct slot. “Your clothes will not get properly cleaned, and you can overload the machine.”

“Huh, didn’t know that before.” Jay mumbles. When Zane shoots him a deadpan look that makes his ears warm up, he just splutters. “H-Hey, don’t blame me! I’m just doing what I usually do.”

“That explains a lot, actually.” Zane sighs, turning on the washing machine. “Just split the load and you should be alright. Did you make sure that the box only contains your clothes and nothing else? No money, no weird electronics?”

“I’m 99% sure, I think.” He pauses to listen to the washing machine as it fills itself up with water. “Yep, I’m sure.”

Zane shakes his head and heads back into the kitchen, and just as he passes the entryway, there’s a huge clang that shakes the entire machine. Jay stares wide-eyed as multiple clangs are heard, until the machine putters out with a dying groan. Zane steps backwards into the laundry room and levels a cold stare at Jay, who can already feel himself sagging thinking about having to fix a washing machine on his free day. 

“You said you were sure-” Zane begins.

“I knew what I said.” Jay cuts him off, rolling up his sleeves. With a deep heave, he yanks open the washing machine door and peers inside. His clothes are still soaked deep with water, but it seems the water itself is not receding.

“Something’s blocking the pipe.” Jay tells Zane who rolls his eyes at him.

“Clearly.” Zane sighs, but he also rolls up his sleeves and comes up to look inside the washing machine. “There’s still a lot of water in here. We might have to remove the machine and bring it outside. Then we can dump the water and clothes out before we fix anything.”

“Hey, how about we don’t dirty my clothes anymore than this, and instead remove them first before we have to haul this 200 something pound washer down the porch, huh?” Jay snipes back, getting agitated at the situation.

“That is a better solution.” Zane hums, stepping back to look around. “I’ll get you my plastic laundry container. The cardboard box is useless at this point.”

“Please hurry, then.” Jay replies, peering back inside the washing machine with a forlorn sigh.

 

* * *

 

After dumping all of Jay’s clothes into Zane’s container, Jay finds himself wedged between the washing machine and the wall, trying to unplug the machine and also unhook it from the pipe without spraying water everywhere. After five minutes, he stands back up and cracks his back noisily. Zane’s already outside with the container of clothes, basking in the warm midday sun. Jay peers outside the window and watches as his friend wrings each item of cloth over the railing.

“Hey, Zane! A little help here!” Jay calls out, already squeezing himself out of the corner. Thanks to his years practicing martial arts, especially with nunchucks, he does have pretty decent upper body strength. With a slight wheeze, he manages to push the washing machine out of it’s spot. Zane quickly comes to his aid, and thanks to built-in instinct from years of training together, both of them pick up the machine without much fumbling. However, Jay notes as his arms start to slip, they didn’t account for the added weight of gallons of water churning inside the machine. Before he can potentially crush his own foot, he hops away, and his side of the machine tips and lands with a reverberating  _ bang  _ on top of the tiles. Zane curses under his breath and sets his side down with much less noise. 

“Oh my god, are you okay?” Zane hurries to Jay’s side and checks him all over. Jay laughs under his friend’s fussy touches, but when Zane tries to pull his leg up to check on his foot, he has to swat him away. 

“Chill, I’m okay.” Jay rolls his shoulders. “Let’s try this one more time. I just slipped a bit, but I should get a better grip if we lift it by the bottom line.”

“It’s still gonna be pretty heavy.” Zane worries his bottom lip. “If we don’t do this right our backs will suffer.”

“C’mon, Zane.” Jay wrings his hand before squatting down to grip at the protrusion towards the bottom of the washing machine. “I’ve carried Kai bridal style before. If we split the weight between us it wouldn’t even be any close to his weight.”

“I guess you’re right. Still we gotta be more careful.” Zane squats down as well, and with another heave, both of them bring the washing machine up, gingerly timing their steps to each other’s to not have anymore accident. It takes them a while to get out of the door and down the steps of the back porch, but the moment they make it to the grass Jay feels gratification welling up inside him. 

They set the machine down and get to work, tipping it over to the side first to drain the excess water. Once they’ve made sure it’s safe to check, Jay, being the smaller of the two, wriggles his torso into the machine to check for problems.

“I cannot believe it.” Jay says, his surprised tone echoing within the machine. Zane, who’s been waiting for his friend’s update outside of the machine kneels down next to it.

“What’s wrong?” Zane asks. “Is there a wire loose? Are there any coins stuck in the cracks?”

“Nothing like that.” Jay wiggles himself out of the opening and sits up, triumphantly holding up a key chain that has wrenches of multiple sizes dangling from it. “It’s my wrench-chain! It must’ve lodged itself into the water pipe and scrambled it up!” He wipes the wet wrenches against his shirt, clearly delighted. “Oh man, I’ve been looking for this since forever!”

“Jay…” Zane warns, crossing his arms and leveling him a disappointed stare. Jay feels his ears burning again under Zane’s gaze and scratches at them, trying not to meet his friend’s eyes.

“Oh, yeah, sorry.” He grins, feeling rather foolish. “I should’ve checked the box before dumping everything in, huh?”

“And?” Zane raises an eyebrow. Even if Jay knows that nobody wants to disappoint Zane because he’s a magnificent human being, sometimes he regrets teaching Zane how to sass people. He harrumphs and stands up, dusting off the dirt from his knees.

“And I’ll never destroy any household items again.” Jay says, crossing his heart with one of the wrenches. “And I’ll fix the washer right away. Right after I go grab my tool kit and flashlight.”

Zane sighs again, shifting his weight to one leg. “Alright. I’ll see what we can do with your wet laundry. Maybe we can do it the old fashion way and wash by hand.”

“That’s awful and you know it.” Jay sniffs. “Clearly we have developed all this technology to help us with our daily activities. Also you know that detergent is bad for your skin.”

“Well, I would use the washer if somebody hasn’t broken it with his tools.” Zane rolls his eyes back at Jay, who just sticks his tongue out at him and stomps back into the house.

Jay doesn’t like thinking about guilt. Sure, everything that came out wrong today was entirely his fault. He shouldn’t have put damp towels into his box of clothes along with the wrenches. He should’ve taken better care of himself and his belongings, so that his shirts wouldn’t smell like mildew. He should’ve checked before dumping the entire load into the washer, and now it’s broken even though they’ve just moved in two days ago.

With a souring mood, Jay stomps up the porch and yanks open the screen door, kicking his shoes off to the side. The moment he enters the house his eyes immediately goes to the cobweb cracks on the floor where he has dropped the washing machine. Frustration wells up inside him and he rubs at his eyes tiredly. 

“Fucking hell.” He mutters, setting the wrenches aside to check on the cracks. There are already pieces of tiles broken off to the side, showing the hard cement underneath. Jay grumbles under his breath, chastising himself as he picks up the tiles to set them aside. A little cement should do the trick piecing these back together.

When he’s picking up one of the larger cracked pieces, something catches his eyes. There’s an outline of a circle that had probably been spray painted onto the cement. Surrounding the outline is a sliver of something that looks like a symbol. Belatedly, he recognizes it as a voodoo symbol. With his curiosity getting the better of him and his annoyance fading into the background, he starts picking harder at the edges of one of the broken tiles. When he lifts up the piece, more of the circle is revealed. There are layers of symbols and inner circles in there. He realizes, feeling a shiver of dread racing down his back, that this is definitely what Cole talked about.

This was the thing that took Cole’s life.

“Zane?” He squeaks out before clearing his voice again, trying to hide the sudden rise of panic that’s going up his throat. “Zane! You’ve gotta see this!”

“What?” Zane hollers back from outside.

“This is really important, Zane!” Jay pokes his head through the doorway and gestures frantically at his friend. “Come quick!”

“What is it, Jay?” Zane steps into the laundry room, and before he can continue with his question Jay grabs his sleeve and pulls him down to Jay’s level. He points hurriedly at the symbols and watches as understanding dawns in Zane’s eyes.

“Oh.” Zane says, blinking at the cracked tiles.

“Yes, oh!” Jay kneels down next to the tiles. “I never thought this thing still exists! Cole mentioned this before, remember?”

“Yeah, I remember.” Zane squats down next to him, fingers tracing the outline of the circle. “I thought they would have cleaned it up when they were refurbishing the house. This is the weird cult circle that Cole was told to draw.”

“Man, I have chills just looking at this.” Jay bites his lips. “Maybe we should leave it here ‘til Kai gets back.”

“We should text him beforehand, though.” Zane stands back up to fish his phone out of his pocket. “And probably contact Morro, too. This is a huge clue to solving our problem. If we manage to figure out how this works-”

“We can reverse-engineer it and get Cole back!” Jay continues his thought, snapping his fingers at the revelation. “Zane, you’re a genius!” He nudges his friend, who smiles back warmly at him.

“You know this house is not technically ours yet, right?” Zane asks, the warm smile still bright on his face. Jay immediately feels his heart pummeled back to earth. “Even though this is a great discovery, I wouldn’t say that breaking the tiles is doing us any favor in securing this place for long-term in the future.”

“Aah…” Jay stands up awkwardly, cowering under Zane’s icy stare. There’s a beat of silence, and before Zane can react, the smaller man pushes past his friend and sprints at full speed out to the backyard. Zane yelps in surprise before chasing after his friend.

“They’re  _ new tiles _ , Jay!  _ New _ !  _ Tiles _ !” Zane shouts, and Jay can only scream back as they run laps around the backyard.

 

* * *

 

By the time that Kai’s snapped out of his casual jog, he realizes that he’s hopelessly lost. The midday sun is beating down on his bare head and shoulders, but the cool autumn breeze relieves the heat somewhat. At first, he has started the day out with the intention of exploring the neighborhood a little further. He eventually found a park and spent a nice hour jogging around the area. Then, he jogged over a bridge and into another residential area at one point. The area was higher-class than where their house was, so he spent a good amount of time wandering around the blocks. He even spotted a couple hipster coffee and boba shops along with some nice looking eateries.

Now he’s standing in a park that’s completely different from the one he went to earlier with the GPS app open on his phone. The time is almost eleven, and already he’s been getting texts from Zane and Jay asking where he is. Knowing that they’d make fun of him if he tells them he’s lost, instead he simply says he’s on his way back. The GPS does say it’s gonna take him half an hour to walk from this park back home. That’s not too bad, he thinks to himself. Though he doesn’t really understand how he’s managed to wander around like this for almost four hours.

“Aaah, the phone’s battery is down, too.” He mutters sulkily, cradling his phone in his palm. He’s been jogging with his phone plugged in to listen to music, so the battery’s been steadily dropping. Not only that, using data really hurts it in the long run, too. He checks his phone to see the directions to his house, noting the 20% charge it has left. With a sigh, he runs his hand through his sweat soaked hair and follows the GPS. Hopefully he’d make it home before his phone dies.

But he doesn’t.

It’s actually not because the battery drains too quickly. In fact, Kai’s always been cautious whenever things like this happen. It’s a habit that has been instilled into him by Nya and a little bit from their childhood as well. Due to them growing up without their parents around all the time, he and his sister were forced to learn how to fix things by themselves. Electronics, toys, and books, they all had to keep them well. But that doesn’t mean that on his way back home, Kai doesn’t stray into electronic shops and cafes. This is a new place, after all, so he keeps finding himself pausing by different assortments of shops. There’s a really nice looking bar that he wants to check out once everything’s settled. There’s also a couple electronic places that looks pretty decent. Everywhere he looks reminds him of an aspect of his friends and family, so it’s not totally his fault that his phone dies the moment he just enters the neighborhood where his house should be. Now he can’t even call Zane or Jay to pick him up.

Kai squints at the street signs at the nearest intersection. They all look very familiar, but even when he was moving in he already had trouble navigating the neighborhood. Due to its suburban aesthetic, the streets are small and winding, cutting similar-looking houses into neat rows. He’s never really lived in the suburbs before until now. His family had lived in the countryside, and when he transferred to the dojo dorms, it was in the inner city. Kai circles around another block and is faced with more houses. He sighs, his shoulders sagging. His feet are hurting really bad now, but he’s so close to getting home.

Suddenly, he feels a presence right behind him. Before he can even think about it, he reflexively turns around and blocks the reaching hand of the stranger. The man stumbles back, clearly confused, and Kai immediately feels his face heat up with embarrassment.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!” Kai stammers, laughing nervously. “You kinda startled me there.”

“Oh, no, it’s okay. It’s my fault for not calling out to you first.” The man replies, fixing his cuff. He’s a well-groomed brunette who’s wearing a white dress shirt with black pants and a black jacket draped over his forearm. He seems normal enough, Kai decides. Though it is the middle of the day, and most people should be at work by now. The man, oblivious to Kai’s curious gaze, just smiles gently. “I was just wondering if you might need help with directions. I’m a local here, so I know the area pretty well.”

“Oh, uh, thanks.” Kai perks up at his offer. Both of them exchange a firm handshake. Kai sees the twitch on the brunette’s brow at how sweaty his palm is and bites back a grin. “I’m Kai. Me and my roommates just moved here a couple days ago. I went out jogging but right now I’m pretty lost. My phone’s dead, too, so I can’t call my roommates or use my GPS.”

The man laughs heartily and pats Kai on his shoulder in a friendly matter, “That happens to a lot of people, yes! This neighborhood is famous for having long, winding roads. I’ve grown up here, though, so I know this place like the back of my hand. I can direct you to where you need to be.”

Slightly uncomfortable by the gesture, Kai steps to the side to get out of the man’s arm range. However, he agrees that the offer is rather nice. He tells the man the address to his house and describes it briefly. It’s cream colored and rather old-looking. He knows that it’s at the end of a cul-de-sac, at the foot of a large hill. “I mean, it’s only been sold recently, and now we’re renting it from the owner, you know?” 

“I see.” The man mutters, eyes narrowing as if to think. However, something about the sudden cold expression disturbs him. The seemingly cheerful man frowns and taps his fingers to his chin.

“It’s there something wrong?” Kai asks, raising an eyebrow.

“No, it’s nothing.” The man shakes his head. “I know the way there, but…” The man hesitates, wetting his lips. “Have you encountered… anything weird there?”

Immediately alarms start ringing in his head. He’s been through enough trouble to read people’s faces pretty well, and this man is either extremely nervous and superstitious, or he’s sticking his nose in some shady business. Kai narrows his eyes and shakes his head. “I don’t understand. What do you mean?”

The man recoils ever so slightly. Kai watches as he quickly fixes his stance into something more casual. “Oh, no, nothing too much. It’s just I’ve been hearing rumors about that place being haunted, that’s all. I’m a local priest, you see. The church where I work for is just down this street. Now, I’m not one for rumors, but I’ve heard people say that weird things happen in your house.”

“Oh really?” Kai cocks his hip, mirroring the relaxed posture the priest-man has. “Nah, I haven’t seen anything weird yet. I think an old, unsold house tends to freak people out. Superstitious and all that.”

“Very well.” The man nods, the thin smile on his lips becoming a little less strained. “I’m glad that you haven’t encountered any beings with supernatural qualities. However, if you ever need anything, just let me know.” As he says that, his hands stray to his pockets, patting them down to search for something.

Kai tries not to tense up at that, not even letting his guard down as the man withdrew from his back pocket a business card. “Here, hold on.” The man says, procuring a pen in his other hand. He scribbles some stuffs down and hands the card to Kai, “I drew a map of the direction you need to take from this block. You just need to go down another block on this side of the street, and turn left. Then it’s another left by the house with pink flamingos in the front yard. That’s Mrs. B’s house.” The man rambles on for another good minute before finally bidding Kai goodbye.

“Thank you for your help.” Kai smiles, mostly out of necessity. He’s certainly sure to tell Zane and Jay to keep Cole a secret for now. The man beams back and shakes his hand once again.

“It’s good to see a new face around here.” He says, baring his straight, white teeth at Kai. “You can come and visit our church anytime. This is a very nice community, and we’d love to know more of you!”

“Uh, thanks.” Kai waves as he starts his walk back home, the business card clutched between sweaty fingers. “Have a nice day!”

“You, too!” The man calls out cheerfully, though Kai doesn’t look back until he’s halfway down the block. When he does, however, the man’s gone.


	8. in the place rainbow born and dies (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kaboom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to wait until Christmas to post this, but I'm still too impatient.

“Honey, I’m home!” Kai calls out as he stomps off his jogging shoes by the front door. They haven’t had the chance to get an actual shoe rack yet, so he gingerly places them in the corner along with Zane and Jay’s shoes. There’s a whoop coming from the kitchen and Kai instinctively braces himself. Within seconds Jay’s managed to run from one end of the house to another and tackles Kai, clinging bodily to him like a hyperactive koala.

“Ew, you’re all sweaty and shit.” Jay makes a face, sliding off of Kai’s front. Kai knows he’s sweaty. He’s been outside for too long and he’s soaked through his shirt, socks, and underwear. He shakes his head at Jay, who shrieks when he’s splattered with sweaty drops.

“MOOOOM! KAI’S BULLYING ME!” Jay bats at Kai who just laughs obnoxiously.

Zane steps into view with a basket of clothes in his arms. He raises an eyebrow at Jay’s exclamation and tilts his head, confusion clear on his face. “Jay, your mother is still back home. Unless you’re on video call with her, there’s no way she can hear you from here.”

“Nah, Zane, you’re  _ our  _ mom now.” Kai laughs, pulling Jay into a sweaty noogie, to which the smaller man shrieks and kicks at him. They both ignore Zane’s questioning remark of, “ _ I’m not a woman? _ ”, caught up with annoying one another. Feeling exhausted from the long day out and not having enough energy to deal with Jay, Kai lets him go and starts taking off his socks. “Fuck, my feet are so sore right now. I shouldn’t have wandered off that far.”

“You look tired.” Zane sets the basket on one of the steps of the staircase. “Have you eaten anything since this morning?”

“Not yet.” Kai sighs, feeling his stomach grumbling at the thought of food. He pats his belly to calm it down, but it’s never worked that way before, and neither will it now. “I did pass by some cool places that we should definitely check out when we have the time. There’s this really cool looking coffee shop that I wanna take you guys there. There’s also a BBQ restaurant that looks pretty good, too.” At that, his stomach gurgles even louder. Jay snorts next to him and Kai sends him a disgruntled look.

“I’ll whip something up soon.” Zane says, picking up the basket again. “Why don’t you take a shower first and change out of those clothes? It’s better to have lunch when you’re refreshed.”

“See, Zane, this is why you’re the mom of the team.” Jay grins and drapes an arm over Zane’s shoulder. It never fails to be hilarious when he does that due to their extreme height difference, what’s with Zane being the tallest and Jay being the shortest out of their friend group. Zane just snorts and shakes his head before heading back up stairs. Jay calls out as he goes, clutching onto the railing. “Also thank you for helping me with my laundry! I’ll handle the other batch myself!”

“No problem, Jay.” Zane says, his voice fading as he heads further upstairs. Kai follows suit, not before throwing his water bottle and earbuds on the couch.

A shower is indeed a good idea, Kai thinks to himself as he washes off the soap suds on his body. Once his entire body is clean and refreshed from the nice cool shower, he roughly dries off his skin and hair. Not bothering to style his hair for the day, he just goes straight into his bedroom to find a change of clothes and dump his dirty ones in his hamper.

Despite his seemingly careless demeanor, Kai is surprisingly organized. He still has some messy bits here and there like unfolded clothes in his drawers and sports equipment shoved hastily under his bed, but overall he takes care of his things pretty well. His kendo equipment, for example, are carefully displayed on one side of the wall. His beloved shinai is tucked into a corner where no one can accidentally trip over it. As he pulls on a comfy t-shirt and sweat shorts, he also makes sure to push some of his stray weights under his desk with his foot.

Finally done with dressing himself up, he goes back downstairs to check out what the others are doing. Expecting to find Zane in the kitchen and Jay maybe working on setting up their TV, Kai is surprised to find both the kitchen and the common room empty. There’s a plate of grilled cheese sandwich on the counter, though, so he gladly takes it for himself. As he’s stuffing his face with the delicious meal Zane’s prepared for him, Jay enters the kitchen from the direction of the laundry room. The short man makes a show of stretching his back before putting a roll of what seems to be police tape onto the kitchen island.

“What’s with the police tape?” Kai asks through his mouthful. Jay jumps and whirls around, clutching at his chest like Kai’s just stabbed him right there.

“Kai! What the fuck, man!” Jay yelps. “Don’t scare me like that!”

“It’s not my fault I’m too stealthy for my own good.” Kai tries to grin but the sandwich is too delicious for him to make any other faces than chewing.

“Yeah, yeah.” Jay still looks a little frazzled, but then he sighs and slumps over the kitchen island. One of his hands toys with the police tape, and Jay looks back at him, still lying sideways on the surface. “Did you see any of our texts?”

“Nah, only the ones asking where I was.” Kai shrugs. “My phone died on my way back. I should charge it, actually.”

“Oh.” Jay blinks, sitting up completely. “That means you don’t know.”

“Know what?”

Jay looks conflicted, like he’s excited for something, but the excitement maybe unwarranted. He beckons Kai with a tilt of his head and enters the laundry room. Kai follows him, a little confused at the non-answer. The mystery is quickly resolved, however, when Kai steps into the laundry room to find police tape stuck on the floor, surrounding a mess of broken tiles that reveal the cement floor underneath. Jay looks quite proud of himself, posing next to it with his arms out in a  _ ta-daa _ motion. Kai stares at the mess and looks back at Jay before face palming, dragging his hand down his face slowly to emphasize how done he is with his friend.

“Jay…” Kai warns, taking a deep breath.

“Woah there!” Jay raises his arms defensively. “Before you get mad, Zane’s already given me a lecture, so I’m definitely feeling really guilty. But on the other hand…” Jay squats down next to the broken tiles and gestures at Kai. “Take a look at this.”

Kai bends down also and squints at where Jay’s pointing. There’s a hint of a circle and some weird symbols, like someone has spray painted the cement before overlaying it with tiles. He recognizes what it means immediately, and when he looks up at Jay, the other man nods at him in understanding.

“Have you sent Morro this yet?” Kai asks. Jay shakes his head.

“Not yet. Zane and I don’t have his number, so we were going to ask you about it.” Jay jabs his thumb out to the yard where Zane is fiddling with their washing machine. At Kai’s questioning glance, Jay just laughs, his ears reddening in embarrassment. “Yeah, I kind of fucked up the washer unintentionally. It’s a long story, but we accidentally dropped it on the floor while bringing it outside and that’s how we found out about the circle.”

“We’ve only been here for three days, Jay.” Kai frowns and cross his arms.

“That’s what Zane’s told me, too.”

“You’re unbelievable.” Kai scoffs before leaving the room. “I don’t have Morro’s number either, so you guys should text Lloyd instead. He’ll deliver the message.” His sandwich is still warm, thankfully, and he bites into it with a moan. Zane’s too good to be true sometimes, and now that they have him to themselves, Kai truly thinks that he will gain weight if he doesn’t watch his diet.

One the other side of the wall, Jay groans, but Kai keeps himself relaxed as he listens to camera shutter sounds coming from Jay’s phone. After a brief minute, Jay comes back into the kitchen with his phone in one hand.

“Aaaand, send!” Jay presses on his phone screen dramatically. “There we go. I told Lloyd about what we found and asked him to talk to Morro about it. Even sent him pics.”

“Cool.” Kai chomps on his sandwich. “So what are we doing now? Just gonna wait for Cole to show up to ask him about this?”

“I mean, yeah?” Jay shrugs. He slumps back onto the kitchen island again, though his gaze is directed towards the living room. Kai follows his eye line and catches a glimpse of black on the couch. “I wish he wasn’t cursed to only come out at night. I want to just hang out with him more. He seems like a cool guy.”

“He does, doesn’t he.” Kai agrees. “But there’s nothing we can do about it right now.”

“I hope the circle can summon his memories again or something.” Jay mumbles. “Maybe then we can help him find his friends and family. I can’t even imagine what it’s like living without memories of yourself and others. Poor guy.”

“Yeah…” Kai sighs, leaning against the counter. The both of them fall silent, not knowing what to say to continue their conversation. Kai finishes off his sandwich during that time, washes his hands properly, and cleans up his plates. Any other jock-type like him would just leave dirty dishes around, but years living in the dojo dorms and having to share spaces with other people have taught him to keep things clean. He stretches his arms and cracks his head before nudging Jay by the shoulder. “Come on, let’s go set up the TV. We can play some video games if we get it done before the evening.”

When Jay grins back excitedly at him, he realizes that even though he’s lived with these guys for years, he will never truly get sick of them.

 

* * *

 

Cole arrives with little fanfare compared to previous nights. It’s going to become a consistent part of their schedule, Jay notes but doesn’t find himself minding. He does his usual thing of yawning and stretching as if he’s slept through most of the day. Jay’s eyes stray to the sliver of collar bone underneath Cole’s baggy hoodie. Cole, oblivious to Jay’s staring, just scratches idly at his neck, not noticing the rising level of intensity in the other man’s gaze. However, the sound coming from the TV brings him back to reality, and he turns back around, feeling his cheeks warming. Kai, Jay, and Zane are playing Mario Kart right now, with Kai maining Bowser, Jay maining Waluigi, and Zane maining Rosalina. There’s leftover spaghetti and pizza shared among them, but they’re neglecting the food for the thrill of the game.

“Hey, guys.” He greets cheerfully at them. Kai, who’s sitting on the floor with his back against the couch turns around immediately with a grin on his face.

“Cole! You’re up!” Kai says, but before he can continue, Jay lets out a whoop as he sends Kai’s character skidding off screen. Kai yelps and turns back to focus, shoulder-bumping Jay at the same time as an act of defiance. Zane just sighs and steadfastly ignores his struggling friends as he drives Rosalina to the finish line, effectively winning the race. Cole lets out a whistle at that and turns to Zane to give him a thumbs up. Jay and Kai, however, cry out in dismay. Kai almost throws his controller, but he clearly knows it costs too much, so instead he just sets it down gently and buries his face into one of the cushions. Jay on the other hand immediately demands a rematch, to which Zane denies the request.

“Since Cole is here now, we should show him the circle.” Zane says as he shuts down the game and gathers up all the controllers. Jay and Kai scramble to pick up the slack by putting away stray cups and leftover food. 

“Oh yeah! Sure, sure, sure!” Jay grins bright and turns back to Cole. “Dude, it was so crazy this morning! I almost got my foot crushed by our washing machine-”

“You  _ what _ ?” Kai exclaimed.

“-but instead it cracked open the floor! And guess what we discovered?” Jay waggles his eyebrows at Cole, who just looks rather mystified.

“What did you discover?” Cole asks, humoring the shorter man.

“The summoning circle!” Jay flaps his arms dramatically. “It’s still hidden mostly underneath the tiles. We only saw a corner of it, but maybe it will help you jog your memory. If we can study it further, we might even be able to reverse the effects!”

Cole blinks, and everyone in the room can see him visibly brighten up as realization dawns. His small smile slowly widens and he’s grinning fully from ear to ear, showing off his dimples and the crinkle in the corners of his eyes. “Jay,” He says, his body wavering. “That’s amazing!” Before anyone can react, he scoops Jay up and spins him around, bouncing up and down as much as a legless ghost can. “That’s really amazing! Thank you so much!”

“N-No problem, bro.” Jay squeaks, his face smothered by the fabric of Cole’s hoodie. His face burns with an emotion he can’t quite pinpoint as he struggles to pull himself out of Cole’s grip. However, the ghost is surprisingly solid and strong under the layer of fabric, and only when Cole releases him that he’s managed to get out. “You’re getting too excited there, buddy.” He says, wheezing in between his words.

“It’s just…” Cole lets out a sniffling noise. “To be honest, I didn’t remember where it was after a while. Especially when people came in to renovate the place. This is good. This is so good.” He wipes at his eyes even though they’re still dry. “You guys are the best.”

“D’aww.” Kai coos, placing a hand on his chest. “Seriously dude, it’s no biggie. We only got this thanks to Jay’s clumsy ass.”

“Hey…” Jay complains. Zane just laughs and pats his shoulder.

“Well, I don’t tend to believe it’s fate, but I think right now it’s something of a miracle.” Zane says, smiling warmly. “Do you want to see it right now?”

Cole perks up and nods. It’s easy for them to notice that despite the cheer, he’s nervous, too. His hands are gripping at the hem of his hoodie, but he doesn’t look like he’s going to protest against it. In any case, he seems more excited, and the nerves are the kind you’d get when you’re waiting in line for a roller coaster ride. Happy, but also vomit-inducing.

They make their way to the tiny laundry room. With all of them huddled together, it feels somehow more cramped. The room is still dark with just a strip of light from the kitchen to highlight the knick-knacks and machines. Zane waits for everyone to settle before flipping on the light switch. The room lights up and the broken tiles and cement floor become visible for all to see. The fluorescent light casts the room in a pale blue hue and somehow Jay feels a deep sense of dread crawling up his spine.

“So, uh, ta-daa.” Jay says, doing jazz-hands, but the movement feels suddenly too out of place. It’s just nerves, he tells himself. Kai’s looking pretty pumped up in the corner as he bounces lightly on his heel. Zane is carefully watching Cole, who seems entranced by the sliver of the circle. The ghost hovers closer and slowly lowers himself. His fingers skim the tiles, but he doesn’t quite touch the concrete. Jay feels as though he can’t breath all of the sudden at how quiet everyone becomes. 

“Cole?” Kai asks, not really understanding the mood yet. The ghost jolts, and looks up as if he’s finally registered his environments. He shakes his head and cards his fingers through his hair, mumbling something under his breath.

Zane frowns, gently putting a hand on his shoulder. “Cole, are you alright? Do you wish to step away for a bit?”

“I’m…” Cole takes a deep inhale of breath. “I’m…” He turns back to the circle.

“Uhm…” Kai takes a small step forward, hands hovering over Cole’s hunched form. “You need a little breather there, buddy?”

“Uh, Kai.” Jay says as he watches Cole’s face contorts. The ghost landes his hands next to the markings of the circle as his breathing becomes more rapid. It might be a trick of the light, but he swears he sees the outlines of the circle glows green before disappearing. “Kai, Zane, I think…” Jay stammers as Cole’s eyes shuts close. The ghost lets out a drawn out groan, and Jay looks back at his friends; both of them are staring wide-eyed at Cole’s shaking form. “I think we need to go.”

“What do you mean, go?” Kai retorts back, gesturing at Cole. “He’s clearly hyperventilating. We need to calm him down!”

“No, seriously.” Jay steps back and nudges Zane’s hand away from Cole’s shoulder. The other man looks shocked, but he won’t budge as Jay tries to push him. Jay quietly curses his shorter height. Behind him, Cole takes a stuttering breath. Suddenly the air feels like it’s filled with static and Jay watches as the fuzz on his own arm stand on end. The auburn curls on his head start ruffling by themselves and he can feel an air current slowly emanating from where Cole is. He turns around just in time to see the corner of the circle bleeds into a neon green color. From that single point, the lines begin to draw themselves, forming a full circle from underneath the tiles.

“What the fu-” Kai starts.

The room explodes.

Jay feels himself get blown backwards by the sudden shockwave. He lands against Zane’s chest, the other circling his arms around him in a protective hold. Zane tucks him under one of his arm, the other shooting out to grab a flailing Kai before he’s thrown to the other side of the wall. All three of them huddle together behind the heavy-duty dryer. Jay closes his eyes, not wanting to risk his sight at the brilliant flash of light that comes with the explosion. His ears feel like they’re ringing, but with Kai and Zane tucked in so closely with him, he can hear Kai yelling and Zane’s rapidly beating heart. 

When the light and shockwaves die down, the tiny laundry room looks like somebody has just turned on an industrial fan during a level three earthquake. The little curtains on the other side have been knocked off hinge and there are old detergent bottles and empty clothes baskets on the floor. The light flickers off, and the only source of light left is a bright green glow where the circle is.

Kai pushes himself off from under Zane and Jay’s limbs and crawls out once the coast in clear. He peeks around the dryer, the light casting his face in an eerie green glow. Jay watches as he squints his eyes before his face is washed out with shock.

“Holy shit.” Kai mumbles under his breath. “Cole.”

Immediately Jay and Zane follow suit, clambering over themselves to get a view of what Kai’s talking about. When Jay stands up from behind the dryer, the sight in front of him has his stomach dropping to his feet.

In the middle of the circle, Cole floats. His incessant muttering becomes more clear as they slowly approach him. He seems to be wracked with pain; his hands clawing at his hair and his face, drawing harsh lines down his translucent skin. His hair is tousled and flying as if they’re defying gravity, and Jay can see thin wisps of smoke being fanned around the circle. But by far the scariest thing is Cole’s glowing green eyes. The lack of pupil is already disconcerting, but Jay can feel those eyes following his every movement, even though Cole himself is spasming between hunching over and clawing at his own body. Next to him, Kai sucks in a breath and Zane puts a hand over his own mouth, horrified at the view.

The energy emitting from the circle underneath Cole crackles and Cole howls in pain. Without even pausing, Kai immediately leaves their corner to run up to the glowing circle of doom.

“Kai, what the fuck, dude!” Jay calls out. Before Kai reaches the circle, Jay grabs at his sleeve. “Shit is going down right now! What if you get switched with Cole? What will happen then?”

“I-” Kai blinks. Clearly he hasn’t thought about that, and Jay forges on, a deep sense of terror unfurling in his chest. He can’t help but imagine Kai, solid and warm but tinted in green light being turned into a ghost just like Cole.

“We need to figure this out carefully. I can’t afford to lose you.” Jay’s voice shakes but his grip is unwavering. Kai falters, but when Cole screams again, babbling incomprehensible words, he turns back to look at the ghost. Then he looks back at Jay, and Jay can see worry lining Kai’s face.

“He’s hurting.” Kai bites his lips. “Dude, he’s really hurting. We brought him here. We need to stop this.”

“But how?” Jay asks, yanking at Kai’s sleeve. “How can we approach him without getting sucked into that mess?”

“Leave it to me.” Zane calls out behind them. He steps up and settles a hand on top of Jay’s where he’s been holding to Kai’s shirt. “We have to destroy the circle before it does anymore damage to Cole or us.”

Before neither Jay and Kai can say anything, Zane walks past them. His gait is steady, but the way his shoulders are rising up is a tell-tale to how tense he actually is. A glint of light catches Jay’s eyes, and he immediately zeroes in on his chain of wrenches that’s in Zane’s other hand. The taller man stands barely three feet away from the circle, which is already too close for comfort. Jay watches with baited breath. He can’t seem to make himself move, and seeing Kai and Zane step up like that for the sake of another person is just humiliating for himself. 

_ Move, dammit. _ Jay thinks to himself.  _ Just do something. _

But all that comes out is just, “Please be careful, Zane.”

Zane doesn’t look back, but his shoulders lower and the grip on the wrench-chain changes. “I will.” Zane says, and throws the wrenches hard at the visible sliver of concrete and paint.

Zane has always been the best archer in their class for a reason.

The biggest wrench smacks itself right at the outline of the circle and miraculously scratches a line through the paint. It bounces once, twice, and clatters noisily among the broken tiles. The energy within the circle fizzles and crackles, and before Jay can let go of the breath he’s been holding, it explodes once again, flinging Zane backwards and into Kai and Jay’s arms. Even with the shock of another explosion, Cole’s scream still rings out with horrific clarity.

As quickly as the explosion happens, it is sucked back into the circle as if somebody has pressed the reverse button on a TV remote. All the dust that has been stirred up still lingers in the air, but that’s the only indication that the circle exploded in the first place. Jay can feel his heart pounding a mile a minute in his chest like he’d just gone through a cardio session. Zane’s heavy on top of him, but he only registers that weight when Kai starts rolling out from underneath Zane. 

Kai coughs and waves away the dust particles. “Are you guys okay?” He asks. The light in the room flickers back as Zane rolls off of Jay and lands on his butt on the floor. Jay sits back up and massages his neck. He’s definitely going to feel it tomorrow.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” Jay groans. “Zane? You doing good?”

“I’m fine, but…” Zane says, already getting back up on his knees. “What about Cole?”

The moment the question is asked, all three of them direct their gaze towards where the circle is. The glowing has stopped completely, and what’s left is just normal tiles with the bit of concrete like from before. Where the circle should be is Cole, lying prone as his ghostly body’s flickering rapidly. 

“Oh, no.  _ Cole _ !” Jay exclaims, running up to him first. He lands on his knees roughly and tries to comb the ghost’s messy hair out of his face. However, his fingers slip through Cole as if he’s made of air. Just before this, Cole had been able to pull him into a hug. Now his body is spasming, going from a more solid shade to a very pale and translucent green as if somebody’s messing with the opacity tool on his entire being. “Oh, no. What have I done?” Jay whispers. He tries to cradle Cole’s body, but just by touching the fabric of his hoodie, he can feel the usual mass behind it deflating. 

“Oh my god.” He hears Kai whispers by his side. “No, no no no no.” Kai shakes his head, covering his mouth with his hand. “This can’t be.”

Jay looks back at Cole. He feels tears prick at the back of his eyes as his stomach sits heavy at the sight. Zane settles down next to Kai, and Jay can hear his quick intake of breath. Just like that, Jay can feel tears sliding down his cheeks. He doesn’t sniffle. He can’t bear to make a sound. Cole lays pliant in front of all of them, and Jay can’t help but feel like he’s the one who made this happened.

“H-Hallow’s m-.” A voice says, quiet and breathless. It cuts through their grief like a hot knife through butter, and Jay watches as Cole shakily runs a hand through his hair, parting the dark bangs to reveal his eyes. They’re not glowy and scary anymore, Jay realizes with a choked sob.

“Cole?” Kai asks, grabbing at the ghost’s sleeve. Cole opens and closes his mouth a couple times, his eyebrows furrowing like he’s trying to make out words. “Cole, what’s wrong? What do you need?”

“Hallow’s moon. I-” Cole’s breath stutters. The unnatural quality of his voice only gets worse, and Jay can barely make the word out of all the glitches in his tone. The ghost licks his lips to try again, but his body flickers violently one more time before going slack.

The sleeve in Kai’s hand deflates, and they all watch in horror as Cole disappears completely before their eyes.


	9. right back to zero again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> distance makes the heart grow worried

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been over a month since the last update, but once in a while I still get kudos from people. That makes me super happy that people are still reading the fic, and it's a good source of motivation and reminder for me to keep writing!
> 
> Right now, I don't know when the next chapter is coming, but I can assure you that it's in the works. It's just that life happens and school is keeping me rather busy. I've done my best to finish chapter 9 with the help of a new beta-reader, @evelinaonline on tumblr. Thank you for waiting patiently. I hope you will enjoy this just as much as previous chapters!

Lloyd never checks his phone while teaching. It’s a habit that’s drilled into him and his friends over and over again ever since they were starting out as students. In truth, none of them really use their phones a lot, either. Maybe except for the more chatty Jay and Kai. After he finishes his lesson and directs his students back to meet up with their parents, he finally can turn his attention to the messages that have been spamming his inbox. He flippantly scrolls through them, expecting to see gossip from the guys, only to see a photo of what seems to be broken tiles surrounded by police tape.

“What…,” He mutters under his breath and taps on it to zoom in. There’s something that looks like spray paint on the surface of the concrete floor. It looks vaguely familiar, he thinks to himself as he scrolls back through the messages. He doesn’t have time to comprehend the texts, however, when a parent calls out for him from behind. He quickly turns off his phone and sets it aside on his towel to go greet them. 

Whatever it is can wait. He hasn’t seen any urgent messages yet.

It’s only towards the evening when the last class has just left that he’s reminded to pick up his phone again. Nya is with him, helping him pack up their training gears and sweep the dojo floor. Nya and him are certified trainers and have different classes to teach. On the other hand, Pixal is more like an accountant who helps with keeping their finances in check. Lloyd knows that lately she’s been eyeing Borg Industries for their internship opportunities. Nya will leave after she finishes her degree in mechanical engineering. Only he will stick around and manage the old dojo. 

He’s mopping the floor when Nya walks up to him with a dubious look on her face and her phone in her hand. She seems to be reading something on the screen, before she glances up at him.

“Have you checked for Jay’s messages yet?” She asks, frowning when he shakes his head, “He was texting me a while back about finding a weird cult circle in their house, but now he’s not replying to my messages.”

“Oh yeah, I think I’ve seen a bit of it. Is it like, broken floor with police tape?” Lloyd asks, propping the handle of the mop against a wall to go grab his phone. Nya makes an affirming noise behind him and leans against the wall. He catches a glimpse of her typing furiously on her phone and hides a snort. No matter how affable and cool Nya wants herself to be, she’s always been a worrywart for Jay and the group in general due to their accident-prone nature. 

He finds his phone inside his duffle bag. The lock screen is bright with unread messages and he winces at the sheer amount of them. He scrolls back up to where the texts start and reads through them carefully.

“Apparently the circle’s supposed to be what turned Cole into a ghost,” He says by way of explanation. Nya pauses in between her hurried typing and relaxes slightly.

“Okay?” She narrows her eyes at him, “What else? That doesn’t explain why Jay is not answering me. He’s usually better about this.”

“Well…,” Lloyd trails off, scrolling through the texts, “They want me to forward this to Morro first. Hopefully he can decipher some of it and figure out a way to reverse the curse. That makes total sense to me. I actually should do it right now.” He says, already screenshotting the texts and forwarding the pictures to Morro.

“That sounds easy enough,” Nya nods, pushing herself away from the wall. She grabs the handle of the mop and tosses it to Lloyd, who catches it easily, “We should get the cleaning done first, then you can go talk to Morro.”

“You’re not coming with me?” Lloyd raises an eyebrow at her.

Nya scoffs and looks away, but at Lloyd’s insistent doe-eyed stare, her shoulders slump and she looks back at him warily, “You know that I’m having a hard time dealing with him. I don’t know how you can accept him so easily after all he’s done to you, but I guess I’m not his family. Even if you’ve forgiven him, I haven’t, and I don’t expect myself to do that anytime soon.”

“Oh,” Lloyd frowns, “Well, Nya, that’s where you’re wrong.” At her questioning gaze, he turns to the mop in his hand and resumes cleaning the floor, avoiding her eye contact, “I’ve never forgotten what he’s done to me, and even though I act like it, I still haven’t forgiven him, either. Forgiveness is a long and arduous process. I want to be the better man, but I’m still petty. However,” he turns back to her, “I know what it’s like to seek forgiveness after doing horrible things to people. Morro’s working for it, and I’ll make sure he earns it.”

Nya’s eyebrows are up to her forehead, and she looks at Lloyd as if it’s the first time she’s seen him properly all day. Then, she grins, her frown lines tugging at the edge of her smile, “You know what, you’re right. When did you get so wise, huh?” At that, she tugs him down to the crook of her elbow and gives him a noogie, messing up his sweaty hair despite his protests. “You used to be a terrible kid, you know? But you’ve grown a lot.”

Lloyd looks up at her from under her armpit with a smile that’s reflecting her own. “Really, Nya?”

“Yep. You sound exactly like how a dojo master should be,” she takes a deep breath, “Alright. I’ll go with you to meet up with Morro.” Lloyd whoops, but she pinches his lips to cut him off, “On one condition. You gotta finish mopping the floor and help us prepare dinner for tonight.”

“Mmm mmh mmph,” Lloyd replies, his lips still being held shut between Nya’s fingers. She releases him from her grip and he steps back, straightening his back. “That’s a deal.” He repeats, and they shake hands on that.

 

* * *

 

The dojo is on the edge of the city, nestled on top of a small hill and surrounded by trees. The land is privately owned by Lloyd’s great-grandparents and has been passed down through the generations of his family. It’s a beautiful place, and due to its historic architecture and its significance to the city as a landmark, you would’ve thought that business is booming for the dojo. However, Lloyd and his family have always lived frugal lives. While his great-grandparents were rich, the dojo was their only indication towards their wealth. Nowadays they rely mostly on donations and martial art classes to earn them money. They never used the dojo for tourism and never will.

Lloyd and Nya find Morro in Wu’s study room, which has been modified into more of a business room for clients and doing boring adult things like taxes after Wu retired. Surprisingly enough, Pixal is also there. Both Pixal and Morro are pouring over some documents and notes that are filled with too many numbers for Lloyd to comprehend. Pixal responds first, breaking into a polite smile as Lloyd and Nya step into the small room.

“Good evening,” Pixal says, shuffling a stack of paper together, “I hope you both had a great time teaching your classes today. You’ve been working hard lately.”

“Thanks, Pix,” Nya replies easily, leaning against the door frame, “It’s okay today. Classes are normal and uneventful. I’m surprised that you’re still here, though. Usually at this time you and Zane would be on voice chat.”

“Well, I’ve tried to contact him, but he’s not answering the phone,” Pixal exchanges a look with Morro, “So I’ve decided to help teach Morro how to do our bill filing process. Having two people handling the finances is better than one.”

“Hmph,” Morro snaps a notebook close, “I just found it weird that most people who’ve lived here for longer than I have are still very ignorant towards handling monetary issues.” He slides his eyes towards Lloyd and Nya; the judgemental tone has the latter bristling. 

Lloyd steps up before Nya says anything that might be too provoking, “Thank you for pointing it out. As of right now, I still have a lot to learn. However, each one of us has a different role in managing the dojo. While each of us may be lacking in some areas, we always have our friends to guide us. It seems that Pixal is doing a good job doing the same for you.”

Morro doesn’t reply for a very long time. He stares at Lloyd with a furrow in his brows, and Lloyd knows that he’s bested him. There’s no way he can deny that Pixal is the one who’s helping him cover base with something he has never learned before. It also locks Morro in the position that he’s living with different people and he has to accept that they will be there for him even when he doesn’t need it. After a moment of tense silence, Morro looks away and starts putting documents back into their respective files, ignoring the way Nya side-eyed Lloyd and Pixal.

“You texted me about the summoning circle,” Morro states, still not looking at anyone in the eye, “I recognize some of the symbols. It’s closely related to those I used to study when we were trying to summon the dead.” At that, Lloyd flinches, but doesn’t comment on it. Morro forges on, only lifting his head to briefly glance at Pixal, who’s rather confused about the situation, “We need to uncover the entire thing so I can see it. Tell your friends to send over the full picture.”

“That’s the plan, but…,” Nya checks her phone again, “They haven’t said a word to us. Usually Jay would be on his phone most of the time, but he hasn’t been replying to any of my messages.”

“Even Jay?” Pixal blinks, perplexed, “I already find it strange that Zane is not replying to me. When he’s busy, at least he would text me beforehand.”

Lloyd checks his phone again and types a hurried message to Kai. The last time Kai’s sent him a message is during the afternoon, a little after Jay’s sent him pictures of the circle. “I just texted him. If he doesn’t reply within the next hour, we should go and check on them.”

“Before they manage to hurt themselves with that circle,” Morro says, the grim tone of his voice effectively silencing the other’s questions, “These symbols displayed here are death symbols. I don’t know how your friends managed to unearth something like this at their house, but I suspect they’re up to no good as always. Poking their noses in other people’s business.”

“Hey, you have no right to say that!” Nya growls, stepping up, “You don’t know what’s going on right now.”

“And neither do you,” Morro lifts an eyebrow at Nya, who just huffs at the words. He surveys the room with his dark gaze, and Lloyd can’t help but shiver when his eyes land back on him. “You’re asking for my help with this. I don’t even know the details of the mess you’ve landed yourselves in,” he leans forward, folding his hands together. “Tell me everything.”

So they talk. 

They try their best to tell the story, but all of them know that there are things missing. Jay, Zane, and Kai would probably know it better, but they’re not here. They’re unreachable at this point, and Lloyd swallows down his worry as he describes what Cole is like to Morro. He doesn’t mention how afraid of the ghost he was at first, but judging from Morro’s sour expression, the other man already knew. 

At one point, Pixal takes over the conversation. She talks in detail about the curse, how it’s erased Cole from existence by blocking people’s memories of him. She also goes into specific about how it also actively keeps them from finding out his full name. Lloyd has heard the topic in passing before the last time they came over for dinner. Pixal describes it as straightforward as possible; it is as if you’re trying to look through fog. You know something is there on the other side, but you can’t see it. As the story moves on, Morro’s brows slowly draw in in contemplation. He rests his chin on one hand and his phone in the other, his eyes concentrating on the pictures they’ve sent him as he listens to them.

“So you want me, a known criminal who is currently on suspension and under observation from the police,” Morro starts after they’re done with their story, “To look into this potentially illegal cult-work to save some ghost you don’t even know?”

“Well, if you put it that way…,” Nya has the courtesy to look a little guilty, “But you don’t have to do  _ all  _ the work. Just tell us where to go and what to look for, and we’ll do the grunt work for you.”

The corners of Morro’s lips dip down further, and Lloyd finds himself physically shrinking back. No matter how long it has been since their fight against each other and Morro’s reform after that, a part of Lloyd is still deeply afraid of the man. He may be working hard to get back on track, but he’s still extremely dangerous. 

But Lloyd has to be the bigger man. He leans forward towards Morro and watches as the man twitches away from him ever so slightly.

“Please, Morro,” Lloyd chews on his lip, “I know this is utterly ridiculous, but this is what we’ve been doing all our lives. Kai, Zane, Jay, Nya, and Pixal… They’re always there for those in need. They were there for me. Now I’m here for them. If they need my help, I will always be there to help them, so matter how unexpected the situation may be.” He pauses, noting the way Morro’s expression morphs from annoyance to something more neutral, “I’ll do anything for my friends. That’s why I promise that I’ll owe you if you help us.”

“Lloyd, what the fuck?” Nya tugs on his sleeve, her lowered voice coming through like seething instead with the way her teeth are clenched, “Don’t say that. What if, you know?” She glances between Morro and him, “What if you can’t uphold to your agreement? What if  _ he  _ can’t?”

“Morro’s trying to change, Nya,” Lloyd snaps back, annoyance burning hot in his gut at Nya’s bias. “I trust him. He’s been working hard,” he catches Morro’s gaze again, “He’s the only one who can help us with this. You know this.”

“But…,” Nya sucks in a breath. Pixal puts a steadying hand on her arm and shakes her head. Nya sighs, shoulders slumping under the touch.

“I don’t appreciate you guys talking as if I’m not here,” Morro says, and all eyes are immediately on him. He grimaces, ruffling his own hair. Lloyd’s eyes immediately snags onto the green streak that’s already halfway faded. Morro ignores their guilty looks and continues, “Look, cult-work is dangerous business. None of you are fit for this.”

“What do you mean by that?” Pixal asks, crossing her arms pointedly, “I assure you that I can outmatch you in any sort of research and data gathering.”

“Whatever. If you want to look for shit like this,” He gestures towards the picture on his phone, “You’re gonna have to dig deep. There’s a whole network of cults that only people who’ve been in cults know. You can’t look into this shit, because each cult has their own conducts and followings. For example, if you wanna know what kind of shit these guys here follow to create summoning circles like this, you gotta have to be in that cult. There’s a reason why cults are associated with secrecy.”

“There’s an underground network of cults?” Nya asks, eyebrows pinching down in suspicion, “I thought yours was the only one in this city.”

“Not mine. My old boss’s, sure,” Morro bares his teeth, annoyed at her indication, “It was the biggest one, but you didn’t take into account other religious and extremist groups. Not to mention, with symbols like this, this could’ve been one of the many splinter branches. You took down the big guy, but that doesn’t mean there weren’t strays.”

That doesn’t sound good at all, Lloyd decides. He fights back the shiver running from the base of his neck down to his spine and tries not to imagine the hidden underground network of cults. It doesn’t help that he knows they’re all remembering the seemingly innocent office that disguised Morro’s cult. It’s so easy to hide in plain sight, and he doesn’t want to think about churches or schools or shops that only serve as a facade for more sinister workings. Instead, he focuses back on Morro, back on Nya and Pixal. He counts the papers on the desk and takes in the small office they’re seated in.

“So what do you suggest we do?” Lloyd asks. He hides the way his fists are clenched tightly onto the fabric of his pants. “You’re the only one who knows this kind of stuff. If we cannot have access to vital information, we’re all going to be sitting ducks.”

Morro stares at him unblinkingly before breaking into a grin. It stretches from ear to ear, but it’s also rather lopsided. Even that doesn’t help Lloyd feel less unnerved.

“I’ll do the dirty work for you,” Morro says. In the corner, Nya’s shoulders grow tense, but he ignores her. “You guys are too soft and your faces have been on the news before. Everyone will know you just from looking. However, nobody knows I’ve quit cult-work and returned to the dojo as a student. I’ve made sure that information hasn’t been leaked.”

“Okay… What do you mean by that?” Nya asks him. Pixal still keeps a hand on her shoulder just in case she gets too agitated. 

“It means that I am the only one who still has access and an unchecked background,” Morro grins, baring his weirdly sharp canines at her, “You guys want info? You gotta let me do it.”

“And let you get pulled back into crime?” Nya snaps, “Fuck no-”

“ _ Nya _ ,” Lloyd turns to her, his mouth pulled into a thin line. She startles, not expecting Lloyd to cut her off. After a brief stare-down, she turns away, huffing slightly. “You need to trust him. We all do.”

When Nya doesn’t reply, he just sighs and turns back to Morro, “You can do whatever that’s necessary to obtain the info we need on the cult circle. But on one condition.” He waves his hand, cutting Morro off from what he’s about to say. “Any sort of activity you see and do should be reported to us. If this Yang guy is still out there, tread with caution. Please don’t stray from the mission’s parameter, either. I will be covering you from the police if you get into trouble, but if you stray, I will not hesitate handing you over.”

“That’s more than one condition, technically,” Morro says. He looks unruffled, but Lloyd can tell that he’s wary at the threat, “I do have my own terms, golden boy.” Lloyd bristles at the nickname, but doesn’t comment. “First of all, you gotta trust that I know the limits here. Cults are dangerous stuff, and one of the things I gotta do is bad things as a way to prove myself, especially if you want me to join this guy’s group. I will not do anything to you or your friends, so rest easy, kid. Secondly, you told me you owe me one. Once my work is done, I will ask you for one favor,” he stands up from his seat and walk up to Lloyd, “Do we have a deal?”

Lloyd glances at Morro’s outstretched hand before looking back to Nya and Pixal. The latter doesn’t look like she’s going to protest over it, but the former seems to be at a struggle. She will get over it, though. Nya maybe as stubborn as her brother sometimes, but she values rationality above all else. Sure, she will fuss about it, but she knows what has to be done. He turns back to Morro and clasps his hand in his, giving it a firm shake.

“Deal.”

Morro grins, “That’s a deal, then. Now I just need to get some info from your friends to get things started.”

Lloyd opens his mouth to reply, but is cut off by his phone ringing. He picks it up and feel his worry melting off when Kai’s name flashes across the screen.

“Speak of the devil, really,” Lloyd turns to Nya and flashes her a consoling smile, “It’s Kai.”

Nya breathes a sigh of relief at that and nods back at him, urging him to pick up the call. The moment the call is accepted, he switches onto speaker so everyone else in the room can hear him.

“Hey, Kai, I’m putting you on speaker-”   


“We fucked up.” 

Lloyd pauses, “What?”

A choked noise, some rustling. Somebody’s crying in the background.

“He’s gone,” Kai’s voice is tight, but they can all hear the fraying edges at the end of the sentence, “We fucked up, Lloyd.”

“Kai? What’s going on?” Nya scrambles towards the phone, barely holding herself back from yanking it out of Lloyd’s hand, “Where’s Zane and Jay? Is someone crying?”

“Nya…” There, Kai’s voice trembles, and all Lloyd can think about is to burst through the phone screen and teleport himself to where his friend -  no, brother, is.

Kai doesn’t speak for a while, and they all sit there in silent, listening to him trying to get his bearings. Zane’s voice pipes up in the background, but they can’t really hear what he says. There’s some movement, like the phone’s being handed to someone else, and right after that, Zane answers the call, his voice clear against the backdrop of despair that they’re experiencing.

“Kai’s comforting Jay right now,” Zane says by ways of greeting, “To be honest, we’re all currently in a pretty bad state of mind.”

“Zane, what’s wrong?” Pixal asks, her smooth voice edging away the tightness in Lloyd’s chest, “Are you able to tell us what happened or do you need some time?”

“I can give you a brief run down, yes,” Zane answers. There’s a blankness to his voice that’s a tell-tale sign of him trying to hold back his emotions. That’s happened a few times before, but Lloyd hates how it makes him sound so robotic. “The circle that we found has been destroyed partially, but not before damaging the general area. Cole has-” Zane stutters, “-had been the one who activated it. I believe he was compelled but unwilling. He’s gone now.”

“What do you mean, gone?” Lloyd asks, bringing the phone closer to his face.

“The circle seemed to have sapped away all his spiritual energy. We tried to get him out of it as soon as we could, but…,” Zane trails off.

“Oh.”

“...”

Gently, Pixal tugs the phone away from Lloyd’s grip. He doesn’t even notice it until she takes it away from him completely, the indentation of the phone on his fingers. 

“Zane, is there anything you would want us to do right now to help you?” Pixal asks.

“Well…” Zane starts, before a wail cuts his inquiry off. They can hear Kai in the back, trying to calm down a clearly distressed Jay. Zane sighs audibly at that. “I want you to look into something for us if possible. Before Cole’s gone, he gave us a clue about the circle.”

All eyes are on Morro, who perks up visibly at Zane’s words. The ex-criminal has been silent all the way through the call, leaning back against his seat with furrowed brows. Clearly he’s been waiting for some sort of confirmation.

“What did he say?” Pixal holds the phone between her and Morro so he can listen in better.

“Something about ‘Hallow’s Moon’,” Zane answers. 

“That’s our time limit, then,” Morro says, crossing his arms, “That’s just a term that we used to call the Day of the Departed.”

“Morro? What-” The questioning tone is clear in Zane’s voice.

“He’s here to help us aid you guys in your search,” Lloyd explains, leaning closer to the phone. Morro ignores them both and forges on, taking the phone from Pixal’s hand.

“Listen, dates in occult are extremely important. If this ghost’s origin is tied to the Day of the Departed, that means we will have to figure this out before then. Unless you want to call it quits, considering you approached a supernatural situation without thinking of the consequences,” Morro holds up his hand before Lloyd tries to cut him off, “You said the ghost disappeared after coming into contact with the circle, correct? Now we’ve lost our victim completely. Do you still want to continue on with this, especially after you’ve caused blatant distress for you and your friends?”

The shocked silence that follows is not totally unexpected. The line goes quiet, except for the tinny cries that comes out, unbidden thanks to a sort of deep grief that none of them can really comprehend at the moment. Nya looks torn between being infuriated and collapsing on one of the chairs in the room. Pixal’s eyebrows are knitted so deep that Lloyd fears there will be a permanent wrinkle there, but she doesn’t speak. Instead, she looks straight at Morro with her bright green eyes, biting her lip, waiting.

As for Lloyd, he doesn’t even know what to think about anymore. He hates that Morro’s argument makes so much sense, and in a traitorous part of his mind, he wishes for Zane to drop it. Even if Cole is,  _ was  _ a good guy, a part of him is still filled with doubt, much to his own disgust. He can feel the conflict in his mind slowly coming to a boil, torn between helping his friends and walking away. They’ve all suffered so much; isn’t it time to stop? Isn’t it time to get away from it all? Does he even deserve it? Is this even really his business all along?

Then, the answer comes, quiet, but not without strength.

“We will continue on with this. Even without Cole, we still have to bring Yang to justice. He deserves it for killing him.”

“Zane…,” Pixal exhales, letting her shoulders fall.

“I’m sorry, Pixal, guys,” Zane says, and right there Lloyd can hear the ever so slight tremor in his tone, “I have to go now.”

“Bye, Zane,” Pixal replies. He doesn’t answer her back. They hear the telltale click of the end of the call. The conversation is over, but Lloyd can feel the weight of it still.

“That’s that, then,” Morro says, handing the phone back to him, “I’ll start on the research tomorrow. You guys should leave. You all look like hell.”

Lloyd feels Nya’s eyes on him. He doesn’t look back at her this time, his gut churning at the influx of emotions inside of him. To be honest, he feels like hell, too.


	10. it's my turn to bear the load

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> baby fights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY SHIT IT'S BEEN OVER A MONTH. I sorta went into a working frenzy since I'll be graduating in May, so I've been neglecting this poor fic. Thank you all for leaving kudos and comments, even when I can't reply to all of you. Thank you for loving this fic so much! I will give the fic some TLC, too. 
> 
> This chapter is rough, guys. Have fun!

It’s been a week since Cole’s gone.

Jay cried almost nonstop for two days straight. There were tissues littered all over the floor where they last saw Cole and there were tissues trailing up to his own room. Every time he felt like he could finally get over it, his mind immediately pulled him straight back to the memories of the aftermath. Cole, dying in their arms. Cole, alone and miserable for so long, only for them to betray his hope. Cole’s pained face when he gasped his last words.

When Kai and Zane took turns calling Lloyd, Jay couldn’t do anything but cry. It was only thanks to Zane who stayed strong and steady to gather the smaller man up in his arms and carry him back to his room. There, he cried even more, before dehydration and exhaustion seeped into his bones and forced him to sleep. Even then, he did not sleep well. He dreamed of the circle, of Cole, of the explosion. He felt fear, cold and unforgiving, bubbling up in his chest like a vat of tar. Most nights he would wake up freezing and sticky with sweat. Down the hall, he could hear Kai slamming the door and throwing objects. They were all venting in their own way.

Within the span of the week, Jay’s grief transforms from fits of tears and drowsiness to stinging guilt. He keeps thinking about the damned circle, about how he shouldn’t have washed his clothes, how he should have checked his box for his wrenches, how he shouldn’t have dropped the washing machine, how he shouldn’t have shown the circle to Cole, how he should have this, how he shouldn’t have that, etc… It eats at him, the constant nagging of  _ your fault, it’s your fault _ at the corner of his brain. In return, he doesn’t talk to his friends at all. Instead, he hides in his room like the coward he is, only accepting Zane’s food through the crack of his door, and even then he doesn’t eat much. He doesn’t feel much, either.

There’s a knock on his door, startling Jay from his depression hibernation. He tugs his blanket to cover his body tighter, trying to drown out the noise. The knock stays insistent and only grows louder the more he tries to ignore it. Frustrated, he yells out, not bothering to hide the hoarseness of his voice.

“Leave me alone!”

“We’ve left you alone for days, Jay,” Kai’s voice speaks up through the door, “It’s time to go out. You can’t keep holing yourself up in your room like this. It’s unhealthy.”

“Watch me.”

“Jay,” Kai sounds annoyed, “We really need to talk. I know you’ve been blaming yourself for what happened, but this has to stop.”

“But it’s the truth, isn’t it?” Jay sits up slowly, dragging his blanket with him as if it’s the physical manifestation of his own guilt. He holds onto it tightly, not bearing to let go of the safety it provides. “I fucked up, Kai. There’s nothing to talk about.”

“We  _ all  _ fucked up, Jay. It’s not just you,” Kai snaps, his fist slamming against the door so loudly it reverberates through his walls, causing Jay to jump in surprise, “You can’t just think of yourself like that. I’m sick of seeing you like this. You’re always like this. Something that we couldn’t predict happened, and you would just spiral down into this pit you’ve dug for yourself. I’m sick of seeing you cry, Jay. It’s been a week. You have to move on.”

“What if I don’t want to move on?” Jay snarls, shifting towards the door but still staying on his bed, “It was my fault to begin with. All of this happened because I was a dumbass who didn’t organize his shit properly. And then we had to fix our brand new washing machine because of me. Think of the costs, Kai! Not to mention we broke the floor of the laundry room and activated a supernatural summoning circle that basically wrecked the place! And then we dragged Cole into it, too! I  _ killed  _ him, Kai! He fucking died in your arms. Even you have to admit it!”

The shocked silence that follows doesn’t catch up to Jay’s thought as quickly as his own guilt does. Of course Kai is mourning, too, and now Jay has to be that loudmouthed and obnoxious asshole who ruins their friendship in the process. Before he can stammer out an apology, the door bursts open and Kai, frothing at the mouth and livid beyond words, jumps straight at him. Jay slams back onto his bed with a yelp, the high pitched noise turning into pained protest as Kai’s finger scratches at his skin and fists around the collar of his shirt. The taller man tugs at him and straddles him, not allowing him to move. He bares his teeth back and pushes against Kai’s arm.

“What the fuck, Kai?”

“Take that back!”

“Get off of me!”

“Take that back, Jay! You didn’t kill him!”

“No!”

“Goddammit! Stop blaming yourself, you selfish prick!” Kai yanks at his shirt, shaking him up and down. Despite all of this, Jay can feel a familiar sort of anger and frustration welling up inside him.

“I’m selfish, so what? Let me be! This doesn’t concern you!” 

“It  _ does _ , Jay!” Kai shouts, pulling Jay up so hard they’re almost nose to nose, “It does. You’re my best friend. Dammit, Jay, you have to stop being so hard on yourself all the time. I was frustrated, too. I was scared, too. Cole’s gone and it’s our fault but  _ dammit _ , Jay, it already happened. Wallowing in misery isn’t going to bring him back, okay?”

At that, Kai’s grip on Jay’s shirt loosens, and as Jay’s slowly lowered down back on bed, Kai also moves forward, until he’s pressing his forehead at the crook of Jay’s neck. He sobs once, twice, and Jay’s hand drops from his clasps around Kai’s arm.

“You’re such an asshole, you know?” Kai mumbles, his breath hot and tickling against Jay’s skin, “You made Zane worried sick. I had to force him to leave the house for groceries so I could talk to you. He hasn’t been sleeping well, and whenever you didn’t eat, he would look so close to crying. If I wasn’t so hung up over Cole, I would’ve punched you.”

Kai’s a furnace against his body, but Jay’s cheeks run hot not with heat but with shame. He swallows noisily, keeping his eyes on the ceiling. He doesn’t know what to say, so he doesn’t say anything. He watches as his vision clouds over, the familiar sensation of tears prickling at the corner of his eyes. 

“I know this is a hard time for all of us, but we can’t just give up right now. We need to get our act together. Classes start tomorrow, Jay. We don’t have time.”

Jay sniffles, feeling a streak of hot tear run down his cheek. Kai stays above him, his form solid and warm, and Jay is stricken with the fact that he doesn’t deserve Kai. But at the same time, who else would do this for him? Who else would break down his door and shout at him until he makes sense of himself?

He licks his lips, tasting chapped skin and copper. He doesn’t dare to curl his arm around Kai. Instead, he clenches his fingers around the fabric of his pants and tries not to cry. He doesn’t even know what to cry about anymore.

“‘M sorry…” He says, finally, “I just… I don’t know what to do, Kai. It was so sudden. When everything was happening, all I could think about was how  _ useless  _ I was.” He spits out the word like it disgusts him, “You and Zane were quick to react. Without Zane using my wrenches to destroy the circle, things could’ve been so much worse. Without you pushing us to go help Cole, I would’ve just ran away. I’m such a coward, Kai. I couldn’t do anything but watch. I couldn’t do anything right.”

“Jay…” Kai lifts his head up to catch his eyes, and Jay watches as a tear slides down Kai’s cheek and onto his, “You’re wrong. God, the reason why you put Cole in that position in the first place is not out of malice. You  _ cared _ , Jay. You wanted to help him, and that’s all there is to say. And please don’t  _ ever  _ blame yourself for not doing anything. People react differently when they’re afraid. You were just reacting your own way, that’s all.”

“But, it’s like you said,” Jay answers, his face scrunching up as he feels another wave of tears coming in. It crashes, and he chokes on a sob as grief, embarrassment, guilt, anger, all those negative emotions that has been welling up inside him the past few days burst out. “He’s gone, Kai. I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t even know why I’m so upset over this. He was dead in the first place, and we only knew him for a couple days.”

Of course, most of his words come out as incomprehensible blubber, but Kai seems to get it anyway. They’ve known each other for years; it would be a surprise if they cannot understand different language cues from each other. As Jay’s teary display drags on, Kai seems to be compelled to join in, too. He doesn’t cry as loudly as his friend, but Jay can still see the gentle stream of tears coming from his puffy eyes as he gathers Jay into a hug.

“C’mon, Jay. You know I hate to see you cry,” Kai says, his voice cracking, but nonetheless warm.

“God, we’re such a mess,” Jay laughs, though it comes out a little short of breath and nasally. In fact, he can barely breath underneath Kai’s weight, and his nose is blocked thanks to crying. He shifts, wanting to sit up, and Kai allows him to, albeit reluctantly.

“You’re more of a mess than I am,” Kai says, wiping his tears with his own sleeve, “You reek, dude. Let’s get you into the shower, and we can talk more later. I’m sick of feeling sad all the time.”

“Yeah,” Jay agrees, finally standing up from his bed in so long, “I guess locking myself in my own room and not taking care of my own health also contribute to the general shittiness of the situation.”

“That’s why we were so worried, you know,” Kai stands up, too, and bumps his shoulder against Jay’s, “Feeling bad is fine, but it’s exhausting to feel bad all the time.” With that, he walks away, intending to wait for Jay on the other side of the door.

“Mm…” Jay nods. He surveys his room, finally seeing what has been there all this time. Even though it’s barely noon, his curtains are drawn shut, casting the whole room in a mute blue. The basket of unfolded laundry from last week sits in a corner, untouched. Paper plates of old food fill up his trash can, and he chastises himself for not noticing how much it reeks in the first place. There are still socks and miscellaneous items strewn across the room, and instinctively, Jay’s eyes stray to the spot where Cole’s hoodie was first found. He swallows down all the negative thoughts inside his head and turns back to the doorway where Kai’s waiting.

“Jay?” Kai asks, concern evident on his face.

“I’m coming,” Jay replies, and follows Kai out into the hallway. They stand there, just outside of Jay’s room, but he hasn’t felt that light in a while. He looks up to Kai, inspecting the scar that cuts across his right cheek and the bags that weigh heavy under his puffy eyes. His friend holds his gaze, not really understanding why he’s being inspected so carefully.

“I’m sorry for making you guys worry,” Jay says, looking away from Kai. In the blink of an eye, there are arms wrapping around him and pulling him into a hug so tight it’s lifting him up to his tippy toes.

“We just care about you, that’s all,” Kai sets Jay down right after, but before he pulls away, he bends down slightly and leans in close, ruffling Jay’s hair, “Now go take a shower. Get yourself all cleaned up. You’ll feel better, I promise.”

There’s a soft pressure against Jay’s cheek. It’s so brief that even before Jay can confirm it, Kai’s already pulling away. In a matter of seconds, Kai has walked from one end of the hall all the way to downstairs. Jay stays rooted at his spot, and it’s only hearing Kai stumbling over a piece of furniture that he manages to snap out of his daze. Gingerly, he touches the spot where Kai’s lips have been and feels the heat radiating from his cheek.

“Huh?” He squeaks.

 

* * *

 

He doesn’t know what to think about the kiss.

Jay’s torn between taking it as a platonic gesture and a romantic one; Kai has always been a touchy-feely type and on multiple occasions has kissed Nya and Lloyd on their cheeks, forehead, nose, what-have-you. At the same time, there’s no way that kiss is a brotherly-love kiss. He tries to remember that sensation, when Kai’s chapped lips grazed against his cheek. He wonders if Kai can taste the tear stains on his skin and feels his face grows hot at the thought. He scrubs at his face furiously, trying to get rid of the violent blush that’s spreading from his face down to his chest. The hot shower is not helping either, he thinks to himself, and turns the dial to cold as a defense mechanism.

He regrets it immediately when his warm body is doused with a stream of freezing water, effectively ruining his momentary relaxation in the shower. If he yelps like a little girl, nobody’s around to hear it anyway. However, years of rigorous training under Wu have taught him how to meditate under unpleasant forces. He takes a deep breath, spits out the water that falls into his mouth, and let the sound of water drain away his worried thoughts.

It’s easy for him to let his mind wander in the shower. He doesn’t linger on the kiss, not right now. He tries to focus more on the droplets of water hitting his body and how searingly cold they are. Slowly, his body adjusts to the temperature and he allows himself to grow numb under the onslaught of shower. He wonders if this was what Cole felt like, to have all his nerves become desensitized when he turned into a ghost. Feeling his stomach churn at the thought, he quickly turns off the shower and shakes his head, splattering water everywhere on the walls and curtain.

“Dammit, why am I so distraught over this?” He grumbles to himself, carding his fingers through his wet hair. 

Cole lingers in his mind like a ghost, pun not intended. He lurks in Jay’s subconsciousness even as the brunette goes through his habitual motions. Jay thinks about haunted eyes and wonders what their colors were when he was alive as he towels himself off and puts on fresh clothes. When he pulls his bedroom curtains apart to let the light in, he tries to remember the feeling of being scooped into Cole’s arms and how both soft and solid he was. As he gathers all his trash into a big plastic bag, he thinks about the ghost fading in front of their eyes. A ghost can’t die, can it? Is there an afterlife for him, or is he bound to this house forever like what he said before?

He pauses mid-thought, his hands deftly tying up the trash bag. 

“What if Cole never really left?” He asks aloud. 

 

* * *

 

Kai’s fixing himself a cup of tea when Jay almost bodily throws himself down the stairs. The loud crash, punctuated by little “whoops” and “excuse me”, is enough to alert Kai that Jay is in a rush, and when Jay’s rushing, there’s no stopping him. 

“You look refreshed,” Kai comments, sipping his tea, not a hint of curiosity in his tone. Inside, however, he’s a million little beetles squirming around, frazzling his mind with the memory of him kissing Jay. It was bold, unprecedented even. All of his control was lost in that moment, when Jay had stared up at him with puffy, teary eyes, and all he wanted to do was to make that sadness go away.

This present Jay, however, is as bright-eyed and manic as can be. He still has some red to his eyes, but he looks leaps better that the Jay he found curled up in his own bed. He’s dressed comfortably, too, with a new shirt and sweatpants. Kai catches the determination in his gaze and pauses, setting his drink down with a little clank against the tabletop.

“Jay?” He asks, the squirming feeling in his chest intensifying. He hopes this is not about the kiss. Even right now he feels naked and ill-prepared to face his best friend. His feelings to the side, he shouldn’t have kissed him without consent at all. All he wishes for now is for Jay to take it as something more platonic. Heck, Kai is just as confused as Jay is, probably.

“Cole is dead.”

Okay, that’s not what he’s expecting at all.

“... Yes?”

“Kai,  _ Cole is dead _ .”

“I thought we’ve already talked about it.”

“No, Kai, listen,” Jay pulls out a clunky looking device from one of his baggy pant pockets and almost slams it on the table. “Cole was already dead. Ghosts don’t die a second time, because  _ they’re already dead _ .”

“What do you mean?” Kai stares at the device uncomprehendingly. “I don’t understand.”

“This is just a thought,” Jay licks his lips, and Kai’s eyes stray to them. “What if, since Cole was already dead, and since ghosts probably can’t die a second time, that means that instead of killing him, the circle only makes him invisible? Like, make his spirit less tied to this world.”

“You mean, you’re thinking that he might just be less of a solid presence?” Kai blinks, finding his eyebrows climbing up at the thought.

“It’s just a theory, but I think it makes sense, logically, I mean,” Jay fiddles with the device, but his nervousness really shows through him not really meeting Kai’s eyes, “Cole said that the curse has anchored him to this place, and it was that circle that did it. What if when he triggered it and faded away, his soul was, as per the curse, bound to this house? He couldn’t have gone to the afterlife. We would probably need a different sort of circle, or maybe like an exorcism.”

“So what you’re saying is that there’s a high chance that Cole is still around, but invisible?” Kai frowns, “That means that there’s a way to kind of like, condense him back again, right? Is that what you’re thinking about?”

“Not really, no,” Jay deflates at that, but he shakes his head and gestures towards the device in his hand, “But this, this can at least detect his presence.”

Kai squints at the clunky looking remote control in Jay’s hand. Something about it looks familiar, and if it’s meant to detect ghosts, then-

“Wait a minute. Isn’t this one of those cheap ghost detectors we got from eBay? Way back when Morro was still in a cult and was trying to summon demons or whatever?” Kai snags it out of Jay’s hand. He rotates the device around, noting how the back of the device has been pried open and taped back to back with some sort of chunkier and more dangerous looking piece of hardware. “Dude, what have you done to it?”

“Oh you know, played around with it and maybe add in a couple more notches of amplifier,” Jay shrugs, “It’s old, but I think I can still make it work.”

Kai doesn’t reply for a moment. Jay watches as his eyebrows draw down as he stares at the EMF reader in his hands. He notices quite belatedly that Kai seems very tired, too. Usually this sort of thing would cheer him up as he’s always the one to go first at the thought of an adventure. Now he seems a little more world-weary, like life has finally caught up to him. His hair droops down more than usual, and the downtrodden mood also shows through the sloping of his shoulders. He slouches more, too. It seems he’s still grieving in his own way.

“Kai?” Jay prods. He reaches out his hand, hesitates, and slowly places his fingers on top of Kai’s.

Kai doesn’t pull away from the touch, his grip on the device slackening. He shakes his head and looks back at Jay. He smiles, but it’s closer to a grimace. “I’m alright,” he answers.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright,” Jay gently pries the device from Kai’s hands, “I’m gonna start it now. You okay with that?”

Kai shrugs and brings his cup of tea to his lips. Jay takes that as a yes and starts setting up the controls. However, before he even hits start, a lurching feeling pierces straight through his chest, and he stops. The device still sits innocently in his palm, but suddenly it becomes too unbearable to even look at it, to even imagine what happens after he turns it on. 

“Just don’t want you to get your hopes up…” Kai mumbles rather petulantly into his drink. It’s clear it was not meant to be heard, but the words pounded into his ears as if it’s been plugged through an amplifier. Suddenly, all the anxiety that he’s tried so hard to wash away comes flooding back and he feels like drowning again. His hand doesn’t shake, but he feels rattled to the bone. There’s a fifty-fifty chance that it might work, but why is he even hoping that might even be the case? Why did he waste his time looking for this device instead of worrying about other things, like pre-class assignments and writing his resume?

“Jay?” Kai asks, ignorant of Jay’s inner turmoil.

His names sounds like a bolt of lightning through the storm in his mind. He slams the device on the table, startling Kai into almost knocking over his tea.

“Dammit Kai, you’re such an asshole, you know that?” Jay shouts, barely keeping his voice from cracking, “You forced your way into my room and dragged me out. You wanted me to get over it, so I tried! I even thought of a way that might be able to help! But now I can’t, because of my dumb fucking insecurities are holding me back! And you! You’re not supposed to wish for someone to not have their hopes up! I cried for days, Kai!”

“Wait, what?” Kai flinches back, not quite hiding his guilty expression, “You heard that?”

“Of course I did!” Jay jumps up, leaning his upper body against the counter. “Listen, Kai Smith. Don’t you dare play with my heart like this. You don’t know what I’m going through right now.”

“As if you know what  _ I’m _ going through, either!” Kai snaps back, hackles raised, “All you did was sit around in your room and mope! Both Zane and I had to pick up the pieces and tried to clean up the mess that  _ you  _ made! I tried so hard to stay away to give you space, and I just couldn’t anymore!”

“Couldn’t what, Kai? Couldn’t stand having a crybaby like me around? Couldn’t handle the fact that I actually had emotions about all this?” Jay gestures around the space in their kitchen and towards the laundry room, his face growing hot with rage. “I find it interesting how you can be so flippant about the situation!”

“I’m not flippant about the situation!” Kai slams his hands on the table and leans forward, baring his teeth at Jay, “I’m trying my best here, dammit! Why can’t you see that? At least one of us has to stay strong for this!”

“Have you taken into consideration that I want to do something, too?” Jay holds up the device and almost shoves it directly into Kai’s face, “The moment I tried to get something to work, just for once, you immediately reacted negatively. Couldn’t you just encourage me like you did this morning?”

“It’s because I don’t want you to get hurt!” Kai grabs at his shoulders, almost shaking him. “Not again! Not like last time! You got your hopes up and looked at what happened! I don’t want you to hurt yourself again if things doesn’t turn out right! We gotta move on!”

“Don’t tell me how I should feel!” Jay wriggles out of Kai’s grip, this time effectively smacking Kai’s face with the EMF reader.

“Ow!”

“Both of you, stop this instance!”

All activities immediately halt as Zane storms into the kitchen, carrying bags of groceries in each hand. Jay has never seen him this livid before with his eyebrows drawn in so low that the wrinkles might become permanent. There’s a tight frown on his face, but nothing can stand out against how absolutely red his face is. Zane doesn’t even bother dropping off his groceries at the counter, instead he places them at the entrance and keeps advancing towards him and Kai. Zane is hardly ever angry, but when he is, everyone knows not to cross him any further. Kai looks ready to protest, though, but Jay’s already scrambling off to the side to distance himself from Kai. 

“I can’t believe it!” Zane snaps, throwing his arms in the air, “The moment I left the house for a couple hours, you two are at each other’s throat! What is wrong with you?”

“He started it!” Jay turns his head around just in time to see Kai pointing accusingly at him. He grinds his teeth and holds back a wave of tears that prickle his eyes at the blatant display of betrayal. 

“I didn’t do anything! It was you who told me to give up!”

“I didn’t tell you to give up! I was just saying, you shouldn’t get your hopes up!” Kai fumes, stepping around the kitchen aisle.

“You already did get my hopes up!” Jay snipes back, clenching his fists threateningly, “You kissed me, Kai! You did!”

“ _ What? _ ” 

Zane’s voice, lacking in anger and just more plain surprise, is enough to get both of his and Kai’s head out of their argument. Instead of looking furious, he just takes a step back and swivels his head between Jay and Kai. Jay feels his stomach drop at the stricken look on Zane’s face, and in the corner of his eyes he sees Kai flushes red.

“What’s going on? Kai? Jay?” Zane asks, looking so hopelessly lost. Jay feels the fight drain out of him at the sight of his best friend having to stand there and witness this awful argument.

“Zane, I-”

“I’m heading out,” Kai says, shouldering past Zane without even a peep of an apology. 

“H-Hey, wait!” Jay tries to run after him, but Zane quickly blocks him, using his taller stature as a wall.

“Just let him be,” Zane murmurs, “We need to talk, but not right now.”

Kai only grumbles and grabs onto the nearest sweatshirt to drape himself over with. With the weather entering fall, the temperature has been dropping steadily over the days, and Kai’s always been the one who prefers warmer climates. Only that, the black sweatshirt in his hand is not a sweatshirt at all, Jay realizes with dawning dread. He tugs at Zane’s arm and pulls him to look where he’s looking as Kai pulls the clothing over his head, distracted by his own anger. 

“Kai, wait!” Jay yelps. Next to him, Zane sucks in a breath. Kai just turns back to them, completely normal despite wearing Cole’s hoodie.

“What?” He grumbles as he starts putting his shoes on.

“Uh, n-nothing?” Jay squeaks.

“Your shirt-” Zane points out, gesturing vaguely.

“My shirt?” Kai looks down, only seeing black fabric. “What do you mean my shirt-”

Kai cuts himself off immediately, mouth going slack. Jay and Zane watches in horror as their friend bodily jerks before dropping onto the floor, spasming on top of discarded shoes and dirty doormat. Jay clamps a hand over his mouth as horror grows into sickly bile. He swallows back the bitter taste and hurries after Zane, who’s already running across the house to reach Kai. 

“Oh my god, what do I do? What do I do?” Jay runs a hand through his hair, not knowing where to even start as Kai flops around like a fish out of water in front of him.

“Hold his legs down!” Zane orders, already grappling Kai’s upper body and pressing his weight on top of him, “We can’t allow him to potentially injure himself!”

“Right, okay,” Jay agrees, quickly grabbing hold of Kai’s bucking legs and settling on top of them. He winces when Kai accidentally knees him in the ribs, “Okay, so what about him potentially injuring us?”

“Just hold on, alright?” Zane huffs, not in the mood for Jay’s sass.

Thankfully, Kai only struggles for less than a minute more before he eventually slumps, gulping for air as if he’s just ran a marathon. His hair is matted against his forehead, and his eyes are scrunched up as he tries to regain his breathing. 

“Hey buddy,” Jay pats his legs, “You doing good?”

“Kai, are you alright?” Zane asks, pulling his hair away from his face, “You took a pretty hard fall. The hoodie is doing something to you. You should take it off as soon as possible.”

Kai groans in response, grabbing at his face and rubbing at it as he sits up. Both Jay and Zane quickly scoot away to make space for their friend. 

“Kai, you doing okay?” Jay asks, hovering his hand over him just in case he keels over again. Kai however just shakes his head, before opening his eyes to blink up hazily at Jay and Zane. His brilliant green eyes seems to almost glow despite there being daylight out, and Jay feels almost faint.

He distinctly remembers Kai’s eyes to be a warm amber color. They’ve never been _green_.

“Kai?” Kai asks, staring at Jay and Zane quizzically with those piercing green eyes. “What do you mean? My name is Cole.”


End file.
